The following appeared in a memorandum written by the vice president of Health Naturally, a small but expanding chain of stores selling health food and other health-related products.
"Our previous experience has been that our stores are most profitable in areas where residents are highly concerned with leading healthy lives. We should therefore build one of our new stores in Plainsville, which clearly has many such residents. Plainsville merchants report that sales of running shoes and exercise equipment are at all-time highs. The local health club, which nearly closed five years ago due to lack of business, has more members than ever, and the weight-training and aerobics classes are always full. We can even anticipate a new generation of customers: Plainsville's schoolchildren are required to participate in a program called Fitness for Life, which emphasizes the benefits of regular exercise at an early age."
Write a response in which you examine the stated and/or unstated assumptions of the argument. Be sure to explain how the argument depends on these assumptions and what the implications are for the argument if the assumptions prove unwarranted.
The author suggests that building a new store in Plainsville based on the past successful experience on the region where people are health conscious, and because Plainsville health club and running shoes store has become successful than ever. however, the argument is plagued with a number of skewed assumptions.
The author argues that previous successful experience on the area where people are highly caring about the health, so he new store is going to be successful. The assumption here is that people in Plainsville are health conscious and also willing to buy health food. This could be true if the background and the condition of Plainsville matches previous successful store place. however, it could be a total different story if their incoming or salary are pretty lower than average. people in Plainsville probably are barely to live on with their meager salary, they care about the health, but do not have capacity to buy health products, so they like to run with running shoes instead and that save a lot of money. The author has to address the assumption to make the argument more cogent.
Besides, the author also mentions that running shoes sold very well in and insinuates that the health store would be promising. The assumption could be correct if people who love exercise also want to buy health food. Still, another case would be that they are just fans of running, not for health. In other words, they run because of interest or habits not taking the health as a primary reason. Therefore, even the health store is newly established, they are not going to shop. Thus, the author has to handle with the assumption to strength the idea.
Additionally, the author implies that the new building store is going to be successful because the local health club’s business is excellent and the class are always fully booked. The assumption here is that people who love gym exercise also want to buy health food as well. it could be certainly true if people are wealth and eager to make a lots of effort taking care their health. Nevertheless, there could be another situation that residents would like to seek for natural health like exercise and they would not prefer to buy health supplement. because they believe naturally health is more important than just eating artificial vitamin or health food, they don’t want to buy the health food at all.
In conclusion, the author has to deal with the skewed assumptions mention above to make the argument more persuasive.
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Comments
e-rater score report
Attribute Value Ideal
Final score: 3.5 out of 6
Category: Satisfactory Excellent
No. of Grammatical Errors: 0 2
No. of Spelling Errors: 0 2
No. of Sentences: 15 15
No. of Words: 422 350
No. of Characters: 2018 1500
No. of Different Words: 174 200
Fourth Root of Number of Words: 4.532 4.7
Average Word Length: 4.782 4.6
Word Length SD: 2.425 2.4
No. of Words greater than 5 chars: 146 100
No. of Words greater than 6 chars: 86 80
No. of Words greater than 7 chars: 60 40
No. of Words greater than 8 chars: 41 20
Use of Passive Voice (%): 0 0
Avg. Sentence Length: 28.133 21.0
Sentence Length SD: 18.217 7.5
Use of Discourse Markers (%): 0.867 0.12
Sentence-Text Coherence: 0.416 0.35
Sentence-Para Coherence: 0.55 0.50
Sentence-Sentence Coherence: 0.12 0.07
Number of Paragraphs: 4 5
Grammar and spelling errors:
Line 1, column 244, Rule ID: UPPERCASE_SENTENCE_START
Message: This sentence does not start with an uppercase letter
Suggestion: However
... store has become successful than ever. however, the argument is plagued with a number ...
^^^^^^^
Line 2, column 1, Rule ID: WHITESPACE_RULE
Message: Possible typo: you repeated a whitespace
Suggestion:
...d with a number of skewed assumptions. The author argues that previous successf...
^^^^^^^^
Line 2, column 130, Rule ID: I_NEW[1]
Message: Did you mean 'knew' (past of "to know")?
Suggestion: knew
...e highly caring about the health, so he new store is going to be successful. The as...
^^^
Line 2, column 385, Rule ID: UPPERCASE_SENTENCE_START
Message: This sentence does not start with an uppercase letter
Suggestion: However
...atches previous successful store place. however, it could be a total different story if...
^^^^^^^
Line 2, column 489, Rule ID: UPPERCASE_SENTENCE_START
Message: This sentence does not start with an uppercase letter
Suggestion: People
...r salary are pretty lower than average. people in Plainsville probably are barely to l...
^^^^^^
Line 3, column 1, Rule ID: WHITESPACE_RULE
Message: Possible typo: you repeated a whitespace
Suggestion:
...tion to make the argument more cogent. Besides, the author also mentions that r...
^^^^^^^^
Line 3, column 79, Rule ID: WHITESPACE_RULE
Message: Possible typo: you repeated a whitespace
Suggestion:
...ons that running shoes sold very well in and insinuates that the health store wou...
^^
Line 3, column 124, Rule ID: PROGRESSIVE_VERBS[1]
Message: This verb is normally not used in the progressive form. Try a simple form instead.
... insinuates that the health store would be promising. The assumption could be correct if peo...
^^^^^^^^^^^^
Line 4, column 275, Rule ID: UPPERCASE_SENTENCE_START
Message: This sentence does not start with an uppercase letter
Suggestion: It
...e also want to buy health food as well. it could be certainly true if people are w...
^^
Line 4, column 341, Rule ID: A_PLURAL[1]
Message: Don't use indefinite articles with plural words. Did you mean 'a lot' or simply 'lots'?
Suggestion: a lot; lots
... if people are wealth and eager to make a lots of effort taking care their health. Nev...
^^^^^^
Line 4, column 550, Rule ID: UPPERCASE_SENTENCE_START
Message: This sentence does not start with an uppercase letter
Suggestion: Because
...ld not prefer to buy health supplement. because they believe naturally health is more i...
^^^^^^^
Line 5, column 1, Rule ID: WHITESPACE_RULE
Message: Possible typo: you repeated a whitespace
Suggestion:
...’t want to buy the health food at all. In conclusion, the author has to deal wi...
^^^^^^^^
Transition Words or Phrases used:
also, besides, but, however, if, nevertheless, so, still, therefore, thus, well, as to, in conclusion, in other words
Attributes: Values AverageValues Percentages(Values/AverageValues)% => Comments
Performance on Part of Speech:
To be verbs : 26.0 19.6327345309 132% => OK
Auxiliary verbs: 9.0 12.9520958084 69% => OK
Conjunction : 13.0 11.1786427146 116% => OK
Relative clauses : 14.0 13.6137724551 103% => OK
Pronoun: 25.0 28.8173652695 87% => OK
Preposition: 48.0 55.5748502994 86% => OK
Nominalization: 14.0 16.3942115768 85% => OK
Performance on vocabulary words:
No of characters: 2071.0 2260.96107784 92% => OK
No of words: 421.0 441.139720559 95% => OK
Chars per words: 4.91923990499 5.12650576532 96% => OK
Fourth root words length: 4.52971130743 4.56307096286 99% => OK
Word Length SD: 2.5161716505 2.78398813304 90% => OK
Unique words: 181.0 204.123752495 89% => More unique words wanted.
Unique words percentage: 0.429928741093 0.468620217663 92% => More unique words wanted or less content wanted.
syllable_count: 620.1 705.55239521 88% => OK
avg_syllables_per_word: 1.5 1.59920159681 94% => OK
A sentence (or a clause, phrase) starts by:
Pronoun: 7.0 4.96107784431 141% => OK
Article: 11.0 8.76447105788 126% => OK
Subordination: 1.0 2.70958083832 37% => OK
Conjunction: 2.0 1.67365269461 119% => OK
Preposition: 2.0 4.22255489022 47% => More preposition wanted as sentence beginning.
Performance on sentences:
How many sentences: 20.0 19.7664670659 101% => OK
Sentence length: 21.0 22.8473053892 92% => OK
Sentence length SD: 49.3186323817 57.8364921388 85% => OK
Chars per sentence: 103.55 119.503703932 87% => OK
Words per sentence: 21.05 23.324526521 90% => OK
Discourse Markers: 5.85 5.70786347227 102% => OK
Paragraphs: 5.0 5.15768463074 97% => OK
Language errors: 12.0 5.25449101796 228% => Less language errors wanted.
Sentences with positive sentiment : 14.0 8.20758483034 171% => OK
Sentences with negative sentiment : 3.0 6.88822355289 44% => More negative sentences wanted.
Sentences with neutral sentiment: 3.0 4.67664670659 64% => OK
What are sentences with positive/Negative/neutral sentiment?
Coherence and Cohesion:
Essay topic to essay body coherence: 0.253079497453 0.218282227539 116% => OK
Sentence topic coherence: 0.0942463895469 0.0743258471296 127% => OK
Sentence topic coherence SD: 0.0658951391323 0.0701772020484 94% => OK
Paragraph topic coherence: 0.155368665073 0.128457276422 121% => OK
Paragraph topic coherence SD: 0.0811717909798 0.0628817314937 129% => OK
Essay readability:
automated_readability_index: 12.3 14.3799401198 86% => Automated_readability_index is low.
flesch_reading_ease: 58.62 48.3550499002 121% => OK
smog_index: 3.1 7.1628742515 43% => Smog_index is low.
flesch_kincaid_grade: 10.3 12.197005988 84% => OK
coleman_liau_index: 11.26 12.5979740519 89% => OK
dale_chall_readability_score: 7.27 8.32208582834 87% => OK
difficult_words: 69.0 98.500998004 70% => More difficult words wanted.
linsear_write_formula: 9.0 12.3882235529 73% => OK
gunning_fog: 10.4 11.1389221557 93% => OK
text_standard: 11.0 11.9071856287 92% => OK
What are above readability scores?
---------------------
Rates: 58.33 out of 100
Scores by essay e-grader: 3.5 Out of 6
---------------------
Note: the e-grader does NOT examine the meaning of words and ideas. VIP users will receive further evaluations by advanced module of e-grader and human graders.