The following appeared in a memo from the new vice president of Sartorian, a company that manufactures men's clothing.
"Five years ago, at a time when we had difficulties in obtaining reliable supplies of high quality wool fabric, we discontinued production of our alpaca overcoat. Now that we have a new fabric supplier, we should resume production. This coat should sell very well: since we have not offered an alpaca overcoat for five years and since our major competitor no longer makes an alpaca overcoat, there will be pent-up customer demand. Also, since the price of most types of clothing has increased in each of the past five years, customers should be willing to pay significantly higher prices for alpaca overcoats than they did five years ago, and our company profits will increase."
Write a response in which you discuss what specific evidence is needed to evaluate the argument and explain how the evidence would weaken or strengthen the argument.
In this memo, the author is of the opinion that Sartorian, a company that manufactures men’s clothing should resume production of currently discontinued alpaca overcoat to increase the company’s sales and profits. To buttress the argument, the author states that resuming production of alpaca overcoats may boost consumer demands, that will in turn, increase sales and hence the profits. At first glance, the argument appears to be convincing. However, a closer observation indicates that the argument is vague and poorly reasoned.
Firstly, the author assumes that resuming production of currently discontinued alpaca overcoats will increase the sales figures. To support this, the author cites two reasons – a new fabric supplier and current manufacturing policy of rival company. However, these reasons offer very little explanation for increase in sales figures. Although, a new supplier may solve earlier problem of fabric supplies, it is quite likely that fashion trends have undergone significant changes and hence, alpaca overcoats in this age may be outdated. Similarly, a rival company’s change in manufacturing policy does not necessarily imply Sartorian’s increase in sales.
Secondly, the author predicts that there will be increase in demand for alpaca overcoats. This prediction is rather vague. The author provides no statistical figures and/or logical explanation for the claim. The author merely assumes that rival company’s policy of stopping manufacturing of alpaca overcoats will increase their demand.
Lastly, the author states that consumers will pay higher prices for alpaca overcoats (considering inflation over the years) that would increase Sartorian’s profits. Taking into consideration today’s financial conditions, it is quite likely that consumers have become more aware and frugal with respect to their expenditures and hence may not pay higher prices for alpaca overcoats. Also, higher pricing of alpaca overcoats does not justify that Sartorian makes profits from the same.
To conclude, this argument is unconvincing. To strengthen the argument, the author should precisely explain why Sartorian should resume its production of alpaca overcoats so as to increase its sales and profits in the current financial scenario. Additionally, the author should clearly mention assumptions, statistical figures, if any, to make the argument more cogent.
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No. of Different Words: 162 200
Attribute Value Ideal
Score: 4.5 out of 6
Category: Good Excellent
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No. of Spelling Errors: 0 2
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No. of Words: 353 350
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Sentence Length SD: 8.561 7.5
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Sentence-Text Coherence: 0.361 0.35
Sentence-Para Coherence: 0.57 0.50
Sentence-Sentence Coherence: 0.092 0.07
Number of Paragraphs: 5 5