Residents of Lawrence County should elect Thornton Campbell as school superintendent in the next election. Thornton Campbell has served as superintendent for 16 years in neighboring Downs County. Since he became superintendent, Downs County Schools have improved their test scores by 43%. If we elect Campbell, Lawrence County School test scores will improve.
The ad to elect Thornton Campbell as school superintendent for Lawrence Country by residents as he is responsible for the improvement in test scores of neighbouring Down Country schools,where he previously worked as superintendent. Here the ad campaign is failed in providing the reason.
Firstly the ad assumes that Thornton Campbell should be elected as a superintendent in the next election only because during his tenure for last sixteen years as superintendent in neighbouring Down County,those schools have improved their test scores by 43%. Here it is not mention that the cause of those improvement is only due to Campbell’s leadership. What are the measures taken care by Campbell to improve the standards.
Secondly,the add assumes that both the areas are same and if there is possibility of happening one thing there ,then there is equal possibility for it to happen in Lawrence Country. It did not mention anything about students , there might be more students there in Downs Country school than Lawrence Country school who concentrate more on studies. There may be better labs and facilities available at Downs Country school compared to Lawrence Country school.
Atlast the ad campaig assumes that both the schools have same standards in all aspects,but it fails to take into account the quality teaching staff available at both the schools. There may be possibility that teachers at Downs Country Schools are highly qualified compared to those of Lawrence Country School. Teachers there at Downs Country have different ways of teaching which attracts students to class and understanding the lessons perfectly.
In summary, this argument is extremely flawed and unconvincing for the abovementioned reasons. The ad fails to take a complete view of the situation and omits some very important considerations required to assess the merits and issues in this situation. If only the ad had taken all the above points into account and omitted the counterarguments, the line of reasoning would have been considerable strengthened.
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2013-10-08 | Bhagirath93 | 75 | view |
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Sentence: Atlast the ad campaig assumes that both the schools have same standards in all aspects,but it fails to take into account the quality teaching staff available at both the schools.
Error: campaig Suggestion: campaign
flaws:
No. of Words: 326 350
For issue essays, around 450 words, for argument essays, around 400 words.
Argument 1 -- OK
Argument 2 -- OK
Argument 3 -- OK
Attribute Value Ideal
Score: 4.5 out of 6
Category: Good Excellent
No. of Grammatical Errors: 0 2
No. of Spelling Errors: 1 2
No. of Sentences: 14 15
No. of Words: 326 350
No. of Characters: 1688 1500
No. of Different Words: 166 200
Fourth Root of Number of Words: 4.249 4.7
Average Word Length: 5.178 4.6
Word Length SD: 2.928 2.4
No. of Words greater than 5 chars: 127 100
No. of Words greater than 6 chars: 103 80
No. of Words greater than 7 chars: 68 40
No. of Words greater than 8 chars: 39 20
Use of Passive Voice (%): 0 0
Avg. Sentence Length: 23.286 21.0
Sentence Length SD: 8.948 7.5
Use of Discourse Markers (%): 0.5 0.12
Sentence-Text Coherence: 0.346 0.35
Sentence-Para Coherence: 0.624 0.50
Sentence-Sentence Coherence: 0.079 0.07
Number of Paragraphs: 5 5