Claim: Even though young people often receive the advice to “follow your dreams,” more emphasis should be placed on picking worthy goals.
Reason: Many people’s dreams are inherently selfish.
Write a response in which you discuss the extent to which you agree or disagree with the claim AND the reason on which that claim is based.
The author claims that young people should opt for worthy goals, instead of following their dreams. I, for one, believe that having an agenda (being selfish) is of paramount in achieving anything. Dreams are the one thing that keeps us all going. But that does not mean, for example, to dream of becoming a dictator just for the sake of power. Having a selfish aim of growth of ones nation is an amzing dream to have. Not only is it worthy, but is also driven by this mere selfishness.
Firstly, what are worthy goals? It is not necessary that 'worthy goals' and sheer 'dreams' are mutually exclusive. For example, Gandhiji had a dream of free India. Isn't this a worthy goal? It counts as all three - a dream, a worthy goal and also a selfish wish. Therefore, defining the concept of 'worthy goals, here is very important.
Secondly, I do agree that talent without a proper direction can be wasted. Meaning, just having a dream is not sufficient. Weighing it's 'worthiness' gives it a cause. Drives the dreamer to fulfill it with great zeal. For example, the want of becoming a billionaire is just selfish. Unless, the drive behind it was to end up helping others and giving back to the society. "I want to be a billionaire one day and help build a community center for the people in my area, where I grew up looking at the poverty. Building factories will help in having 24 hour electricity and bring jobs to my hometown." That is, I do echo the 'drive' sense of this assertion (worthy goal) made by the author.
All in all, I partially do agree with the author that knowing the worthiness of a dream is something to emphasize on. Else, it is just a one person dream and might not have great consequences that it deserves. However, following ones dreams doesn't always mean it is a selfish act. It could be counted as a worthy goal too.
- Claim: Even though young people often receive the advice to “follow your dreams,” more emphasis should be placed on picking worthy goals.Reason: Many people’s dreams are inherently selfish.Write a response in which you discuss the extent to which 50
- Claim: Even though young people often receive the advice to “follow your dreams,” more emphasis should be placed on picking worthy goals.Reason: Many people’s dreams are inherently selfish.Write a response in which you discuss the extent to which 63
Grammar and spelling errors:
Line 1, column 377, Rule ID: ONES[1]
Message: Did you mean 'one's'?
Suggestion: one's
...ower. Having a selfish aim of growth of ones nation is an amzing dream to have. Not ...
^^^^
Line 3, column 161, Rule ID: EN_CONTRACTION_SPELLING
Message: Possible spelling mistake found
Suggestion: Isn't
...le, Gandhiji had a dream of free India. Isnt this a worthy goal? It counts as all th...
^^^^
Line 7, column 242, Rule ID: EN_CONTRACTION_SPELLING
Message: Possible spelling mistake found
Suggestion: doesn't
...eserves. However, following ones dreams doesnt always mean it is a selfish act. It cou...
^^^^^^
Transition Words or Phrases used:
also, but, first, firstly, however, look, second, secondly, so, therefore, as to, for example
Attributes: Values AverageValues Percentages(Values/AverageValues)% => Comments
Performance on Part of Speech:
To be verbs : 20.0 19.5258426966 102% => OK
Auxiliary verbs: 5.0 12.4196629213 40% => OK
Conjunction : 8.0 14.8657303371 54% => More conjunction wanted.
Relative clauses : 10.0 11.3162921348 88% => OK
Pronoun: 32.0 33.0505617978 97% => OK
Preposition: 33.0 58.6224719101 56% => More preposition wanted.
Nominalization: 2.0 12.9106741573 15% => More nominalizations (nouns with a suffix like: tion ment ence ance) wanted.
Performance on vocabulary words:
No of characters: 1509.0 2235.4752809 68% => OK
No of words: 332.0 442.535393258 75% => More content wanted.
Chars per words: 4.54518072289 5.05705443957 90% => OK
Fourth root words length: 4.2685907696 4.55969084622 94% => OK
Word Length SD: 2.50599476046 2.79657885939 90% => OK
Unique words: 179.0 215.323595506 83% => More unique words wanted.
Unique words percentage: 0.539156626506 0.4932671777 109% => OK
syllable_count: 458.1 704.065955056 65% => OK
avg_syllables_per_word: 1.4 1.59117977528 88% => OK
A sentence (or a clause, phrase) starts by:
Pronoun: 9.0 6.24550561798 144% => OK
Article: 4.0 4.99550561798 80% => OK
Subordination: 0.0 3.10617977528 0% => More adverbial clause wanted.
Conjunction: 2.0 1.77640449438 113% => OK
Preposition: 2.0 4.38483146067 46% => More preposition wanted as sentence beginning.
Performance on sentences:
How many sentences: 24.0 20.2370786517 119% => OK
Sentence length: 13.0 23.0359550562 56% => The Avg. Sentence Length is relatively short.
Sentence length SD: 34.7026055698 60.3974514979 57% => The essay contains lots of sentences with the similar length. More sentence varieties wanted.
Chars per sentence: 62.875 118.986275619 53% => More chars_per_sentence wanted.
Words per sentence: 13.8333333333 23.4991977007 59% => More words per sentence wanted.
Discourse Markers: 3.875 5.21951772744 74% => OK
Paragraphs: 4.0 4.97078651685 80% => OK
Language errors: 3.0 7.80617977528 38% => OK
Sentences with positive sentiment : 17.0 10.2758426966 165% => OK
Sentences with negative sentiment : 6.0 5.13820224719 117% => OK
Sentences with neutral sentiment: 1.0 4.83258426966 21% => More facts, knowledge or examples wanted.
What are sentences with positive/Negative/neutral sentiment?
Coherence and Cohesion:
Essay topic to essay body coherence: 0.177327830131 0.243740707755 73% => OK
Sentence topic coherence: 0.0510524989162 0.0831039109588 61% => OK
Sentence topic coherence SD: 0.0479400071612 0.0758088955206 63% => OK
Paragraph topic coherence: 0.109832562501 0.150359130593 73% => OK
Paragraph topic coherence SD: 0.0155581204861 0.0667264976115 23% => Paragraphs are similar to each other. Some content may get duplicated or it is not exactly right on the topic.
Essay readability:
automated_readability_index: 6.9 14.1392134831 49% => Automated_readability_index is low.
flesch_reading_ease: 75.2 48.8420337079 154% => OK
smog_index: 3.1 7.92365168539 39% => Smog_index is low.
flesch_kincaid_grade: 6.0 12.1743820225 49% => Flesch kincaid grade is low.
coleman_liau_index: 8.52 12.1639044944 70% => OK
dale_chall_readability_score: 7.09 8.38706741573 85% => OK
difficult_words: 59.0 100.480337079 59% => More difficult words wanted.
linsear_write_formula: 5.5 11.8971910112 46% => Linsear_write_formula is low.
gunning_fog: 7.2 11.2143820225 64% => OK
text_standard: 7.0 11.7820224719 59% => The average readability is low. Need to imporve the language.
What are above readability scores?
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Better to have 5/6 paragraphs with 3/4 arguments. And try always support/against one side but compare two sides, like this:
para 1: introduction
para 2: reason 1. address both of the views presented for reason 1
para 3: reason 2. address both of the views presented for reason 2
para 4: reason 3. address both of the views presented for reason 3
para 5: reason 4. address both of the views presented for reason 4 (optional)
para 6: conclusion.
Rates: 50.0 out of 100
Scores by essay e-grader: 3.0 Out of 6
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Note: the e-grader does NOT examine the meaning of words and ideas. VIP users will receive further evaluations by advanced module of e-grader and human graders.