Successful sports professionals can earn a great deal more money than people in other important professions. Some people think this is fully justified while others think it is unfair.
Nowadays, many professional athletes get big salary even bigger than people who have significant professions. For several people, it is reasonable enough for athletes as much as their contribution to delegate their countries. However, there are people who thinking is not fair.
A group of people who agree with athletes’ salary think that it is fair for athletes to get substantial income because athletes get it with hard work during their lives. Furthermore, when the athletes have become delegation for their countries, it is fine for athletes that can earn a great deal as one of achievement for the athletes. For example, Taufik Hidayat, a badminton athlete, a badminton world champion, get big salary with strong effort that make him to become a professional athlete and one of delegation from Indonesia in badminton.
On the other hand, for the people who thinking is not fair, they have opinion that the profession likes athletes is not important in which is not fair if athletes get bigger income than other significant profession like expert people who work in industry sector.
It is thought that is fair for professional athletes to earn big revenue from what they have done for their countries. For instance, the athletes have dedicated their lives as representative for their countries. So, it is fine that athletes can earn a great deal in salary.
In summary, it is fair to earn much money for athletes who have work hard or even since they are as miniature of their countries that have duty to bring a good reputation.
Sentence: However, there are people who thinking is not fair.
Description: A WH-pronoun, nominative is not usually followed by a verb, present participle or gerund
Suggestion: Refer to who and thinking
Sentence: For example, Taufik Hidayat, a badminton athlete, a badminton world champion, get big salary with strong effort that make him to become a professional athlete and one of delegation from Indonesia in badminton.
Description: The fragment that make him is rare
Suggestion: Possible agreement error: Replace make with verb, past tense
Sentence: On the other hand, for the people who thinking is not fair, they have opinion that the profession likes athletes is not important in which is not fair if athletes get bigger income than other significant profession like expert people who work in industry sector.
Description: A WH-pronoun, nominative is not usually followed by a verb, present participle or gerund
Suggestion: Refer to who and thinking
flaws:
No. of Grammatical Errors: 3 2
No. of Words: 258 350
No. of Different Words: 110 200
Attribute Value Ideal
Score: 6.0 out of 9
Category: Satisfactory Excellent
No. of Grammatical Errors: 3 2
No. of Spelling Errors: 0 2
No. of Sentences: 11 15
No. of Words: 258 350
No. of Characters: 1249 1500
No. of Different Words: 110 200
Fourth Root of Number of Words: 4.008 4.7
Average Word Length: 4.841 4.6
Word Length SD: 2.649 2.4
No. of Words greater than 5 chars: 84 100
No. of Words greater than 6 chars: 61 80
No. of Words greater than 7 chars: 50 40
No. of Words greater than 8 chars: 29 20
Use of Passive Voice (%): 0 0
Avg. Sentence Length: 23.455 21.0
Sentence Length SD: 10.638 7.5
Use of Discourse Markers (%): 0.636 0.12
Sentence-Text Coherence: 0.469 0.35
Sentence-Para Coherence: 0.706 0.50
Sentence-Sentence Coherence: 0.139 0.07
Number of Paragraphs: 5 5