The following was written as a part of an application for a small business loan by a group of developers in the city of Monroe.
"A jazz music club in Monroe would be a tremendously profitable enterprise. Currently, the nearest jazz club is 65 miles away; thus, our proposed club, the C Note, would have the local market all to itself. Plus, jazz is extremely popular in Monroe: over 100,000 people attended Monroe's jazz festival last summer, several well-known jazz musicians live in Monroe, and the highest-rated radio program in Monroe is 'Jazz Nightly,' which airs every weeknight. Finally, a nationwide study indicates that the typical jazz fan spends close to $1,000 per year on jazz entertainment. It is clear that the C Note cannot help but make money."
For a jazz club to have the local market all to itself, many advantages should be achieved. The location is one of them but the chosen location for the new C Note club would upend the argument.
To set up a project, many factors should be included. The location, with no doubt, plays a fundamental role. Paradoxically, the site suggested for the C Note club has no merit over the site of the other jazz club because person would go outside town to experience a new world. Part of the enjoyment is to spend the holiday in a new place not in the same place where you live your routine life. You can't...
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Comments
Would it be " you can't feel
Would it be " you can't feel that you are in a holiday unless you travel to someplace new" ?
Sentence: You can't feel that you in a holiday unless you travel to someplace new.
Description: The tag a pronoun, personal, nominative, not 3rd person singular is not usually followed by in
Suggestion: Refer to you and in
Attribute Value Ideal
Score: 5.0 out of 6
Category: Very Good Excellent
No. of Grammatical Errors: 1 2
No. of Spelling Errors: 0 2
No. of Sentences: 20 15
No. of Words: 492 350
No. of Characters: 2146 1500
No. of Different Words: 212 200
Fourth Root of Number of Words: 4.71 4.7
Average Word Length: 4.362 4.6
Word Length SD: 2.342 2.4
No. of Words greater than 5 chars: 122 100
No. of Words greater than 6 chars: 89 80
No. of Words greater than 7 chars: 56 40
No. of Words greater than 8 chars: 31 20
Use of Passive Voice (%): 0 0
Avg. Sentence Length: 24.6 21.0
Sentence Length SD: 13.492 7.5
Use of Discourse Markers (%): 0.5 0.12
Sentence-Text Coherence: 0.306 0.35
Sentence-Para Coherence: 0.55 0.50
Sentence-Sentence Coherence: 0.096 0.07
Number of Paragraphs: 6 5