The line chart compares thefts per 1000 vehicles in four different countries (Great Britain, Sweden, France, Canada) from 1990 to 1999. It is clear that The United Kingdom was the nation with the highest number of thefts during the period and there was a downward trend except for the Sweden’s trend.
The downward trend was can be seen for The UK, France, and Sweden during the period although the UK’s figure was far higher than the other two figures. The number of thefts in Great Britain was at between 10 to 15 thefts whereas France’s figure and Canada’s figure were at between 5 to 10 thefts. France’s figure started from almost 10 thefts per 1000 vehicles in 1990 to only 6 thefts in 1999. A similar pattern was found for Canada’s figure. Although the Canada’s figure gradually increased from 5 in 1993 to 6 thefts in 1999, generally Canada’s trend could be classified as a downward trend.
Different from the other three countries, where the number of thefts tends to decrease, Sweden’s figure jumped significantly from only 6 thefts in 1990 to 14 thefts in 1999. This significant increase shifted Sweden as a country with the least number of thefts from the bottom to the second country with the highest number of thefts after The UK.
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You need to work more on task
You need to work more on task I. Your current level for task I is: 5.5, task II: 6.5, total: 6.0 out of 9.
The best way to practice task I:
First, read one essay by one of the following users, then write this essay too, and compare and contrast how they write the essay. You can apply their sentences or words to other of your essays.
http://testbig.com/users/dilbar
http://www.testbig.com/users/mrmo2610
http://www.testbig.com/users/xthangbm
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Sentence: The downward trend was can be seen for The UK, France, and Sweden during the period although the UK's figure was far higher than the other two figures.
Description: The token was is not usually followed by a modal auxillary
Suggestion: Refer to was and can
flaws:
don't repeat words, like:
there was a downward trend except for the Sweden’s trend.
The downward trend was can be seen for The UK...
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read the graphs carefully:
The number of thefts in Great Britain was at between 10 to 15 thefts
The number of thefts in Great Britain was at between 15 to 20 thefts
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Don't need list countries:
(Great Britain, Sweden, France, Canada)
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You didn't develop well for car thefts in Great Britain. compare and read the sample:
http://www.testbig.com/ielts-writing-task-i-essays/line-graph-shows-the…
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Attribute Value Ideal
Score: 5.5 out of 9
Category: Satisfactory Excellent
No. of Grammatical Errors: 1 2
No. of Spelling Errors: 0 2
No. of Sentences: 9 10
No. of Words: 216 200
No. of Characters: 1007 1000
No. of Different Words: 99 100
Fourth Root of Number of Words: 3.834 4.0
Average Word Length: 4.662 4.6
Word Length SD: 2.279 2.4
No. of Words greater than 5 chars: 86 60
No. of Words greater than 6 chars: 43 50
No. of Words greater than 7 chars: 28 40
No. of Words greater than 8 chars: 10 20
Use of Passive Voice (%): 0 0
Avg. Sentence Length: 24 21.0
Sentence Length SD: 6.864 7.5
Use of Discourse Markers (%): 0.333 0.12
Sentence-Text Coherence: 0.513 0.35
Sentence-Para Coherence: 0.651 0.50
Sentence-Sentence Coherence: 0.194 0.07
Number of Paragraphs: 3 4