High schools should eliminate their art and music programs to make room for more extensive studies in mathematics and English. Test scores in mathematics and English are of paramount interest to colleges most student wish to attend, while art and music classes are mere electives of little use to students who do not intend to pursue career in such creative fields.
Write a response that expresses the degree to which you agree or disagree with the claim and the reason or reasons that underlie the claim.
While English and mathematics are often considered the most important subjects in college admission processes and careers, art and music are valuable subjects that should not be eliminated in high school curiculums. As a cornerstone of our society, art and music can teach us about what current and past societies value. Additionally, art and music can hone students abilities in the more "important" subjects by teaching skills such as analysis, discipline, and improvisation. These skills are taught in a different way than the core subjects and can expose students to a new way of learning and interpretation. It would be a disservice to high schoolers to eliminate these subjects from their education and would ultimately produce students less prepared for college and their careers.
For as long as humans have been recording history, art and music have played an integral role in societies' cultures. The study of the arts involves the study of past works of art and pieces of music which allows students to learn about history and what different societies valued. For example, the style of art during a time period often reflects the current conditions of a culture; e.g., the renaissance artists innovating art reflected the growth in the technologies of the time periods. Similarity, the art and music of today can reveal much about the current issues of our time. If we were to eliminate art and music, students would not get the opportunity to connect the arts to culture and gain a greater understanding of humanities' values.
Art and music also allow students to learn important skills that both mirror and enhance the skills students learn in core subjects. For example, interpreting a painting is a skill that mirrors interpreting a book in English class; it requires students to think outside the box and use context clues to come to conclusions. Because art is often more abstract than the written word, interpreting art and can be more challenging and ultimately more rewarding. In addition, practicing music requires a great deal of discipline, an important skill for college and the workplace. To learn an instrument, students must devote many hours to what can be a boring practice to perform well. The act of grinding away at something to improve oneself is an important skill that other subjects emphasize less. Students who struggle with English and math may find that they excel in art and music, and can therefore gain beneficial skills in a different way than in the core subjects.
Art and music are at the forefront of our society for a reason – they reflect our culture and allow us to think in new and different ways. It is important for students to recognize this and learn these subjects so they can succeed in college and beyond.
Grammar and spelling errors:
Line 1, column 513, Rule ID: IN_A_X_MANNER[1]
Message: Consider replacing "in a different way" with adverb for "different"; eg, "in a hasty manner" with "hastily".
... improvisation. These skills are taught in a different way than the core subjects and can expose s...
^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^
Line 5, column 906, Rule ID: WHITESPACE_RULE
Message: Possible typo: you repeated a whitespace
Suggestion:
...in art and music, and can therefore gain beneficial skills in a different way tha...
^^
Line 5, column 926, Rule ID: IN_A_X_MANNER[1]
Message: Consider replacing "in a different way" with adverb for "different"; eg, "in a hasty manner" with "hastily".
...d can therefore gain beneficial skills in a different way than in the core subjects. Art and ...
^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^
Transition Words or Phrases used:
also, e.g., if, may, so, therefore, well, while, for example, in addition, such as
Attributes: Values AverageValues Percentages(Values/AverageValues)% => Comments
Performance on Part of Speech:
To be verbs : 14.0 19.5258426966 72% => OK
Auxiliary verbs: 14.0 12.4196629213 113% => OK
Conjunction : 31.0 14.8657303371 209% => Less conjunction wanted
Relative clauses : 7.0 11.3162921348 62% => More relative clauses wanted.
Pronoun: 25.0 33.0505617978 76% => OK
Preposition: 59.0 58.6224719101 101% => OK
Nominalization: 7.0 12.9106741573 54% => More nominalizations (nouns with a suffix like: tion ment ence ance) wanted.
Performance on vocabulary words:
No of characters: 2324.0 2235.4752809 104% => OK
No of words: 462.0 442.535393258 104% => OK
Chars per words: 5.0303030303 5.05705443957 99% => OK
Fourth root words length: 4.63618218583 4.55969084622 102% => OK
Word Length SD: 2.88149792695 2.79657885939 103% => OK
Unique words: 209.0 215.323595506 97% => OK
Unique words percentage: 0.452380952381 0.4932671777 92% => More unique words wanted or less content wanted.
syllable_count: 715.5 704.065955056 102% => OK
avg_syllables_per_word: 1.5 1.59117977528 94% => OK
A sentence (or a clause, phrase) starts by:
Pronoun: 4.0 6.24550561798 64% => OK
Article: 6.0 4.99550561798 120% => OK
Subordination: 4.0 3.10617977528 129% => OK
Conjunction: 2.0 1.77640449438 113% => OK
Preposition: 2.0 4.38483146067 46% => More preposition wanted as sentence beginning.
Performance on sentences:
How many sentences: 19.0 20.2370786517 94% => OK
Sentence length: 24.0 23.0359550562 104% => OK
Sentence length SD: 35.5001463069 60.3974514979 59% => The essay contains lots of sentences with the similar length. More sentence varieties wanted.
Chars per sentence: 122.315789474 118.986275619 103% => OK
Words per sentence: 24.3157894737 23.4991977007 103% => OK
Discourse Markers: 4.31578947368 5.21951772744 83% => OK
Paragraphs: 4.0 4.97078651685 80% => OK
Language errors: 3.0 7.80617977528 38% => OK
Sentences with positive sentiment : 16.0 10.2758426966 156% => OK
Sentences with negative sentiment : 1.0 5.13820224719 19% => More negative sentences wanted.
Sentences with neutral sentiment: 2.0 4.83258426966 41% => OK
What are sentences with positive/Negative/neutral sentiment?
Coherence and Cohesion:
Essay topic to essay body coherence: 0.32841447496 0.243740707755 135% => OK
Sentence topic coherence: 0.111300402543 0.0831039109588 134% => OK
Sentence topic coherence SD: 0.0705756834979 0.0758088955206 93% => OK
Paragraph topic coherence: 0.206449236864 0.150359130593 137% => OK
Paragraph topic coherence SD: 0.0613546311535 0.0667264976115 92% => OK
Essay readability:
automated_readability_index: 14.4 14.1392134831 102% => OK
flesch_reading_ease: 55.58 48.8420337079 114% => OK
smog_index: 8.8 7.92365168539 111% => OK
flesch_kincaid_grade: 11.5 12.1743820225 94% => OK
coleman_liau_index: 12.19 12.1639044944 100% => OK
dale_chall_readability_score: 8.11 8.38706741573 97% => OK
difficult_words: 96.0 100.480337079 96% => OK
linsear_write_formula: 12.0 11.8971910112 101% => OK
gunning_fog: 11.6 11.2143820225 103% => OK
text_standard: 12.0 11.7820224719 102% => OK
What are above readability scores?
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Better to have 5/6 paragraphs with 3/4 arguments. And try always support/against one side but compare two sides, like this:
para 1: introduction
para 2: reason 1. address both of the views presented for reason 1
para 3: reason 2. address both of the views presented for reason 2
para 4: reason 3. address both of the views presented for reason 3
para 5: reason 4. address both of the views presented for reason 4 (optional)
para 6: conclusion.
Rates: 50.0 out of 100
Scores by essay e-grader: 3.0 Out of 6
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Note: the e-grader does NOT examine the meaning of words and ideas. VIP users will receive further evaluations by advanced module of e-grader and human graders.