For the successful development of the country, it is more important for a government to spend money on the education of every young children (five to ten years old) than to spend money on universities.
In today's progressive and sophisticated world where we live in, no one can turn a blind eye to the significance of children's education. In this regard, some are inclined toward the opinion that spending huge sums of money on five to ten years old kids ensures the success of every society. On the other extreme of the rope, others think that if governments in any country allocate sufficient budget for universities, their countries will become prosperous dramatically. Although both sides take their own positions, personally speaking, I firmly believe that the first group carries more weight. In the following paragraphs, I will cogently explain my reason to justify my viewpoints.
First of all, when great amounts of money are invested in learning kids, their mental and intellectual abilities will be developed remarkably, which affects the economic status of the society positively. In other words, by spending money on children's education such as hiring well-knowledge teachers for them, kids' knowledge will be developed considerably. In this situation, they learn how to think creatively, and they will be creative thinkers and expert problem solvers. Thus, when they enter the university, they are able to propose various new scientific theories, which leads the manufacturers utilize and apply them in industrial factories so as to save a lot of money and energy optimally. For example, since ten years ago, the Japanese have been exporting advanced industrial equipment to all over the world, increasing their total profit effectively. Because, in the past, they allocated great amounts of a budget for kids to learn different programming languages. Now, those children have been growing and inventing different technologies innovatively and improving economic situation progressively. Therefore, the more money is invested in kids' education, the more innovative teenagers will go to universities in the near future and the more profit the government can gain.
Secondly, by spending money on kids, their social abilities will be boosted significantly, which helps them to play a more productive role in their societies in the near future. To be more specific, if governments assign sufficient budget to employ skillful teachers to teach children to cooperate and collaborate kindly with each other in accomplishing projects, several productive individuals will be reared, who are able to fulfill their tasks and duties appropriately in their future jobs. For instance, when I was an elementary student, our teacher taught us how to communicate friendly with other students to gain each one’s valuable experiences and new insights. Some years later, working in a factory, I could communicate effectively with my colleagues, helping me deal efficiently with different problems and unprecedented challenges in my workplace and improving the revenue of that factory. Thus, if the government had not allocated money for hiring knowledgeable educators, students neither could develop their social abilities nor affect the economy positively.
In conclusion, I strongly believe that investing money in educating kids is more beneficial for the country. Not only does it extend their knowledge and lead them to become innovative and intelligence individuals in the near future, but it also teaches them to make a consistent and constructive relationship with others in order to work effectively with them and cope with any obstacles in their jobs, which improves the economy status undoubtedly.
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Grammar and spelling errors:
Line 2, column 648, Rule ID: SO_AS_TO[1]
Message: Use simply 'to'
Suggestion: to
... and apply them in industrial factories so as to save a lot of money and energy optimall...
^^^^^^^^
Transition Words or Phrases used:
also, but, first, if, second, secondly, so, therefore, thus, well, as to, for example, for instance, in conclusion, such as, first of all, in other words
Attributes: Values AverageValues Percentages(Values/AverageValues)% => Comments
Performance on Part of Speech:
To be verbs : 15.0 15.1003584229 99% => OK
Auxiliary verbs: 12.0 9.8082437276 122% => OK
Conjunction : 20.0 13.8261648746 145% => OK
Relative clauses : 14.0 11.0286738351 127% => OK
Pronoun: 45.0 43.0788530466 104% => OK
Preposition: 73.0 52.1666666667 140% => OK
Nominalization: 11.0 8.0752688172 136% => OK
Performance on vocabulary words:
No of characters: 2965.0 1977.66487455 150% => OK
No of words: 540.0 407.700716846 132% => OK
Chars per words: 5.49074074074 4.8611393121 113% => OK
Fourth root words length: 4.82057051367 4.48103885553 108% => OK
Word Length SD: 3.06617626693 2.67179642975 115% => OK
Unique words: 293.0 212.727598566 138% => OK
Unique words percentage: 0.542592592593 0.524837075471 103% => OK
syllable_count: 932.4 618.680645161 151% => OK
avg_syllables_per_word: 1.7 1.51630824373 112% => OK
A sentence (or a clause, phrase) starts by:
Pronoun: 12.0 9.59856630824 125% => OK
Article: 3.0 3.08781362007 97% => OK
Subordination: 7.0 3.51792114695 199% => OK
Conjunction: 2.0 1.86738351254 107% => OK
Preposition: 12.0 4.94265232975 243% => Less preposition wanted as sentence beginnings.
Performance on sentences:
How many sentences: 20.0 20.6003584229 97% => OK
Sentence length: 27.0 20.1344086022 134% => The Avg. Sentence Length is relatively long.
Sentence length SD: 62.9320864107 48.9658058833 129% => OK
Chars per sentence: 148.25 100.406767564 148% => OK
Words per sentence: 27.0 20.6045352989 131% => OK
Discourse Markers: 7.65 5.45110844103 140% => OK
Paragraphs: 4.0 4.53405017921 88% => OK
Language errors: 1.0 5.5376344086 18% => OK
Sentences with positive sentiment : 17.0 11.8709677419 143% => OK
Sentences with negative sentiment : 0.0 3.85842293907 0% => More negative sentences wanted.
Sentences with neutral sentiment: 3.0 4.88709677419 61% => OK
What are sentences with positive/Negative/neutral sentiment?
Coherence and Cohesion:
Essay topic to essay body coherence: 0.272481076343 0.236089414692 115% => OK
Sentence topic coherence: 0.0847618686333 0.076458572812 111% => OK
Sentence topic coherence SD: 0.0819088005756 0.0737576698707 111% => OK
Paragraph topic coherence: 0.166368722555 0.150856017488 110% => OK
Paragraph topic coherence SD: 0.0598413784349 0.0645574589148 93% => OK
Essay readability:
automated_readability_index: 17.9 11.7677419355 152% => OK
flesch_reading_ease: 35.61 58.1214874552 61% => OK
smog_index: 11.2 6.10430107527 183% => OK
flesch_kincaid_grade: 15.0 10.1575268817 148% => OK
coleman_liau_index: 14.86 10.9000537634 136% => OK
dale_chall_readability_score: 9.71 8.01818996416 121% => OK
difficult_words: 162.0 86.8835125448 186% => OK
linsear_write_formula: 11.0 10.002688172 110% => OK
gunning_fog: 12.8 10.0537634409 127% => OK
text_standard: 15.0 10.247311828 146% => OK
What are above readability scores?
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Better to have 5 paragraphs with 3 arguments. And try always support/against one side but compare two sides, like this:
para 1: introduction
para 2: reason 1. address both of the views presented for reason 1
para 3: reason 2. address both of the views presented for reason 2
para 4: reason 3. address both of the views presented for reason 3
para 5: conclusion.
So how to find out those reasons. There is a formula:
reasons == advantages or
reasons == disadvantages
for example, we can always apply 'save time', 'save/make money', 'find a job', 'make friends', 'get more information' as reasons to all essay/speaking topics.
or we can apply 'waste time', 'waste money', 'no job', 'make bad friends', 'get bad information' as reasons to all essay/speaking topics.
Rates: 90.0 out of 100
Scores by essay e-grader: 27.0 Out of 30
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Note: the e-grader does NOT examine the meaning of words and ideas. VIP users will receive further evaluations by advanced module of e-grader and human graders.