The following appeared in a letter from the faculty committee to the president of Seatown University:
A study conducted at nearby Oceania University showed that faculty retention is higher when professors are offered free tuition at the university for their own college-aged children. Therefore, Seatown should institute a free-tuition policy for its professors for the purpose of enhancing morale among the faculty and luring new professors.
Write a response in which you discuss what specific evidence is needed to evaluate the argument and explain how the evidence would weaken or strengthen the argument.
The faculty comittee sent a letter to the president of the Seatown university to institute a free-tuition policy for the children of the professors to raise morale bring in more faculities. In support of their proposal they presented a study based near Ocenia University. But this proposal is based on several assumptions. before taking a decisions the merits of this assumptions need to be checked.
Firstly, the study was conducted at nearby the Ocenia University and the location of the university is not stated here. It might be in a different location thus can result in a decision which sounded favourable to the faculty committee. It is not wise just to take a decision based on a study which was conducted elsewhere in a probable different condition. Also, the number of people surveyed are not stated. Thus it does not give a comprehensive idea about the total opinion of the population. There is also this possibility that the faculty comittee might be trying to get more benefits from the university by stating the study.
Secondly, it is assumed that just by giving the tuition waver to the children of the professors will result in high morale and higher retention rate. The living condition and other facilities also have a very cruical impact here. It is possible that the living arrangement near the Ocenia University is very favourable to the professors there. Thus by insituting a tuition free program for their children resulted in higher retention rate. It might not be the same for the area where the Seatown University is situated. If it is in a remote are and devoid of necessary facilities like good transporation system and avaiability of supplies of daily needs, faciulties might not consider the arrangement inspite of having tuition-free program for their children.
Thirdly, it is assumed here that the professors will only become motivated by having free pass on their children college education. Although it is true that varsity fees have become very high and increasing rapidly, but the professor's priority might be different. If a professor have higher salary, favourable working condition, he might be more interested in the job. Because higher salary will enable him to support the fees of his children and favourable workplace condition will boost the interest in working. It has been seen in many management studies that favourable working condition results in higher retention rate.
By judging several underlying assumption of the proposal, it can be said that other factors like salary, living condition, research oppotunity should also be taken under consideration before making a decision about the proposal. Although offering a free-tuition promgram for the college-aged children for the professors has merit to increase morale and attracting new professors, but other options need to explroed before implementing this proposal as it will cost money from the university.
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- TOEFL T P O 12 - Integrated Writing Task 3
Comments
Essay evaluation report
Attribute Value Ideal
Final score: 3.5 out of 6
Category: Satisfactory Excellent
No. of Grammatical Errors: 0 2
No. of Spelling Errors: 0 2
No. of Sentences: 22 15
No. of Words: 470 350
No. of Characters: 2406 1500
No. of Different Words: 207 200
Fourth Root of Number of Words: 4.656 4.7
Average Word Length: 5.119 4.6
Word Length SD: 2.829 2.4
No. of Words greater than 5 chars: 188 100
No. of Words greater than 6 chars: 144 80
No. of Words greater than 7 chars: 109 40
No. of Words greater than 8 chars: 72 20
Use of Passive Voice (%): 0 0
Avg. Sentence Length: 21.364 21.0
Sentence Length SD: 7.696 7.5
Use of Discourse Markers (%): 0.682 0.12
Sentence-Text Coherence: 0.304 0.35
Sentence-Para Coherence: 0.518 0.50
Sentence-Sentence Coherence: 0.091 0.07
Number of Paragraphs: 5 5
Grammar and spelling errors:
Line 1, column 324, Rule ID: UPPERCASE_SENTENCE_START
Message: This sentence does not start with an uppercase letter
Suggestion: Before
...oposal is based on several assumptions. before taking a decisions the merits of this a...
^^^^^^
Line 1, column 324, Rule ID: SENTENCE_FRAGMENT[1]
Message: “before” at the beginning of a sentence requires a 2nd clause. Maybe a comma, question or exclamation mark is missing, or the sentence is incomplete and should be joined with the following sentence.
...oposal is based on several assumptions. before taking a decisions the merits of this a...
^^^^^^
Line 1, column 338, Rule ID: A_PLURAL[1]
Message: Don't use indefinite articles with plural words. Did you mean 'a decision' or simply 'decisions'?
Suggestion: a decision; decisions
...d on several assumptions. before taking a decisions the merits of this assumptions need to ...
^^^^^^^^^^^
Line 1, column 364, Rule ID: THIS_NNS[1]
Message: Did you mean 'these'?
Suggestion: these
...before taking a decisions the merits of this assumptions need to be checked. Fi...
^^^^
Line 4, column 411, Rule ID: SENT_START_CONJUNCTIVE_LINKING_ADVERB_COMMA[1]
Message: Did you forget a comma after a conjunctive/linking adverb?
Suggestion: Thus,
...mber of people surveyed are not stated. Thus it does not give a comprehensive idea a...
^^^^
Line 6, column 345, Rule ID: SENT_START_CONJUNCTIVE_LINKING_ADVERB_COMMA[1]
Message: Did you forget a comma after a conjunctive/linking adverb?
Suggestion: Thus,
...ery favourable to the professors there. Thus by insituting a tuition free program fo...
^^^^
Line 8, column 225, Rule ID: POSSESIVE_APOSTROPHE[1]
Message: Possible typo: apostrophe is missing. Did you mean 'professors'' or 'professor's'?
Suggestion: professors'; professor's
...ry high and increasing rapidly, but the professors priority might be different. If a profe...
^^^^^^^^^^
Transition Words or Phrases used:
also, but, first, firstly, if, second, secondly, so, third, thirdly, thus, it is true
Attributes: Values AverageValues Percentages(Values/AverageValues)% => Comments
Performance on Part of Speech:
To be verbs : 24.0 19.6327345309 122% => OK
Auxiliary verbs: 16.0 12.9520958084 124% => OK
Conjunction : 11.0 11.1786427146 98% => OK
Relative clauses : 10.0 13.6137724551 73% => More relative clauses wanted.
Pronoun: 31.0 28.8173652695 108% => OK
Preposition: 59.0 55.5748502994 106% => OK
Nominalization: 24.0 16.3942115768 146% => OK
Performance on vocabulary words:
No of characters: 2458.0 2260.96107784 109% => OK
No of words: 470.0 441.139720559 107% => OK
Chars per words: 5.22978723404 5.12650576532 102% => OK
Fourth root words length: 4.65612321451 4.56307096286 102% => OK
Word Length SD: 2.88973456686 2.78398813304 104% => OK
Unique words: 213.0 204.123752495 104% => OK
Unique words percentage: 0.453191489362 0.468620217663 97% => OK
syllable_count: 794.7 705.55239521 113% => OK
avg_syllables_per_word: 1.7 1.59920159681 106% => OK
A sentence (or a clause, phrase) starts by:
Pronoun: 9.0 4.96107784431 181% => OK
Article: 4.0 8.76447105788 46% => OK
Subordination: 6.0 2.70958083832 221% => Less adverbial clause wanted.
Conjunction: 3.0 1.67365269461 179% => OK
Preposition: 3.0 4.22255489022 71% => OK
Performance on sentences:
How many sentences: 23.0 19.7664670659 116% => OK
Sentence length: 20.0 22.8473053892 88% => OK
Sentence length SD: 55.4294456084 57.8364921388 96% => OK
Chars per sentence: 106.869565217 119.503703932 89% => OK
Words per sentence: 20.4347826087 23.324526521 88% => OK
Discourse Markers: 3.69565217391 5.70786347227 65% => OK
Paragraphs: 5.0 5.15768463074 97% => OK
Language errors: 7.0 5.25449101796 133% => OK
Sentences with positive sentiment : 13.0 8.20758483034 158% => OK
Sentences with negative sentiment : 2.0 6.88822355289 29% => More negative sentences wanted.
Sentences with neutral sentiment: 8.0 4.67664670659 171% => OK
What are sentences with positive/Negative/neutral sentiment?
Coherence and Cohesion:
Essay topic to essay body coherence: 0.265596449359 0.218282227539 122% => OK
Sentence topic coherence: 0.0750789569707 0.0743258471296 101% => OK
Sentence topic coherence SD: 0.0779364658582 0.0701772020484 111% => OK
Paragraph topic coherence: 0.146087262174 0.128457276422 114% => OK
Paragraph topic coherence SD: 0.0507955652721 0.0628817314937 81% => OK
Essay readability:
automated_readability_index: 13.4 14.3799401198 93% => Automated_readability_index is low.
flesch_reading_ease: 42.72 48.3550499002 88% => OK
smog_index: 8.8 7.1628742515 123% => OK
flesch_kincaid_grade: 12.3 12.197005988 101% => OK
coleman_liau_index: 13.05 12.5979740519 104% => OK
dale_chall_readability_score: 8.49 8.32208582834 102% => OK
difficult_words: 115.0 98.500998004 117% => OK
linsear_write_formula: 8.5 12.3882235529 69% => OK
gunning_fog: 10.0 11.1389221557 90% => OK
text_standard: 9.0 11.9071856287 76% => OK
What are above readability scores?
---------------------
Rates: 58.33 out of 100
Scores by essay e-grader: 3.5 Out of 6
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Note: the e-grader does NOT examine the meaning of words and ideas. VIP users will receive further evaluations by advanced module of e-grader and human graders.