The following appeared in as part of a petition sent to residents of Youngtown by an environmental protection group:
The Smith Corporation should not be permitted to develop the land that is now the part of the Youngtown Wildlife Preserve. This sanctuary is essential to the survival of 300 birds species that live in that area.Although only a small percentage of the land will be sold to Smith ,the proposed development will have a disastrous consequence for our area.The company plans to build a small hotel on the land.Although they have promised to ensure the preservation of the sanctuary,there is no way that their plans will do anything but harm the sanctuary.There are no circumstances under which the sale will benefit our community, which relies on tourist who visit primarily to see our magnificent bird population.
Author of the petition is from an envoirmental protection group requesting the resident of the Youngtown to stand with them against the Simth Corporation who want to buy a small part of land of the Young Wildlife Preserve which is the habitat of 300 bird species to build a hotel there.Authors claims that eventhough the company promises to protect the sanctuary there is no chance by which fullfill their promise.Although protecting sanctuary is most important but author here has failed to consider number of aspects which result in not giving a clear picture to the redisdent.
Firstly, Author has said that a small percentage of the land is being sold to Smith Corporation but he has not mention the what percentage of land the company is buying and how much area of the Sanctuary it sums to. If the company is buying less than 5 percent of the Sanctuary which is very less and the birds species can be easily protected.Thus mention the percentage or the area will make more the idea more clear.
Secondly,the author mentioned that the Smith Corporation is promising to protect the sanctuary. Author did not take efforts to know how the company will do that and jump to the conclusion that there are no way the santcuary will be protect if the hotel is built. So the author should first know all the ways the company will save the sanctuary and then make a conclusion whether the santcuary can be saved or not. As we all know a private organisation can protect the santcuary in more better ways than a public organisation.
Author states that the Youngtown is also benifited as this bird sanctuary is an tourist places and many tourist are come to see the manificent bird population.Constructing hotel in front of this magnificient bird sanctuary can even profit the Youngtown by earning more revenues form the Hotel taxes.This point completely contradict that the hotel can not profit Youngtown.
Thus author should mention all the aspects in the petition mentioned above and they claim that the hotel will be beneficial to Youngtown or not. Author should mention the area which the company is buying ,the ways the company promises to the save the the sanctuary and the monetary benefits it will bring to the Youngtown.Saving bird sanctuary is most important concern but earing more money with affecting them is not wrong.
| Post date | Users | Rates | Link to Content |
|---|---|---|---|
| 2016-07-29 | kcdbeck@gmail.com | 50 | view |
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Grammar and spelling errors:
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Message: Possible typo: you repeated a whitespace
Suggestion:
Author of the petition is from an envoir...
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Suggestion: Authors
...300 bird species to build a hotel there.Authors claims that eventhough the company prom...
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Suggestion: Although
... chance by which fullfill their promise.Although protecting sanctuary is most important ...
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Line 2, column 1, Rule ID: WHITESPACE_RULE
Message: Possible typo: you repeated a whitespace
Suggestion:
...ving a clear picture to the redisdent. Firstly, Author has said that a small pe...
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Line 2, column 165, Rule ID: HAVE_PART_AGREEMENT[2]
Message: Possible agreement error -- use past participle here: 'mentioned'.
Suggestion: mentioned
...old to Smith Corporation but he has not mention the what percentage of land the company...
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Line 2, column 358, Rule ID: POSSESIVE_APOSTROPHE[1]
Message: Possible typo: apostrophe is missing. Did you mean 'birds'' or 'bird's'?
Suggestion: birds'; bird's
...he Sanctuary which is very less and the birds species can be easily protected.Thus me...
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Suggestion: Thus
...e birds species can be easily protected.Thus mention the percentage or the area will...
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Line 3, column 1, Rule ID: WHITESPACE_RULE
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...a will make more the idea more clear. Secondly,the author mentioned that the S...
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Suggestion: , the
... Secondly,the author mentioned that the Smith Corpora...
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Line 3, column 110, Rule ID: PROGRESSIVE_VERBS[1]
Message: This verb is normally not used in the progressive form. Try a simple form instead.
...or mentioned that the Smith Corporation is promising to protect the sanctuary. Author did no...
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Line 3, column 467, Rule ID: SENTENCE_FRAGMENT[1]
Message: “As” at the beginning of a sentence requires a 2nd clause. Maybe a comma, question or exclamation mark is missing, or the sentence is incomplete and should be joined with the following sentence.
...ther the santcuary can be saved or not. As we all know a private organisation can ...
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Line 3, column 534, Rule ID: MOST_COMPARATIVE[2]
Message: Use only 'better' (without 'more') when you use the comparative.
Suggestion: better
...ganisation can protect the santcuary in more better ways than a public organisation. ...
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Line 4, column 1, Rule ID: WHITESPACE_RULE
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...etter ways than a public organisation. Author states that the Youngtown is also...
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Line 4, column 130, Rule ID: EN_A_VS_AN
Message: Use 'a' instead of 'an' if the following word doesn't start with a vowel sound, e.g. 'a sentence', 'a university'
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...lso benifited as this bird sanctuary is an tourist places and many tourist are com...
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Suggestion: Constructing
...e to see the manificent bird population.Constructing hotel in front of this magnificient bir...
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Suggestion: This
...ning more revenues form the Hotel taxes.This point completely contradict that the ho...
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Line 6, column 1, Rule ID: WHITESPACE_RULE
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Suggestion:
... the hotel can not profit Youngtown. Thus author should mention all the aspec...
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Line 6, column 258, Rule ID: COMMA_PARENTHESIS_WHITESPACE
Message: Put a space after the comma, but not before the comma
Suggestion: ,
...ion the area which the company is buying ,the ways the company promises to the sav...
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Line 6, column 302, Rule ID: ENGLISH_WORD_REPEAT_RULE
Message: Possible typo: you repeated a word
Suggestion: the
...e ways the company promises to the save the the sanctuary and the monetary benefits it ...
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Line 6, column 302, Rule ID: DT_DT[1]
Message: Maybe you need to remove one determiner so that only 'the' or 'the' is left.
Suggestion: the; the
...e ways the company promises to the save the the sanctuary and the monetary benefits it ...
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Line 6, column 377, Rule ID: SENTENCE_WHITESPACE
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Suggestion: Saving
...benefits it will bring to the Youngtown.Saving bird sanctuary is most important concer...
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Line 7, column 1, Rule ID: WHITESPACE_RULE
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Suggestion:
...oney with affecting them is not wrong.
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Discourse Markers used:
['also', 'but', 'first', 'firstly', 'if', 'second', 'secondly', 'so', 'then', 'thus']
Attributes: Values AverageValues Percentages(Values/AverageValues)% => Comments
Performance in Part of Speech:
Nouns: 0.25304136253 0.25644967241 99% => OK
Verbs: 0.194647201946 0.15541462614 125% => OK
Adjectives: 0.0656934306569 0.0836205057962 79% => OK
Adverbs: 0.0486618004866 0.0520304965353 94% => OK
Pronouns: 0.0194647201946 0.0272364105082 71% => OK
Prepositions: 0.0924574209246 0.125424944231 74% => OK
Participles: 0.043795620438 0.0416121511921 105% => OK
Conjunctions: 2.87240253855 2.79052419416 103% => OK
Infinitives: 0.036496350365 0.026700313972 137% => OK
Particles: 0.0 0.001811407834 0% => OK
Determiners: 0.155717761557 0.113004496875 138% => OK
Modal_auxiliary: 0.0340632603406 0.0255425247493 133% => OK
WH_determiners: 0.021897810219 0.0127820249294 171% => OK
Vocabulary words and sentences:
No of characters: 2645.0 2731.13054187 97% => OK
No of words: 397.0 446.07635468 89% => OK
Chars per words: 6.66246851385 6.12365571057 109% => OK
Fourth root words length: 4.46372701284 4.57801047555 98% => OK
words length more than 5 chars: 0.32241813602 0.378187486979 85% => OK
words length more than 6 chars: 0.241813602015 0.287650121315 84% => OK
words length more than 7 chars: 0.166246851385 0.208842608468 80% => OK
words length more than 8 chars: 0.133501259446 0.135150697306 99% => OK
Word Length SD: 2.87240253855 2.79052419416 103% => OK
Unique words: 173.0 207.018472906 84% => More unique words wanted.
Unique words percentage: 0.435768261965 0.469332199767 93% => OK
Word variations: 46.035242376 52.1807786196 88% => OK
How many sentences: 10.0 20.039408867 50% => More sentences wanted.
Sentence length: 39.7 23.2022227129 171% => OK
Sentence length SD: 155.134651191 57.7814097925 268% => The lengths of sentences changed so frequently.
Chars per sentence: 264.5 141.986410481 186% => Less chars per sentence wanted.
Words per sentence: 39.7 23.2022227129 171% => OK
Discourse Markers: 1.0 0.724660767414 138% => OK
Paragraphs: 5.0 5.14285714286 97% => OK
Language errors: 22.0 3.58251231527 614% => Correct essay format wanted or double check grammar & spelling issues after essay writing.
Readability: 63.8813602015 51.9672348444 123% => OK
Elegance: 1.48148148148 1.8405768891 80% => OK
Coherence and Cohesion:
Essay topic to essay body coherence: 0.646356360913 0.441005458295 147% => OK
Sentence sentence coherence: 0.276282620021 0.135418324435 204% => Sentence is so close to another sentence.
Sentence sentence coherence SD: 0.0868827650017 0.0829849096947 105% => OK
Sentence paragraph coherence: 0.803472276069 0.58762219726 137% => OK
Sentence paragraph coherence SD: 0.153967229708 0.147661913831 104% => OK
Sentence topic coherence: 0.375609964091 0.193483328276 194% => OK
Sentence topic coherence SD: 0.115249376017 0.0970749176394 119% => OK
Paragraph paragraph coherence: 0.484679080989 0.42659136922 114% => OK
Paragraph paragraph coherence SD: 0.0749730197061 0.0774707102158 97% => OK
Paragraph topic coherence: 0.470435235607 0.312017818177 151% => OK
Paragraph topic coherence SD: 0.0682923067591 0.0698173142475 98% => OK
Task Achievement:
Sentences with positive sentiment : 8.0 8.33743842365 96% => OK
Sentences with negative sentiment : 1.0 6.87684729064 15% => More negative sentences wanted.
Sentences with neutral sentiment: 1.0 4.82512315271 21% => More neutral sentences wanted.
Positive topic words: 6.0 6.46551724138 93% => OK
Negative topic words: 1.0 5.36822660099 19% => More negative topic words wanted.
Neutral topic words: 1.0 2.82389162562 35% => OK
Total topic words: 8.0 14.657635468 55% => OK
What are sentences with positive/Negative/neutral sentiment?
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Rates: 50.0 out of 100
Scores by essay e-grader: 3.0 Out of 6 -- The score is based on the average performance of 20,000 argument essays. This e-grader is not smart enough to check on arguments.
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Note: the e-grader does NOT examine the meaning of words and ideas. VIP users will receive further evaluations by advanced module of e-grader and human graders.