The author claims that inoculations against cow flu cannot be permitted to be routinely administered, based on the premise that there is a small possibility that a person may die as a result of the inoculations; despite the fact that many lives might be saved if inoculations were administered to all the people in areas where the disease is detected.While the message the author is trying to convey is conspicuous, the way the author goes about it is flawed.Though at first glance, the argument may seem convincing, on closer inspection we find that the argument is facile and is filled with loopholes, without any strong evidence to bolster the author's claim.
The author claims that many lives will be saved if inoculations are administered routinely, to all the people in areas where the disease is detected.However, the author fails to mention exactly how many lives will be saved? How frequently will the inoculations will have to administered? Had the author buttressed his argument with numbers and statistical data as evidence to support his claim, his argument would have been more convincing and tenable.
Further the author vaguely points out that there is a "small possibility' that a person may die as a result of the inoculations.Here again the author would have done well to have substantiated his claim with numbers (exactly how many people die?) , instead of vague terms, which do not lead to a concrete conclusion.
Additionally, the author hasn't provided any evidence that explores the cause of death to be only because of inoculations and not because of something else or it being a coincidence,or circumstantial. Had the author provided evidence of isolated cases of deaths only due inoculations, his argument would have been stronger.
While the intentions of the author are pure, and he tries to advocate against the administration of inoculations against cow flu, his argument is facile.There is no conclusive evidence in the argument to espouse his view.
- In your opinion,which modern invention or scientific discovery has affected society the most?Use specific reasons and examples to support your answer. 90
- Some parents forbid young children from owning smart phones (cell phones with Internet access), while others disagree and believe that they are important tools for keeping in touch. Which point of view do you think is better, and why? 80
- Nature's Way, a chain of stores selling health food and other health-related products, is opening its next franchise in the town of Plainsville. The store should prove to be very successful: Nature's Way franchises tend to be most 89
- "Many lives might be saved if inoculations against cow flu were routinely administered to all people in areas in which the disease is detected.However since there is a small possibility that a person will die as a result of the inoculations,we cannot perm 55
- TOEFL integrated writing: Dutch painter Rembrandt 3
Essay evaluation report
flaws:
the arguments are not exactly right on the point.
Attribute Value Ideal
Final score: 3.0 out of 6
Category: Satisfactory Excellent
No. of Grammatical Errors: 0 2
No. of Spelling Errors: 0 2
No. of Sentences: 9 15
No. of Words: 330 350
No. of Characters: 1620 1500
No. of Different Words: 147 200
Fourth Root of Number of Words: 4.262 4.7
Average Word Length: 4.909 4.6
Word Length SD: 2.852 2.4
No. of Words greater than 5 chars: 114 100
No. of Words greater than 6 chars: 81 80
No. of Words greater than 7 chars: 57 40
No. of Words greater than 8 chars: 35 20
Use of Passive Voice (%): 0 0
Avg. Sentence Length: 36.667 21.0
Sentence Length SD: 21.577 7.5
Use of Discourse Markers (%): 0.444 0.12
Sentence-Text Coherence: 0.486 0.35
Sentence-Para Coherence: 0.75 0.50
Sentence-Sentence Coherence: 0.186 0.07
Number of Paragraphs: 5 5
Grammar and spelling errors:
Line 1, column 352, Rule ID: SENTENCE_WHITESPACE
Message: Add a space between sentences
Suggestion: While
... in areas where the disease is detected.While the message the author is trying to con...
^^^^^
Line 1, column 460, Rule ID: SENTENCE_WHITESPACE
Message: Add a space between sentences
Suggestion: Though
... way the author goes about it is flawed.Though at first glance, the argument may seem ...
^^^^^^
Line 3, column 150, Rule ID: SENTENCE_WHITESPACE
Message: Add a space between sentences
Suggestion: However
... in areas where the disease is detected.However, the author fails to mention exactly ho...
^^^^^^^
Line 5, column 53, Rule ID: EN_A_VS_AN
Message: Use 'an' instead of 'a' if the following word starts with a vowel sound, e.g. 'an article', 'an hour'
Suggestion: an
...author vaguely points out that there is a 'small possibility that a person m...
^
Line 5, column 133, Rule ID: SENTENCE_WHITESPACE
Message: Add a space between sentences
Suggestion: Here
...may die as a result of the inoculations.Here again the author would have done well t...
^^^^
Line 5, column 250, Rule ID: COMMA_PARENTHESIS_WHITESPACE
Message: Put a space after the comma, but not before the comma
Suggestion: ,
...th numbers exactly how many people die? , instead of vague terms, which do not le...
^
Line 7, column 26, Rule ID: EN_CONTRACTION_SPELLING
Message: Possible spelling mistake found
Suggestion: hasn't
...conclusion. Additionally, the author hasnt provided any evidence that explores the...
^^^^^
Line 7, column 181, Rule ID: COMMA_PARENTHESIS_WHITESPACE
Message: Put a space after the comma
Suggestion: , or
...something else or it being a coincidence,or circumstantial. Had the author provided...
^^^
Line 9, column 154, Rule ID: SENTENCE_WHITESPACE
Message: Add a space between sentences
Suggestion: There
...against cow flu, his argument is facile.There is no conclusive evidence in the argume...
^^^^^
Transition Words or Phrases used:
but, first, however, if, may, so, well, while, as a result
Attributes: Values AverageValues Percentages(Values/AverageValues)% => Comments
Performance on Part of Speech:
To be verbs : 23.0 19.6327345309 117% => OK
Auxiliary verbs: 12.0 12.9520958084 93% => OK
Conjunction : 7.0 11.1786427146 63% => OK
Relative clauses : 12.0 13.6137724551 88% => OK
Pronoun: 20.0 28.8173652695 69% => OK
Preposition: 39.0 55.5748502994 70% => OK
Nominalization: 16.0 16.3942115768 98% => OK
Performance on vocabulary words:
No of characters: 1671.0 2260.96107784 74% => OK
No of words: 323.0 441.139720559 73% => More content wanted.
Chars per words: 5.173374613 5.12650576532 101% => OK
Fourth root words length: 4.23936324884 4.56307096286 93% => OK
Word Length SD: 3.19780940443 2.78398813304 115% => OK
Unique words: 156.0 204.123752495 76% => More unique words wanted.
Unique words percentage: 0.482972136223 0.468620217663 103% => OK
syllable_count: 538.2 705.55239521 76% => OK
avg_syllables_per_word: 1.7 1.59920159681 106% => OK
A sentence (or a clause, phrase) starts by:
Pronoun: 3.0 4.96107784431 60% => OK
Article: 6.0 8.76447105788 68% => OK
Subordination: 3.0 2.70958083832 111% => OK
Conjunction: 2.0 1.67365269461 119% => OK
Preposition: 5.0 4.22255489022 118% => OK
Performance on sentences:
How many sentences: 9.0 19.7664670659 46% => Need more sentences. Double check the format of sentences, make sure there is a space between two sentences, or have enough periods. And also check the lengths of sentences, maybe they are too long.
Sentence length: 35.0 22.8473053892 153% => The Avg. Sentence Length is relatively long.
Sentence length SD: 168.620180975 57.8364921388 292% => The lengths of sentences changed so frequently.
Chars per sentence: 185.666666667 119.503703932 155% => OK
Words per sentence: 35.8888888889 23.324526521 154% => OK
Discourse Markers: 6.44444444444 5.70786347227 113% => OK
Paragraphs: 5.0 5.15768463074 97% => OK
Language errors: 9.0 5.25449101796 171% => OK
Sentences with positive sentiment : 2.0 8.20758483034 24% => More positive sentences wanted.
Sentences with negative sentiment : 6.0 6.88822355289 87% => OK
Sentences with neutral sentiment: 1.0 4.67664670659 21% => More facts, knowledge or examples wanted.
What are sentences with positive/Negative/neutral sentiment?
Coherence and Cohesion:
Essay topic to essay body coherence: 0.34033087105 0.218282227539 156% => OK
Sentence topic coherence: 0.136418318714 0.0743258471296 184% => OK
Sentence topic coherence SD: 0.126038513398 0.0701772020484 180% => OK
Paragraph topic coherence: 0.18174465931 0.128457276422 141% => OK
Paragraph topic coherence SD: 0.109176188453 0.0628817314937 174% => OK
Essay readability:
automated_readability_index: 20.9 14.3799401198 145% => OK
flesch_reading_ease: 27.49 48.3550499002 57% => Flesch_reading_ease is low.
smog_index: 13.0 7.1628742515 181% => OK
flesch_kincaid_grade: 18.1 12.197005988 148% => OK
coleman_liau_index: 13.3 12.5979740519 106% => OK
dale_chall_readability_score: 8.55 8.32208582834 103% => OK
difficult_words: 65.0 98.500998004 66% => More difficult words wanted.
linsear_write_formula: 59.0 12.3882235529 476% => Linsear_write_formula is high.
gunning_fog: 16.0 11.1389221557 144% => OK
text_standard: 13.0 11.9071856287 109% => OK
What are above readability scores?
---------------------
Rates: 50.0 out of 100
Scores by essay e-grader: 3.0 Out of 6
---------------------
Note: the e-grader does NOT examine the meaning of words and ideas. VIP users will receive further evaluations by advanced module of e-grader and human graders.