The author concludes that Omega University should abolish the student evaluation system of professors. To bolster this assertion, the author points out that since Omega University adopted the student evaluation system of professors, student grade averages have risen by 30 percent and Omega University graduates have not succeeded to get jobs compared to Alpha University graduates. However, the argument is not wholly convincing as it stands due to its logical flaws in several critical respects.
First, there is no evidence that the increase of students’ grades is affected by the new evaluation procedure. During fifteen years, the students’ abilities might be better indeed than those in the past, in which the evaluation were not existed. Besides, the learning environments of Omega University for their students, such as a library, a student support service, and an online education service, might have been improved so that it could give students a lot of motivation to study hard. Also, the professors might have taught their students in a advanced way regardless of the evaluation system. In this regard, it is difficult to maintain that the overall student grade averages are increased because the new evaluation system of professors induced the professors to assign higher grades in their classes.
Second, the author commits an error of generalization by assuming that the potential employers’ opinion represents all employers. If the potential employers are people in companies that hired Alpha University graduates, they might have lopsided opinions about these graduates. Even assuming that they evaluate evenly graduates from both universities, their opinion could not be regarded as representative perspective since they assume that grades is the only criterion for hiring graduates, excluding other aspects, such as personality, relevant experience, aptitudes, or attitudes.
Finally, the argument above is weakened by the fact that it does not take into account the difference between Omega University graduates and Alpha University graduates. The graduates from Alpha University might be more successful in getting jobs if the social reputation of Alpha University is much higher than those of Omega University. On the other hand, it could be an error to assume all graduates go to job markets. According to this aspect, most of the Omega University graduates might enter graduate schools rather than get jobs. Even if the author’s assumption that less graduates of Omega University have gotten jobs than Alpha University graduates is true, their average salary might be higher than those of Alpha University graduates.
In conclusion, the author’s argument relies on a series of unsubstantiated assumptions, and is therefore unconvincing as it stands. To justify this argument, the author should provide sufficient evidence and information that will eliminate all the above doubtful questions. Then, the argument can be completely well reasoned.
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argument 1 -- OK
argument 2 -- not OK.
argument 3 -- OK
----------------
flaws:
Need to argue against the conclusion:
'To enable its graduates to secure better jobs, Omega University should terminate student evaluation of professors.'
Attribute Value Ideal
Score: 3.5 out of 6
Category: Satisfactory Excellent
No. of Grammatical Errors: 0 2
No. of Spelling Errors: 0 2
No. of Sentences: 19 15
No. of Words: 453 350
No. of Characters: 2460 1500
No. of Different Words: 215 200
Fourth Root of Number of Words: 4.613 4.7
Average Word Length: 5.43 4.6
Word Length SD: 2.81 2.4
No. of Words greater than 5 chars: 196 100
No. of Words greater than 6 chars: 156 80
No. of Words greater than 7 chars: 120 40
No. of Words greater than 8 chars: 84 20
Use of Passive Voice (%): 0 0
Avg. Sentence Length: 23.842 21.0
Sentence Length SD: 9.466 7.5
Use of Discourse Markers (%): 0.684 0.12
Sentence-Text Coherence: 0.344 0.35
Sentence-Para Coherence: 0.594 0.50
Sentence-Sentence Coherence: 0.124 0.07
Number of Paragraphs: 5 5