To serve the housing needs of our students, Buckingham College should build a number of new dormitories. Buckingham's enrollment is growing and, based on current trends, will double over the next 50 years, thus making existing dormitory space inadequate. Moreover, the average rent for an apartment in our town has risen in recent years. Consequently, students will find it increasingly difficult to afford off-campus housing. Finally, attractive new dormitories would make prospective students more likely to enroll at Buckingham."
Write a response in which you discuss what specific evidence is needed to evaluate the argument and explain how the evidence would weaken or strengthen the argument.
The director of student housing at Buckingham College crafted a memo in which he asseverates that Buckingham College should establish a number of new school dormitories in order to accommodate more new and prospective students. The author of the memo founded his argument on the basis of the current trends of Buckingham’s increased enrollment rate and therefore projecting that the number of students attending Buckingham College will have witnessed a double of enrollment in the next fifty years. He also asserts that the average rent of off-campus housing has been becoming less and less affordable for students and prospective students will be enhanced by arresting new dormitory facilities, thereby leading them to enroll at Buckingham College. Though the claim appearing appealing, the argument rests upon a want of several pieces of evidence that should merit further appraisal in order for the central augment to be validated and for the cited suggestions to succeed.
First and foremost, the author of the memo audaciously projects that Buckingham’s enrollment will double over the next fifty years. More evidence, or empirical data, is needed so as to justify whether such foreshadowing will likely arise. The enrollment of colleges is contingent upon a host of variables, such as tuition affordability, geographical location, facility equipment, professors’ reputes, job placements and the like. Since these factors are not, if not never, stable, one cannot readily adumbrate that the enrollment of Buckingham College will boom down the road. If a newer college is established in the town, it might compete with Buckingham for student enrollment, a scenario that might render the proposed new student dormitories useless. Accordingly, for the author of the memo to confidently argues that Buckingham’s enrollment will be in an auspicious upward, he needs to furnish with more data pertinent to future trends with regards to tendencies of students’ enrollment.
What ensues is the wanting of evidence in what truly invites prospective students to attend a school. Is it the reputation of the faculty on campus? Is it the quality of the education that students receive at Buckingham? Is it the support and accommodation, be it financial, emotional, or physical, that students receive from the school? Students finding the quality of education approbatory but that of school dormitories objectionable may be still willing to attend Buckingham since they have the latitude to choose not to live on campus. Therefore, without more robust evidence to corroborate that prospective new students will be more likely to be attracted by new student dormitories, the author’s claim is rather flimsy and readily compromised.
The last piece of evidence that should be aptly supplied and addressed for the argument in the memo is the rising average rent for apartments in the town where Buckingham College is situated. The author of the memo recommends that since the off-campus housing has become prohibitively costly, students are likely to be deterred from living off-campus. However, one critical piece of evidence needs to be proffered so that suggesting building more new student dormitories to accommodate more students can be deemed rational: the expense of on-campus housing. It is quite plausible that even the cost of the off-campus hosing has become higher in recent years, it is still far lower than that of living on-campus. In this case, few or students with financial or budgeting concerns might still opt to live in off-campus apartments. This would certainly make nugatory living on campus and building more student dormitories.
All told, specific evidence is in order for the central argument made by the author of the memo to become sound and foolproof. These pieces of evidence that are needed entail the information germane to the expected increase of the school enrollment, the actual causes informing prospective students’ decision of attending a particular school, and the expense of on-campus housing at Buckingham College. The author’s argument would be further strengthened and cemented, were these pieces of evidence supplied.
| Post date | Users | Rates | Link to Content |
|---|---|---|---|
| 2019-10-31 | aniketnichat | 39 | view |
| 2019-10-15 | abhishekp2301 | 50 | view |
| 2019-08-24 | p30kh40 | 33 | view |
| 2019-08-07 | Ghader | 89 | view |
| 2019-07-30 | SOUMEDHIK | 43 | view |
- Colleges and universities should require all faculty to spend time working outside the academic world in professions relevant to the courses they teach. 66
- A ten-year nationwide study of the effectiveness of wearing a helmet while bicycling indicates that ten years ago, approximately 35 percent of all bicyclists reported wearing helmets, whereas today that number is nearly 80 percent. Another study, however 89
- Some people are more content with the life in the big city, while others think that they will be more satisfied to live in the village (small towns) instead. What is your opinion about this prompt and your preference? 73
- Some people like to buy and eat their meals at restaurants frequently, while others like to do this at home. Which do you prefer? Why? 73
- During the past year workers at our newly opened factory reported 30 percent more on the job accidents than workers at nearby Panoply Industries Panoply produces products very similar to those produced at our factory but its work shifts are one hour short 87
Comments
Essay evaluation report
argument 1 -- not OK. In GRE, we don't cast doubt on the trend itself, yes, it may not happen, but what GRE wanted is: suppose it happens? how to argue?
argument 2 -- OK
argument 3 -- OK
----------------
flaws:
No. of Words: 650 350 //the introduction is too long. the arguments are relatively long too. around 400-450 words are enough.
---------------------
Attribute Value Ideal
Final score: 3.5 out of 6
Category: Satisfactory Excellent
No. of Grammatical Errors: 0 2
No. of Spelling Errors: 0 2
No. of Sentences: 25 15
No. of Words: 650 350
No. of Characters: 3440 1500
No. of Different Words: 277 200
Fourth Root of Number of Words: 5.049 4.7
Average Word Length: 5.292 4.6
Word Length SD: 2.883 2.4
No. of Words greater than 5 chars: 283 100
No. of Words greater than 6 chars: 222 80
No. of Words greater than 7 chars: 162 40
No. of Words greater than 8 chars: 105 20
Use of Passive Voice (%): 0 0
Avg. Sentence Length: 26 21.0
Sentence Length SD: 9.377 7.5
Use of Discourse Markers (%): 0.52 0.12
Sentence-Text Coherence: 0.325 0.35
Sentence-Para Coherence: 0.516 0.50
Sentence-Sentence Coherence: 0.093 0.07
Number of Paragraphs: 5 5
Grammar and spelling errors:
Line 3, column 182, Rule ID: SO_AS_TO[1]
Message: Use simply 'to'
Suggestion: to
... evidence, or empirical data, is needed so as to justify whether such foreshadowing will...
^^^^^^^^
Line 5, column 222, Rule ID: ENGLISH_WORD_REPEAT_BEGINNING_RULE
Message: Three successive sentences begin with the same word. Reword the sentence or use a thesaurus to find a synonym.
...on that students receive at Buckingham? Is it the support and accommodation, be it...
^^
Line 7, column 103, Rule ID: WHITESPACE_RULE
Message: Possible typo: you repeated a whitespace
Suggestion:
...ddressed for the argument in the memo is the rising average rent for apartments i...
^^
Transition Words or Phrases used:
accordingly, also, but, first, however, if, may, so, still, then, therefore, as to, such as
Attributes: Values AverageValues Percentages(Values/AverageValues)% => Comments
Performance on Part of Speech:
To be verbs : 30.0 19.6327345309 153% => OK
Auxiliary verbs: 18.0 12.9520958084 139% => OK
Conjunction : 19.0 11.1786427146 170% => OK
Relative clauses : 20.0 13.6137724551 147% => OK
Pronoun: 36.0 28.8173652695 125% => Less pronouns wanted
Preposition: 101.0 55.5748502994 182% => OK
Nominalization: 31.0 16.3942115768 189% => OK
Performance on vocabulary words:
No of characters: 3560.0 2260.96107784 157% => OK
No of words: 650.0 441.139720559 147% => Less content wanted.
Chars per words: 5.47692307692 5.12650576532 107% => OK
Fourth root words length: 5.04926703274 4.56307096286 111% => OK
Word Length SD: 3.11734980753 2.78398813304 112% => OK
Unique words: 288.0 204.123752495 141% => OK
Unique words percentage: 0.443076923077 0.468620217663 95% => More unique words wanted or less content wanted.
syllable_count: 1116.0 705.55239521 158% => OK
avg_syllables_per_word: 1.7 1.59920159681 106% => OK
A sentence (or a clause, phrase) starts by:
Pronoun: 8.0 4.96107784431 161% => OK
Article: 11.0 8.76447105788 126% => OK
Subordination: 4.0 2.70958083832 148% => OK
Conjunction: 3.0 1.67365269461 179% => OK
Preposition: 3.0 4.22255489022 71% => OK
Performance on sentences:
How many sentences: 25.0 19.7664670659 126% => OK
Sentence length: 26.0 22.8473053892 114% => OK
Sentence length SD: 63.4815752798 57.8364921388 110% => OK
Chars per sentence: 142.4 119.503703932 119% => OK
Words per sentence: 26.0 23.324526521 111% => OK
Discourse Markers: 3.64 5.70786347227 64% => OK
Paragraphs: 5.0 5.15768463074 97% => OK
Language errors: 3.0 5.25449101796 57% => OK
Sentences with positive sentiment : 13.0 8.20758483034 158% => OK
Sentences with negative sentiment : 5.0 6.88822355289 73% => OK
Sentences with neutral sentiment: 7.0 4.67664670659 150% => OK
What are sentences with positive/Negative/neutral sentiment?
Coherence and Cohesion:
Essay topic to essay body coherence: 0.241945610539 0.218282227539 111% => OK
Sentence topic coherence: 0.0798297327081 0.0743258471296 107% => OK
Sentence topic coherence SD: 0.0783697453057 0.0701772020484 112% => OK
Paragraph topic coherence: 0.153250000684 0.128457276422 119% => OK
Paragraph topic coherence SD: 0.0922478656505 0.0628817314937 147% => OK
Essay readability:
automated_readability_index: 17.4 14.3799401198 121% => OK
flesch_reading_ease: 36.63 48.3550499002 76% => OK
smog_index: 8.8 7.1628742515 123% => OK
flesch_kincaid_grade: 14.6 12.197005988 120% => OK
coleman_liau_index: 14.8 12.5979740519 117% => OK
dale_chall_readability_score: 9.13 8.32208582834 110% => OK
difficult_words: 173.0 98.500998004 176% => OK
linsear_write_formula: 18.5 12.3882235529 149% => OK
gunning_fog: 12.4 11.1389221557 111% => OK
text_standard: 15.0 11.9071856287 126% => OK
What are above readability scores?
---------------------
Write the essay in 30 minutes.
Rates: 66.67 out of 100
Scores by essay e-grader: 4.0 Out of 6
---------------------
Note: the e-grader does NOT examine the meaning of words and ideas. VIP users will receive further evaluations by advanced module of e-grader and human graders.