The auther claims that to increase enrollment and solve the problem of budget deficits at Humana University, we should initiate and actively promote online degree programs like those at Omni. To support the conclustion, he cites various evidences. Although the evidences appear to bolster the argument, a meticulous analysis will show otherwise. So in order to make the argument more sound, the auther need to cite the following specific evidences.
1) The teacher's quality at Humana University.
2) The location of Humana University.
3) The courses at Humana University.
First, the auther has not stated the teacher's quality at Humana University, it is not necessarily be true that the main cause of not growing the enrollment of students at Humna University is building based teaching learnig activities. Usually, the number of students doesn't grow if the quality of teachers is not good enough, if the students don't get motivated towards studies , then in such institution the enrollement number doesn't grow. But the auther has not presented any such evidences in his claim.
Second, the number of students depend upon the location of the University. If the location of the Humana University is not good comparatively to the Omni University then it might be the another cause of not growing the enrolment number of students. One the other hand, if the transportation facililties in Humana University is not good, then it might be the another cause, in modern days, the transportation plays a cardinal role in growing the number of enrollment.
Thirdly, the writer has not presented any information regarding the courses available in Humana University, if the programs at this university is not good, that is if the courses are not updated according to the present scenario, it would be the another cause of not growing the number of enrollment at Humana University.
In sum, the writer should provide more specific evidences such as the quality of teachers at Humana University , the location and the programe available at this University, without these specific evidences, I cannot convince with the auther's claim.
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e-rater score report
Attribute Value Ideal
Final score: 3.5 out of 6
Category: Satisfactory Excellent
No. of Grammatical Errors: 8 2
No. of Spelling Errors: 9 2
No. of Sentences: 15 15
No. of Words: 344 350
No. of Characters: 1734 1500
No. of Different Words: 147 200
Fourth Root of Number of Words: 4.307 4.7
Average Word Length: 5.041 4.6
Word Length SD: 2.818 2.4
No. of Words greater than 5 chars: 142 100
No. of Words greater than 6 chars: 107 80
No. of Words greater than 7 chars: 79 40
No. of Words greater than 8 chars: 48 20
Use of Passive Voice (%): 0 0
Avg. Sentence Length: 22.933 21.0
Sentence Length SD: 14.59 7.5
Use of Discourse Markers (%): 0.6 0.12
Sentence-Text Coherence: 0.405 0.35
Sentence-Para Coherence: 0.685 0.50
Sentence-Sentence Coherence: 0.185 0.07
Number of Paragraphs: 6 5
Grammar and spelling errors:
Line 1, column 281, Rule ID: WHITESPACE_RULE
Message: Possible typo: you repeated a whitespace
Suggestion:
...dences. Although the evidences appear to bolster the argument, a meticulous analy...
^^
Line 7, column 191, Rule ID: WHITESPACE_RULE
Message: Possible typo: you repeated a whitespace
Suggestion:
...lment of students at Humna University is building based teaching learnig activiti...
^^
Line 7, column 270, Rule ID: EN_CONTRACTION_SPELLING
Message: Possible spelling mistake found
Suggestion: doesn't
...ities. Usually, the number of students doesnt grow if the quality of teachers is not ...
^^^^^^
Line 7, column 345, Rule ID: EN_CONTRACTION_SPELLING
Message: Possible spelling mistake found
Suggestion: don't
...ers is not good enough, if the students dont get motivated towards studies , then in...
^^^^
Line 7, column 379, Rule ID: COMMA_PARENTHESIS_WHITESPACE
Message: Put a space after the comma, but not before the comma
Suggestion: ,
...dents dont get motivated towards studies , then in such institution the enrollemen...
^^
Line 7, column 429, Rule ID: WHITESPACE_RULE
Message: Possible typo: you repeated a whitespace
Suggestion:
... such institution the enrollement number doesnt grow. But the auther has not pres...
^^^
Line 7, column 432, Rule ID: EN_CONTRACTION_SPELLING
Message: Possible spelling mistake found
Suggestion: doesn't
...ch institution the enrollement number doesnt grow. But the auther has not presented ...
^^^^^^
Line 9, column 8, Rule ID: WHITESPACE_RULE
Message: Possible typo: you repeated a whitespace
Suggestion:
... such evidences in his claim. Second, the number of students depend upon the l...
^^
Line 9, column 77, Rule ID: SENTENCE_FRAGMENT[1]
Message: “If” at the beginning of a sentence requires a 2nd clause. Maybe a comma, question or exclamation mark is missing, or the sentence is incomplete and should be joined with the following sentence.
...nd upon the location of the University. If the location of the Humana University i...
^^
Line 13, column 111, Rule ID: COMMA_PARENTHESIS_WHITESPACE
Message: Put a space after the comma, but not before the comma
Suggestion: ,
...quality of teachers at Humana University , the location and the programe available...
^^
Transition Words or Phrases used:
but, first, if, regarding, second, so, then, third, thirdly, such as
Attributes: Values AverageValues Percentages(Values/AverageValues)% => Comments
Performance on Part of Speech:
To be verbs : 12.0 19.6327345309 61% => OK
Auxiliary verbs: 8.0 12.9520958084 62% => OK
Conjunction : 4.0 11.1786427146 36% => More conjunction wanted.
Relative clauses : 3.0 13.6137724551 22% => More relative clauses wanted.
Pronoun: 15.0 28.8173652695 52% => OK
Preposition: 45.0 55.5748502994 81% => OK
Nominalization: 17.0 16.3942115768 104% => OK
Performance on vocabulary words:
No of characters: 1794.0 2260.96107784 79% => OK
No of words: 341.0 441.139720559 77% => More content wanted.
Chars per words: 5.26099706745 5.12650576532 103% => OK
Fourth root words length: 4.29722995808 4.56307096286 94% => OK
Word Length SD: 2.90310505109 2.78398813304 104% => OK
Unique words: 152.0 204.123752495 74% => More unique words wanted.
Unique words percentage: 0.445747800587 0.468620217663 95% => OK
syllable_count: 579.6 705.55239521 82% => OK
avg_syllables_per_word: 1.7 1.59920159681 106% => OK
A sentence (or a clause, phrase) starts by:
Pronoun: 6.0 4.96107784431 121% => OK
Article: 10.0 8.76447105788 114% => OK
Subordination: 5.0 2.70958083832 185% => OK
Conjunction: 1.0 1.67365269461 60% => OK
Preposition: 4.0 4.22255489022 95% => OK
Performance on sentences:
How many sentences: 15.0 19.7664670659 76% => Need more sentences. Double check the format of sentences, make sure there is a space between two sentences, or have enough periods. And also check the lengths of sentences, maybe they are too long.
Sentence length: 22.0 22.8473053892 96% => OK
Sentence length SD: 88.9812464636 57.8364921388 154% => OK
Chars per sentence: 119.6 119.503703932 100% => OK
Words per sentence: 22.7333333333 23.324526521 97% => OK
Discourse Markers: 4.53333333333 5.70786347227 79% => OK
Paragraphs: 8.0 5.15768463074 155% => Less paragraphs wanted.
Language errors: 10.0 5.25449101796 190% => OK
Sentences with positive sentiment : 4.0 8.20758483034 49% => More positive sentences wanted.
Sentences with negative sentiment : 7.0 6.88822355289 102% => OK
Sentences with neutral sentiment: 4.0 4.67664670659 86% => OK
What are sentences with positive/Negative/neutral sentiment?
Coherence and Cohesion:
Essay topic to essay body coherence: 0.105750354218 0.218282227539 48% => OK
Sentence topic coherence: 0.0397888100875 0.0743258471296 54% => OK
Sentence topic coherence SD: 0.0435641518028 0.0701772020484 62% => OK
Paragraph topic coherence: 0.0443431634286 0.128457276422 35% => Maybe some paragraphs are off the topic.
Paragraph topic coherence SD: 0.0404093545142 0.0628817314937 64% => OK
Essay readability:
automated_readability_index: 14.7 14.3799401198 102% => OK
flesch_reading_ease: 40.69 48.3550499002 84% => OK
smog_index: 11.2 7.1628742515 156% => OK
flesch_kincaid_grade: 13.1 12.197005988 107% => OK
coleman_liau_index: 13.52 12.5979740519 107% => OK
dale_chall_readability_score: 8.2 8.32208582834 99% => OK
difficult_words: 75.0 98.500998004 76% => More difficult words wanted.
linsear_write_formula: 6.5 12.3882235529 52% => Linsear_write_formula is low.
gunning_fog: 10.8 11.1389221557 97% => OK
text_standard: 11.0 11.9071856287 92% => OK
What are above readability scores?
---------------------
Maximum six paragraphs wanted.
Rates: 62.5 out of 100
Scores by essay e-grader: 3.75 Out of 6
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Note: the e-grader does NOT examine the meaning of words and ideas. VIP users will receive further evaluations by advanced module of e-grader and human graders.