Some people believe that a government's responsibility should provide care and financial support for people after they retire. Other said that people should help themselves. Do you agree or disagree, and what is your opinion?

The two pie charts illustrate the changes in household spending in United Kimgdom between 1971 and 2001 years. It can be obviously seen that, Cars, Foods, and Books are included in 2001 as an additional habit. Moreover it should be mentioned that there was dramatic change over period of 3 decades.
According to the first pie chart, in 1971, British people spent 36% on Petrol, which was the highest percentage among the given categories. Furniture maintained its position at the second largest, which was followed by Restaurants, at precisely 25%. Computers positioned at the end of this chart, at 7%.
When it comes to second pie chart, in here Cars was domain, which was followed by Foods and Restaurants. It is vital to noted that Restaurants has shown a downward trend , decreased by 9%. Although Furniture and Petrol declined significantly, they showed the same patterns during 30 years. Contrast to other household spendings , Computers improved by 5 per cent. Finally, the least preferable spending was Books, at 1%

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Average: 1.1 (1 vote)
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IELTS Writing Task I - IELTS Academic
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Grammar and spelling errors:
Line 1, column 211, Rule ID: SENT_START_CONJUNCTIVE_LINKING_ADVERB_COMMA[1]
Message: Did you forget a comma after a conjunctive/linking adverb?
Suggestion: Moreover,
...ncluded in 2001 as an additional habit. Moreover it should be mentioned that there was d...
^^^^^^^^
Line 3, column 169, Rule ID: COMMA_PARENTHESIS_WHITESPACE
Message: Put a space after the comma, but not before the comma
Suggestion: ,
...t Restaurants has shown a downward trend , decreased by 9%. Although Furniture and...
^^
Line 3, column 327, Rule ID: COMMA_PARENTHESIS_WHITESPACE
Message: Put a space after the comma, but not before the comma
Suggestion: ,
...s. Contrast to other household spendings , Computers improved by 5 per cent. Final...
^^

Transition Words or Phrases used:
finally, first, if, moreover, second

Attributes: Values AverageValues Percentages(Values/AverageValues)% => Comments

Performance on Part of Speech:
To be verbs : 10.0 7.0 143% => OK
Auxiliary verbs: 2.0 1.00243902439 200% => OK
Conjunction : 4.0 6.8 59% => More conjunction wanted.
Relative clauses : 7.0 3.15609756098 222% => Less relative clauses wanted (maybe 'which' is over used).
Pronoun: 10.0 5.60731707317 178% => Less pronouns wanted
Preposition: 25.0 33.7804878049 74% => OK
Nominalization: 1.0 3.97073170732 25% => More nominalizations (nouns with a suffix like: tion ment ence ance) wanted.

Performance on vocabulary words:
No of characters: 857.0 965.302439024 89% => OK
No of words: 168.0 196.424390244 86% => More content wanted.
Chars per words: 5.10119047619 4.92477711251 104% => OK
Fourth root words length: 3.60020574368 3.73543355544 96% => OK
Word Length SD: 2.76846427892 2.65546596893 104% => OK
Unique words: 119.0 106.607317073 112% => OK
Unique words percentage: 0.708333333333 0.547539520022 129% => OK
syllable_count: 241.2 283.868780488 85% => OK
avg_syllables_per_word: 1.4 1.45097560976 96% => OK

A sentence (or a clause, phrase) starts by:
Pronoun: 3.0 1.53170731707 196% => OK
Article: 2.0 4.33902439024 46% => OK
Subordination: 2.0 1.07073170732 187% => OK
Conjunction: 1.0 0.482926829268 207% => Less conjunction wanted as sentence beginning.
Preposition: 6.0 3.36585365854 178% => OK

Performance on sentences:
How many sentences: 11.0 8.94146341463 123% => OK
Sentence length: 15.0 22.4926829268 67% => The Avg. Sentence Length is relatively short.
Sentence length SD: 24.1472753968 43.030603864 56% => The essay contains lots of sentences with the similar length. More sentence varieties wanted.
Chars per sentence: 77.9090909091 112.824112599 69% => OK
Words per sentence: 15.2727272727 22.9334400587 67% => OK
Discourse Markers: 3.27272727273 5.23603664747 63% => OK
Paragraphs: 3.0 3.83414634146 78% => More paragraphs wanted.
Language errors: 3.0 1.69756097561 177% => OK
Sentences with positive sentiment : 3.0 3.70975609756 81% => OK
Sentences with negative sentiment : 0.0 1.13902439024 0% => More negative sentences wanted.
Sentences with neutral sentiment: 8.0 4.09268292683 195% => OK
What are sentences with positive/Negative/neutral sentiment?

Coherence and Cohesion:
Essay topic to essay body coherence: 0.0433291681027 0.215688989381 20% => OK
Sentence topic coherence: 0.016025929632 0.103423049105 15% => OK
Sentence topic coherence SD: 0.0235320480192 0.0843802449381 28% => Sentences are similar to each other.
Paragraph topic coherence: 0.0281340975601 0.15604864568 18% => OK
Paragraph topic coherence SD: 0.00516505540763 0.0819641961636 6% => Paragraphs are similar to each other. Some content may get duplicated or it is not exactly right on the topic.

Essay readability:
automated_readability_index: 10.2 13.2329268293 77% => Automated_readability_index is low.
flesch_reading_ease: 73.17 61.2550243902 119% => OK
smog_index: 3.1 6.51609756098 48% => Smog_index is low.
flesch_kincaid_grade: 6.8 10.3012195122 66% => OK
coleman_liau_index: 11.71 11.4140731707 103% => OK
dale_chall_readability_score: 8.89 8.06136585366 110% => OK
difficult_words: 48.0 40.7170731707 118% => OK
linsear_write_formula: 8.0 11.4329268293 70% => OK
gunning_fog: 8.0 10.9970731707 73% => OK
text_standard: 8.0 11.0658536585 72% => OK
What are above readability scores?

---------------------
It is not exactly right on the topic in the view of e-grader. Maybe there is a wrong essay topic.

Rates: 11.2359550562 out of 100
Scores by essay e-grader: 1.0 Out of 9
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Note: the e-grader does NOT examine the meaning of words and ideas. VIP users will receive further evaluations by advanced module of e-grader and human graders.