The following appeared in a memo at XYZ company.
"When XYZ lays off employees, it pays Delany Personnel Firm to offer those employees assistance in creating résumés and developing interviewing skills, if they so desire. Laid-off employees have benefited greatly from Delany's services: last year those who used Delany found jobs much more quickly than did those who did not. Recently, it has been proposed that we use the less expensive Walsh Personnel Firm in place of Delany. This would be a mistake because eight years ago, when XYZ was using Walsh, only half of the workers we laid off at that time found jobs within a year. Moreover, Delany is clearly superior, as evidenced by its bigger staff and larger number of branch offices. After all, last year Delany's clients took an average of six months to find jobs, whereas Walsh's clients took nine."
Write a response in which you discuss what specific evidence is needed to evaluate the argument and explain how the evidence would weaken or strengthen the argument.
this argument is based on the recommendation made in a memo at the xyz company that xyz should continue to use delany instead of walsh as its personnel service for helping laid-off xyz employees in finding new jobs. According to the speaker, last year xyz employees using delany services found jobs much more quickly than those who did not, and the average delany client found a job in 6 months, compared to 9 months for the average walsh client. The argument is based on many assumptions and there is no evidence given in support of these assumptions.
First of all, the author has said that laid-off employees have benefited greatly from delany's services. those employees who used delany found jobs much more quickly than those who did not. however, the author fails to mention the quality of jobs they got. More people finding jobs quickly does not reveal job satisfaction and salary. The author has not given any evidence in support of his assumption that the employees have greatly benefited from delany's services.
The next evidence cited by the author is comparison of walsh personal Firm's services with that of delany's on the basis of its placement rate eight years ago. walsh's prior rate of placing laid-off xyz employees is not a reliable indicator of its performance at present. there might be some other factor like economic slow down, which is not under walsh's control behind the low placement rate 8 years ago. Moreover, the author cannot say with surety that at present delany is better than walsh based on eight years old records. The author has not provided any such data.
Further, the author claims that last year delany's clients took an average of six months to find jobs, whereas walsh's clients took nine months. however, he has not discussed about the price difference of delany and walsh. he has also not mentioned about the job satisfaction of the clients and the salary they got. Therefore, without considering and ruling out these factors, the author cannot conclude the argument.
In the last, the author commits a fallacy of ungrounded assumption. As per the author, delany is superior as it has a bigger staff and many branch offices. however, he forgot to mention the efficiency of the staff. Although delany has a big staff, the efficiency of the staff might be quite low. it is right that delany has large number of branch offices, but locations of those offices are not mentioned. If these offices are located far from the center of the city, then they might not be good for finding good jobs. Hence, this point also does not justify the author's recommendation.
In short, the author has made hasty conclusions. The memo's author should have provided better evidence like from xyz's records, he could have got the data to prove that delany's services have consistently helped laid-off xyz employees find jobs. instead of comparing walsh and delany based on 8 years old records, the author should have provided better evidence.
Comments
Essay evaluation report
Attribute Value Ideal
Final score: 4.0 out of 6
Category: Good Excellent
No. of Grammatical Errors: 0 2
No. of Spelling Errors: 0 2
No. of Sentences: 18 15
No. of Words: 502 350
No. of Characters: 2413 1500
No. of Different Words: 204 200
Fourth Root of Number of Words: 4.733 4.7
Average Word Length: 4.807 4.6
Word Length SD: 2.37 2.4
No. of Words greater than 5 chars: 177 100
No. of Words greater than 6 chars: 122 80
No. of Words greater than 7 chars: 72 40
No. of Words greater than 8 chars: 37 20
Use of Passive Voice (%): 0 0
Avg. Sentence Length: 27.889 21.0
Sentence Length SD: 17.565 7.5
Use of Discourse Markers (%): 0.5 0.12
Sentence-Text Coherence: 0.373 0.35
Sentence-Para Coherence: 0.6 0.50
Sentence-Sentence Coherence: 0.15 0.07
Number of Paragraphs: 6 5
Grammar and spelling errors:
Line 1, column 1, Rule ID: UPPERCASE_SENTENCE_START
Message: This sentence does not start with an uppercase letter
Suggestion: This
this argument is based on the recommendation...
^^^^
Line 3, column 105, Rule ID: UPPERCASE_SENTENCE_START
Message: This sentence does not start with an uppercase letter
Suggestion: Those
...enefited greatly from delanys services. those employees who used delany found jobs mu...
^^^^^
Line 3, column 190, Rule ID: UPPERCASE_SENTENCE_START
Message: This sentence does not start with an uppercase letter
Suggestion: However
...ch more quickly than those who did not. however, the author fails to mention the qualit...
^^^^^^^
Line 5, column 159, Rule ID: UPPERCASE_SENTENCE_START
Message: This sentence does not start with an uppercase letter
Suggestion: Walshs
... of its placement rate eight years ago. walshs prior rate of placing laid-off xyz empl...
^^^^^^
Line 5, column 270, Rule ID: UPPERCASE_SENTENCE_START
Message: This sentence does not start with an uppercase letter
Suggestion: There
...ndicator of its performance at present. there might be some other factor like economi...
^^^^^
Line 7, column 144, Rule ID: UPPERCASE_SENTENCE_START
Message: This sentence does not start with an uppercase letter
Suggestion: However
...hereas walshs clients took nine months. however, he has not discussed about the price d...
^^^^^^^
Line 7, column 222, Rule ID: UPPERCASE_SENTENCE_START
Message: This sentence does not start with an uppercase letter
Suggestion: He
...e price difference of delany and walsh. he has also not mentioned about the job sa...
^^
Line 9, column 157, Rule ID: UPPERCASE_SENTENCE_START
Message: This sentence does not start with an uppercase letter
Suggestion: However
...a bigger staff and many branch offices. however, he forgot to mention the efficiency of...
^^^^^^^
Line 9, column 297, Rule ID: UPPERCASE_SENTENCE_START
Message: This sentence does not start with an uppercase letter
Suggestion: It
...ciency of the staff might be quite low. it is right that delany has large number o...
^^
Line 9, column 564, Rule ID: POSSESIVE_APOSTROPHE[2]
Message: Possible typo: apostrophe is missing. Did you mean 'authors'' or 'author's'?
Suggestion: authors'; author's
...e, this point also does not justify the authors recommendation. In short, the author...
^^^^^^^
Line 11, column 245, Rule ID: UPPERCASE_SENTENCE_START
Message: This sentence does not start with an uppercase letter
Suggestion: Instead
...elped laid-off xyz employees find jobs. instead of comparing walsh and delany based on ...
^^^^^^^
Transition Words or Phrases used:
also, but, first, hence, however, if, moreover, so, then, therefore, whereas, in short, first of all
Attributes: Values AverageValues Percentages(Values/AverageValues)% => Comments
Performance on Part of Speech:
To be verbs : 14.0 19.6327345309 71% => OK
Auxiliary verbs: 9.0 12.9520958084 69% => OK
Conjunction : 9.0 11.1786427146 81% => OK
Relative clauses : 12.0 13.6137724551 88% => OK
Pronoun: 30.0 28.8173652695 104% => OK
Preposition: 63.0 55.5748502994 113% => OK
Nominalization: 20.0 16.3942115768 122% => OK
Performance on vocabulary words:
No of characters: 2472.0 2260.96107784 109% => OK
No of words: 502.0 441.139720559 114% => OK
Chars per words: 4.92430278884 5.12650576532 96% => OK
Fourth root words length: 4.7334296765 4.56307096286 104% => OK
Word Length SD: 2.42366679385 2.78398813304 87% => OK
Unique words: 227.0 204.123752495 111% => OK
Unique words percentage: 0.45219123506 0.468620217663 96% => OK
syllable_count: 748.8 705.55239521 106% => OK
avg_syllables_per_word: 1.5 1.59920159681 94% => OK
A sentence (or a clause, phrase) starts by:
Pronoun: 8.0 4.96107784431 161% => OK
Article: 14.0 8.76447105788 160% => OK
Subordination: 3.0 2.70958083832 111% => OK
Conjunction: 2.0 1.67365269461 119% => OK
Preposition: 5.0 4.22255489022 118% => OK
Performance on sentences:
How many sentences: 27.0 19.7664670659 137% => OK
Sentence length: 18.0 22.8473053892 79% => The Avg. Sentence Length is relatively short.
Sentence length SD: 46.5020907535 57.8364921388 80% => OK
Chars per sentence: 91.5555555556 119.503703932 77% => OK
Words per sentence: 18.5925925926 23.324526521 80% => OK
Discourse Markers: 3.7037037037 5.70786347227 65% => OK
Paragraphs: 6.0 5.15768463074 116% => OK
Language errors: 11.0 5.25449101796 209% => Less language errors wanted.
Sentences with positive sentiment : 12.0 8.20758483034 146% => OK
Sentences with negative sentiment : 5.0 6.88822355289 73% => OK
Sentences with neutral sentiment: 10.0 4.67664670659 214% => Less facts, knowledge or examples wanted.
What are sentences with positive/Negative/neutral sentiment?
Coherence and Cohesion:
Essay topic to essay body coherence: 0.206201123293 0.218282227539 94% => OK
Sentence topic coherence: 0.0580345939329 0.0743258471296 78% => OK
Sentence topic coherence SD: 0.077817744036 0.0701772020484 111% => OK
Paragraph topic coherence: 0.120863748799 0.128457276422 94% => OK
Paragraph topic coherence SD: 0.0684576443444 0.0628817314937 109% => OK
Essay readability:
automated_readability_index: 11.0 14.3799401198 76% => Automated_readability_index is low.
flesch_reading_ease: 61.67 48.3550499002 128% => OK
smog_index: 3.1 7.1628742515 43% => Smog_index is low.
flesch_kincaid_grade: 9.1 12.197005988 75% => OK
coleman_liau_index: 11.26 12.5979740519 89% => OK
dale_chall_readability_score: 7.3 8.32208582834 88% => OK
difficult_words: 88.0 98.500998004 89% => OK
linsear_write_formula: 13.0 12.3882235529 105% => OK
gunning_fog: 9.2 11.1389221557 83% => OK
text_standard: 11.0 11.9071856287 92% => OK
What are above readability scores?
---------------------
Rates: 66.67 out of 100
Scores by essay e-grader: 4.0 Out of 6
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Note: the e-grader does NOT examine the meaning of words and ideas. VIP users will receive further evaluations by advanced module of e-grader and human graders.