"On Balmer Island, where mopeds serve as a popular form of transportation, the population increases to 100,000 during the summer months. To reduce the number of accidents involving mopeds and pedestrians, the town council of Balmer Island should limit the number of mopeds rented by the island's moped rental companies from 50 per day to 25 per day during the summer season. By limiting the number of rentals, the town council will attain the 50 percent annual reduction in moped accidents that was achieved last year on the neighboring island of Seaville, when Seaville's town council enforced similar limits on moped rentals."
The argument that by limiting the number of mopeds can reduce the number of accidents involving mopeds and pedestrians seems tenable at first glance. However, if we see on it deeper, it will be many flaws of that statement.
First of all, reducing the number of mopeds rented can not guarantee the reducing of accident since it can happen by many factors, not only moped. In fact, accident can happen by private car, motor bike or another public transportation. To tenable the statement that more mopeds imply more accident, it necessary that author provide the statistical data of accident and show that the majority of them correlates to mopeds. In addition, reducing the number of moped rented will leads the the citizen uses their own vehicles. In this situations, the increasing of private vehicle usage will not only boost the number of accident but also make road more crowded than before.
Secondly, the notion that by limiting the number of rentals can reduce mopeds accident about 50 percent as Seville island did can not be justified. This statement can not be accepted due to many factors that make it possible in the neighboring island such as the landscape and the number of population in that island. There may be, in Seaville island, that the number of mopeds are larger than the people who use the service of mopeds. And also the landscape of that island makes people in danger if they drive mopeds. Consequently, limiting the number of mopeds will give contribution in reducing accident on Seaville island. In this situation, the author should determine the circumstances of population and the landscape on Balmer island before limiting the number of mopeds rented.
In conclusion, the argument is contain many flaws and open to debate. The author should provide more evidence in order to justify the idea.
| Post date | Users | Rates | Link to Content |
|---|---|---|---|
| 2013-12-09 | alimashreghi87 | 53 | view |
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Sentence: To tenable the statement that more mopeds imply more accident, it necessary that author provide the statistical data of accident and show that the majority of them correlates to mopeds.
Description: A pronoun, personal, nominative, 3rd person singular is not usually followed by an adjective
Suggestion: Refer to it and necessary
Description: The fragment author provide the is rare
Suggestion: Possible agreement error: Replace provide with verb, past tense
Sentence: In addition, reducing the number of moped rented will leads the the citizen uses their own vehicles.
Description: The word will is not usually used as a noun, singular, common
Suggestion: Refer to will
Description: The token the is not usually followed by an article
Suggestion: Refer to the and the
Sentence: In this situations, the increasing of private vehicle usage will not only boost the number of accident but also make road more crowded than before.
Description: A determiner/pronoun, singular is not usually followed by a noun, plural, common
Suggestion: Refer to this and situations
Sentence: In conclusion, the argument is contain many flaws and open to debate.
Description: The token is is not usually followed by a verb, base: uninflected present, imperative or infinitive
Suggestion: Refer to is and contain
flaws:
No. of Grammatical Errors: 6 2
No. of Different Words: 138 200
Read a good grammar book.
Attribute Value Ideal
Score: 3.0 out of 6
Category: Poor Excellent
No. of Grammatical Errors: 6 2
No. of Spelling Errors: 0 2
No. of Sentences: 15 15
No. of Words: 306 350
No. of Characters: 1486 1500
No. of Different Words: 138 200
Fourth Root of Number of Words: 4.182 4.7
Average Word Length: 4.856 4.6
Word Length SD: 2.482 2.4
No. of Words greater than 5 chars: 123 100
No. of Words greater than 6 chars: 71 80
No. of Words greater than 7 chars: 52 40
No. of Words greater than 8 chars: 26 20
Use of Passive Voice (%): 0 0
Avg. Sentence Length: 20.4 21.0
Sentence Length SD: 6.151 7.5
Use of Discourse Markers (%): 0.8 0.12
Sentence-Text Coherence: 0.402 0.35
Sentence-Para Coherence: 0.596 0.50
Sentence-Sentence Coherence: 0.137 0.07
Number of Paragraphs: 4 5