Milk and dairy products are rich in vitamin D and calcium—substances essential for building and maintaining bones. Many people therefore say that a diet rich in dairy products can help prevent osteoporosis, a disease that is linked to both environmental and genetic factors and that causes the bones to weaken significantly with age. But a long-term study of a large number of people found that those who consistently consumed dairy products throughout the years of the study have a higher rate of bone fractures than any other participants in the study. Since bone fractures are symptomatic of osteoporosis, this study result shows that a diet rich in dairy products may actually increase, rather than decrease, the risk of osteoporosis.
Write a response in which you discuss what specific evidence is needed to evaluate the argument and explain how the evidence would weaken or strengthen the argument.
The were group of people consistantly consuming the dairy product may have the bone fraction.the authors aussumption by the research have saying boldly whom consuming the dairy product have facing osteoporosis. though the argument made to study for betterment of society.it may fail to achive goal because it if flawed.
the author aussomption being the more problems by the consuming the dairy.but there is no conclusive stament by whom or what environmental and genetic factors fall to fraction.it shold be correctly explanation for the convince of author ideas.the fractions are due to poor efficiency of vitamin D.but, the fraction may also cause due to accidents,means the symptoms of OS,is foolish.and majorly the football players and hockey have be fraction in the game it is not due to of it.if the fraction results of osteoporosis have not cogent way.
secondly,the the weaken of leags due to energy inefficiency.not the factor that consuming the dairy product or not to consuming.the bones neeed the rich vitamin D.the failure to supply of it willl cause to fraction and may firstaid of osteoporosis.being bracking or fracture it not to symptoms of OS.the author ausumption have to be evidencial data that to super impose the factor of OS.unless until with out proper evidence the authors aussumption not to be stated fully.
lastly,the author assumption the fraction are symptoms of OS,there dont mean that the consumption dairy products cause increase in OS.the author assumption are flawed.it need better result that may be the enironmental and genetic factors cause to fraction that result OS.without proper evidence simply stating the authors lines are inefficient.it needs more survey of it.
finally,the author assumption will powerful,when the type of study carried by whom and what makes the complte aussumption.unless the climatic and gentic will be the specific factor that symbolize the OS.so,it should poor ratify of authors assumption.
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2012-08-20 | RAJASEKHARREDDY | 40 | view |
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Sentence: secondly,the the weaken of leags due to energy inefficiency.not the factor that consuming the dairy product or not to consuming.the bones neeed the rich vitamin D.the failure to supply of it willl cause to fraction and may firstaid of osteoporosis.being bracking or fracture it not to symptoms of OS.the author ausumption have to be evidencial data that to super impose the factor of OS.unless until with out proper evidence the authors aussumption not to be stated fully.
Description: The token the is not usually followed by an article
Suggestion: Refer to the and the
Sentence: lastly,the author assumption the fraction are symptoms of OS,there dont mean that the consumption dairy products cause increase in OS.the author assumption are flawed.it need better result that may be the enironmental and genetic factors cause to fraction that result OS.without proper evidence simply stating the authors lines are inefficient.it needs more survey of it.
Description: A noun, plural, common is not usually followed by a noun, plural, common
Suggestion: Refer to authors and lines
Sentence: finally,the author assumption will powerful,when the type of study carried by whom and what makes the complte aussumption.unless the climatic and gentic will be the specific factor that symbolize the OS.so,it should poor ratify of authors assumption.
Description: The fragment will powerful , is rare
Suggestion: Possible agreement error: Replace powerful with adverb
Sentence: The were group of people consistantly consuming the dairy product may have the bone fraction.the authors aussumption by the research have saying boldly whom consuming the dairy product have facing osteoporosis. though the argument made to study for betterment of society.it may fail to achive goal because it if flawed.
Error: achive Suggestion: active
Error: consistantly Suggestion: No alternate word
Error: aussumption Suggestion: assumption
Sentence: the author aussomption being the more problems by the consuming the dairy.but there is no conclusive stament by whom or what environmental and genetic factors fall to fraction.it shold be correctly explanation for the convince of author ideas.the fractions are due to poor efficiency of vitamin D.but, the fraction may also cause due to accidents,means the symptoms of OS,is foolish.and majorly the football players and hockey have be fraction in the game it is not due to of it.if the fraction
Error: stament Suggestion: No alternate word
Error: aussomption Suggestion: assumption
Error: majorly Suggestion: major
Error: vitamin Suggestion: vital
Error: shold Suggestion: No alternate word
Sentence: secondly,the the weaken of leags due to energy inefficiency.not the factor that consuming.the dairy product or not to consuming.the bones neeed the rich vitamin D.the failure to supply of it willl cause to fraction and may firstaid of osteoporosis.being bracking or fracture it not to symptoms of OS.the author ausumption have to be evidencial data that to super impose the factor of OS.unless until with out proper evidence the authors aussumption not to be stated fully.
Error: willl Suggestion: wild
Error: firstaid Suggestion: No alternate word
Error: aussumption Suggestion: assumption
Error: ausumption Suggestion: assumption
Error: neeed Suggestion: need
Error: leags Suggestion: legs
Error: evidencial Suggestion: No alternate word
Error: vitamin Suggestion: vital
Error: bracking Suggestion: No alternate word
Sentence: lastly,the author assumption the fraction are symptoms of OS,there dont mean that the consumption dairy products cause increase in OS.the author assumption are flawed.it need better result that may be the enironmental and genetic factors cause to fraction that result OS.without proper evidence simply stating the authors lines are inefficient.it needs more survey of it.
Error: enironmental Suggestion: environmental
Sentence: finally,the author assumption will powerful,when the type of study carried by whom and what makes the complte aussumption.unless the climatic and gentic will be the specific factor that symbolize the OS.so,it should poor ratify of authors assumption.
Error: complte Suggestion: complete
Error: gentic Suggestion: genetic
flaws:
No. of Spelling Errors: 19 2 ( Be careful!)
No. of Different Words: 157 200
Use of Discourse Markers (%): 0.833 0.12
Attribute Value Ideal
Score: 3.0 out of 6
Category: Satisfactory Excellent
No. of Grammatical Errors: 3 2
No. of Spelling Errors: 19 2
No. of Sentences: 6 15
No. of Words: 317 350
No. of Characters: 1632 1500
No. of Different Words: 157 200
Fourth Root of Number of Words: 4.22 4.7
Average Word Length: 5.148 4.6
Word Length SD: 2.991 2.4
No. of Words greater than 5 chars: 125 100
No. of Words greater than 6 chars: 89 80
No. of Words greater than 7 chars: 66 40
No. of Words greater than 8 chars: 41 20
Use of Passive Voice (%): 0 0
Avg. Sentence Length: 52.833 21.0
Sentence Length SD: 25.648 7.5
Use of Discourse Markers (%): 0.833 0.12
Sentence-Text Coherence: 0.481 0.35
Sentence-Para Coherence: 0.875 0.50
Sentence-Sentence Coherence: 0.098 0.07
Number of Paragraphs: 5 5