The following appeared in a newspaper article about law firms in the city of Megalopolis.
"In Megalopolis, the number of law school graduates who went to work for large, corporate firms declined by 15 percent over the last three years, whereas an increasing number of graduates took jobs at small, general practice firms. Even though large firms usually offer much higher salaries, law school graduates are choosing to work for the smaller firms most likely because they experience greater job satisfaction at smaller firms. In a survey of first-year students at a leading law school, most agreed with the statement that earning a high salary was less important to them than job satisfaction. This finding suggests that the large, corporate firms of Megalopolis will need to offer graduates more benefits and incentives and reduce the number of hours they must work."
In this memo, the author asserts that there are some problems regarding to working in large companies in Megapolis since those companies provide less facilities than small firms for law graduate students. The author states that in the last three years number of graduate students hired in law companies diminished by fifteen percent and first year student agree that work in small companies are beneficial since student work less hours, and also large companies suggest high salary but students never accept the job position in them. Close scrutiny of this memo reveals that these facts are unconvincing as it stands.
First of all, the decrease of 15 percent does not necessarily reflect the overall opinion toward job opportunity in the area. It is entirely possible there were some impetus position in other companies for example in hometown of student there were some unrelated job opportunities with preferable facilities which students no longer want to work in their specific field of study. There is another possible assumption toward 15 percent decrease, and that is full positions of companies which they have no vacancy in their positions, so they no longer accept graduate student.
Second, author claims that regarding to the one survey, first year student prefer to work in small companies rather than large firms since those firms provide more comfortable positions for students. This fact is not reliable since first year students have no precious experiences in large companies, pondering benefits of large companies such as, numerous experts; highly developed devices and software make a large company favorable for them. Or perhaps they did know the conditions of market and economic conditions of world which make clear the benefits of large companies.
Third, the high salary of large companies no longer attracts students to work in large companies. It is possible that companies had some difficult scopes like working in remote areas and in regions with harsh climate. Since pondering conditions assess that working with high salary is not preferable for law graduate students. Apart from that small companies may provide some other facilities like vocation, working in favorable areas and taking loans and meals to employee which is rare in large companies.
To conclude, the memo contains several doubtful assumptions which make them ambiguous to vote on. To bolster this memo the author should provide clear evidence about real conditions of small companies and the place they work in. The author should also provide some arguments about conditions of students in the survey in the time of graduation. I would need more information about other facilities in Megapolis to better assessment of this memo.
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argument 1 -- OK
argument 2 -- not OK. The survey is for first-year students only, how about other students?
argument 3 -- not OK. Need to argue against the conclusion. For this topic it is:
This finding suggests that the large, corporate firms of Megalopolis will need to offer graduates more benefits and incentives and reduce the number of hours they must work.
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Attribute Value Ideal
Score: 2.5 out of 6
Category: Satisfactory Excellent
No. of Grammatical Errors: 0 2
No. of Spelling Errors: 0 2
No. of Sentences: 17 15
No. of Words: 435 350
No. of Characters: 2260 1500
No. of Different Words: 193 200
Fourth Root of Number of Words: 4.567 4.7
Average Word Length: 5.195 4.6
Word Length SD: 2.502 2.4
No. of Words greater than 5 chars: 165 100
No. of Words greater than 6 chars: 132 80
No. of Words greater than 7 chars: 96 40
No. of Words greater than 8 chars: 57 20
Use of Passive Voice (%): 0 0
Avg. Sentence Length: 25.588 21.0
Sentence Length SD: 10.572 7.5
Use of Discourse Markers (%): 0.588 0.12
Sentence-Text Coherence: 0.376 0.35
Sentence-Para Coherence: 0.604 0.50
Sentence-Sentence Coherence: 0.145 0.07
Number of Paragraphs: 5 5