ARGUMENT(9)The following appeared in a memorandum written by the vice president of Health Naturally, a small but expanding chain of stores selling health food and other health-related products.
“Our previous experience has been that our stores are most profitable in areas where residents are highly concerned with leading healthy lives. We should therefore build one of our new stores in Plainsville, which exercise equipment are at all-time highs. The local health club, which nearly closed five years ago due to lack of business, has more members than ever, and the weight-training and aerobics classes are always full. We can even anticipate a new generation of customers: Plainsville’s schoolchildren are required to participate in a program called Fitness for Life, which emphasizes the benefits of regular exercise at an early age.”
Merely based on unfounded assumption and dubious evidence, the statement draws a conclusion that the next Nature’s franchise in the town of Plainsville will prove to be very successful. At first glance, the author’s argument appears to be somewhat convincing, but further reflection reveals that the statement omits some substantial concerns that should be addressed, thus, not cogent enough.
To start with, the argument assumes too hastily that the store would be profitable due to the leading healthy lives in Plainsville, mainly because the sales of running shoes and exercise equipment are at all-time highs. While residents in Plainsville may have bought the products on purpose of health, a concrete connection between the sales of these sport equipment and the healthy lifestyle is not efficiently made. Perhaps, for example, the all-time highs record is affected by the Olympic Games or some other competition like the World Cup soccer. In that case, the high sales do not representative to indicate that the habitants there value healthy lives.
In addition, the author claims that people in Plainsville are intrigued in healthy sports recently, also because the local health club has more members than ever, and the weight-training and aerobics classes are always full. Yet the assumption is unwarranted because we do not know the purpose of people who take exercises in the health club and even who are interested in it. To clarify, the author assumes without justification that healthy exercises are appealing to ordinary residents widespread in Plainsville. If the local health club, which even nearly closed five years ago due to lack of business, recently becomes prevalent, only because some promotion activities or discounts, it would be precarious to conclude leading healthy lives in Plainsville.
Finally, the arguer’s conclusion relies on the shaky presumption that the anticipation of a new generation of customers, exactly schoolchildren who are engaged in a program called Fitness for Life, is justifiable. However, there is absolutely no proof provided that students in Plainsville have the enough money and will to afford health food or other products, or this customer type has a big proportion in the whole customer base. Schoolchildren may only want to accomplish homework and other demands involved in the program, instead of really seeking healthy way to live. Any of these scenarios, if true, would serve to undermine the hope that Plainsville’s students will share a big part of the whole consumers.
To sum up, this arguer fails to substantiate the claim that it is a wise choice to open a new store of Health Naturally, because the evidence cited in the analysis do not lend strong support to what the arguer maintains. Without additional evidences, however, we should be wary about accepting the truth of the argument’s conclusion.
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flaws:
Use of Discourse Markers (%): 0.75 0.12
Attribute Value Ideal
Score: 5.0 out of 6
Category: Very Good Excellent
No. of Grammatical Errors: 0 2
No. of Spelling Errors: 0 2
No. of Sentences: 16 15
No. of Words: 457 350
No. of Characters: 2361 1500
No. of Different Words: 249 200
Fourth Root of Number of Words: 4.624 4.7
Average Word Length: 5.166 4.6
Word Length SD: 2.837 2.4
No. of Words greater than 5 chars: 179 100
No. of Words greater than 6 chars: 145 80
No. of Words greater than 7 chars: 99 40
No. of Words greater than 8 chars: 67 20
Use of Passive Voice (%): 0 0
Avg. Sentence Length: 28.562 21.0
Sentence Length SD: 7.583 7.5
Use of Discourse Markers (%): 0.75 0.12
Sentence-Text Coherence: 0.321 0.35
Sentence-Para Coherence: 0.59 0.50
Sentence-Sentence Coherence: 0.069 0.07
Number of Paragraphs: 5 5