At universities and colleges, sports and social activities are just as important as classes and libraries and should receive equal financial support.
please help me refine my essay.
Universities and colleges play significant role in students’ life. These educational institutes not only provide educational facilities like classes and libraries, but must improve students’ abilities in social and sports fields. In my opinion, it is their responsibility to support financially non-educational aspects as well as educational aspects.
First, nowadays an all-rounder person has great status in society. Students must be learn their own fields sufficiently, also foster their social skills, Athletic abilities and etc. all these competences make them take up a good job and are satisfied in their lives. For example, a successful manager is a person who is able to have doing well social interactions and ability for dealing with difficulties; these are proficiency that come from his experiences in real life. In contract, a manager that just studies management and does not have any social activity fails to obtain a good situation as a career.
Second, there is a Persian idiom that says” a well mind is in a healthy body.” A good sport activity plan is necessary for students. They must contribute in sport activities, compete with each other, have a happy time and become more familiar with together. It is clear that in a solid and strict atmosphere like universities and colleges, a recreation plan such as sport activities, make a good balance for students. For instance, a student who is good in track and field learns to be more resistant and agile in studying than a student just peruses educational goals and does not pay attention to his physical activities.
Finally, it can be said that every society needs person who is well brought up his genius, has different abilities to deal with problems in his career and also in his life. Universities and colleges with providing opportunities for improving young people’s abilities in all fields, take an important step.
Post date | Users | Rates | Link to Content |
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2015-06-16 | atabak | 80 | view |
2016-08-10 | donya goodarz | 76 | view |
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flaws:
No. of Different Words: 168 200
Attribute Value Ideal
Score: 24 in 30
Category: Good Excellent
No. of Grammatical Errors: 0 2
No. of Spelling Errors: 0 2
No. of Sentences: 14 15
No. of Words: 307 350
No. of Characters: 1549 1500
No. of Different Words: 168 200
Fourth Root of Number of Words: 4.186 4.7
Average Word Length: 5.046 4.6
Word Length SD: 2.894 2.4
No. of Words greater than 5 chars: 109 100
No. of Words greater than 6 chars: 87 80
No. of Words greater than 7 chars: 63 40
No. of Words greater than 8 chars: 43 20
Use of Passive Voice (%): 0 0
Avg. Sentence Length: 21.929 21.0
Sentence Length SD: 9.075 7.5
Use of Discourse Markers (%): 0.643 0.12
Sentence-Text Coherence: 0.333 0.35
Sentence-Para Coherence: 0.55 0.50
Sentence-Sentence Coherence: 0.066 0.07
Number of Paragraphs: 4 5