Food preparation has become easier to prepare. Has this change improved the way people live ?
Since food sources were limited and sometimes scarce, our grand grandfathers and grand grandmothers had lots of difficulties to find and prepare food for their children. These days we don't have such problems. We can go to stores and buy what we need. This change has had several effects on our life including: increase of food waste, decrease in mortality rate caused by malnutrition in different countries and save our times and energy.
One of the major problems that existence of abundant sources of foods has made is that some people waist large parts of food and they don't use them properly. When a person goes to a restaurant, he cannot eat all of things that he has ordered and the workers of restaurant discard it. Such situations destroy large amount of food sources. However sources of foods are limited and if we don't use them properly, one day they will finish.
In this modern world lots of people have easy access to food. On the contrary, in the past some people died because didn't have enough foods. Using technology to breed plants with high efficiency is one of the primary reasons of this change. On the other hands this change has entered chemical materials, that used for increasing fertility of plants, in our meals, and we can see strange illnesses and new cancers derived from these new foods.
In the past people spend most of their times to make or find foods. In another words preparing food was their major goal on their life. As a result most of them were farmer. However in modern world, people are not concerned about foods. They have to just earn money to prepare foods. Thus, new careers have been made and people can save their time and even use it in the way we want to.
In conclusion, with increasing source of foods people's problems not only have reduced but also, the type of them have changed. They encounter new problems. We just can hope that one day human will find a way that does not destroy nature to make foods and also a way that doesn't use chemical materials to produce foods.
Post date | Users | Rates | Link to Content |
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2013-09-12 | mohsenrafiees | 70 | view |
Sentence: In another words preparing food was their major goal on their life.
Description: A determiner/pronoun, singular is not usually followed by a noun, plural, common
Suggestion: Refer to another and words
flaws:
Don't need to list reasons in the introduction paragraph.
Better to follow this pattern:
Para 1: introduction. my choice: A or B. agree or disagree.
Para 2:First,reason 1 (1 sentence) + why reason 1(some arguments. 2-3 sentences) + examples for reason 1 (around 2 sentences) + small conclusions (like advantages of reason 1 or comparisons if not reason 1, 1-2 sentences).
Para 3:Second,reason 2 ,blabla... do the same thing like First
Para 4:Third, reason 3 blabla... do the same thing like First but shorter
Para 5: Conclusion.
Attribute Value Ideal
Score: 22 in 30
Category: Good Excellent
No. of Grammatical Errors: 1 2
No. of Spelling Errors: 0 2
No. of Sentences: 21 15
No. of Words: 366 350
No. of Characters: 1628 1500
No. of Different Words: 183 200
Fourth Root of Number of Words: 4.374 4.7
Average Word Length: 4.448 4.6
Word Length SD: 2.241 2.4
No. of Words greater than 5 chars: 96 100
No. of Words greater than 6 chars: 68 80
No. of Words greater than 7 chars: 39 40
No. of Words greater than 8 chars: 25 20
Use of Passive Voice (%): 0 0
Avg. Sentence Length: 17.429 21.0
Sentence Length SD: 8.974 7.5
Use of Discourse Markers (%): 0.333 0.12
Sentence-Text Coherence: 0.304 0.35
Sentence-Para Coherence: 0.509 0.50
Sentence-Sentence Coherence: 0.149 0.07
Number of Paragraphs: 5 5