Young people should be encouraged to pursue long-term, realistic goals rather than seek immediate fame and recognition.
It is a human nature to accomplish work by putting as less effort as it is needed to do it; we (humans) always want to move through a short-cut path. In that sense, it can be asserted that it is human propensity to “seek immediate fame and recognition” rather than “pursue long-term realistic goals”, that requires higher effort and time. However, short-term fame has many disadvantages attached with it, that makes it a lesser worthy accomplishment than long-term goals.
Firstly, encouraging short-term fame among youth aids in eliminating the culture of hard-work, inviting tendency to work with lesser effort and expect better results. But, less effort, most of the times, doesn’t give better results. This failure to gain better results can make youth vulnerable to tension and anxiety. In this twenty-first century, for instance, there are myriad of ways to gain fame overnight- one can put a video on youtube, post one interesting post in social media or anything as such, and majority of youth tend to try these procedures to gain short-term fame, but rarely such efforts give any sensible outcome. This may invite sadness, anxiety and sense of low self-esteem among youths. So, it is always better to encourage youths to pursue long-term goals with harder effort, as success is much more guaranteed in it than any efforts for short-term fame.
Similarly, short-term fame remains for a very short period of time, after which one returns to same position as before. The characters of many YouTube viral videos, for instance, remain famous in the platform for a very short period of time. Sudden plunge in fame and popularity, in many instances, becomes the cause of sadness and depression in many youths. A singer named Yama in Nepal, for instance, was very popular for one song that he had published in youtube, but he couldn’t give continuity to the quality that he had delivered in first instance. That slowly dwindled his fame among public, and eventually led him to depression. But, there are many famous singers in Nepal (like Narayan Gopal) who struggled a lot to reach to their position and eventually had an indelible footprint in their field.
Finally, though it might seem worthy to work for short term fame that gives us height of success with lesser effort, short-term fame eliminates the culture of hard-work, doesn’t guarantee success, and even if someone achieves, it is ephemeral nature. Therefore, it is always worthy to put harder effort to gain long-term goals that are indelible and satisfying.
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Grammar and spelling errors:
Line 7, column 516, Rule ID: WHITESPACE_RULE
Message: Possible typo: you repeated a whitespace
Suggestion:
...in social media or anything as such, and majority of youth tend to try these proc...
^^
Line 9, column 53, Rule ID: PERIOD_OF_TIME[1]
Message: Use simply 'period'.
Suggestion: period
...hort-term fame remains for a very short period of time, after which one returns to same positi...
^^^^^^^^^^^^^^
Line 9, column 227, Rule ID: PERIOD_OF_TIME[1]
Message: Use simply 'period'.
Suggestion: period
...famous in the platform for a very short period of time. Sudden plunge in fame and popularity, ...
^^^^^^^^^^^^^^
Transition Words or Phrases used:
but, finally, first, firstly, however, if, may, similarly, so, therefore, for instance, in short
Attributes: Values AverageValues Percentages(Values/AverageValues)% => Comments
Performance on Part of Speech:
To be verbs : 12.0 19.5258426966 61% => OK
Auxiliary verbs: 5.0 12.4196629213 40% => OK
Conjunction : 15.0 14.8657303371 101% => OK
Relative clauses : 11.0 11.3162921348 97% => OK
Pronoun: 34.0 33.0505617978 103% => OK
Preposition: 58.0 58.6224719101 99% => OK
Nominalization: 8.0 12.9106741573 62% => OK
Performance on vocabulary words:
No of characters: 2157.0 2235.4752809 96% => OK
No of words: 418.0 442.535393258 94% => More content wanted.
Chars per words: 5.16028708134 5.05705443957 102% => OK
Fourth root words length: 4.52162009685 4.55969084622 99% => OK
Word Length SD: 2.81510644458 2.79657885939 101% => OK
Unique words: 224.0 215.323595506 104% => OK
Unique words percentage: 0.535885167464 0.4932671777 109% => OK
syllable_count: 666.0 704.065955056 95% => OK
avg_syllables_per_word: 1.6 1.59117977528 101% => OK
A sentence (or a clause, phrase) starts by:
Pronoun: 11.0 6.24550561798 176% => OK
Article: 2.0 4.99550561798 40% => OK
Subordination: 3.0 3.10617977528 97% => OK
Conjunction: 5.0 1.77640449438 281% => Less conjunction wanted as sentence beginning.
Preposition: 4.0 4.38483146067 91% => OK
Performance on sentences:
How many sentences: 17.0 20.2370786517 84% => Need more sentences. Double check the format of sentences, make sure there is a space between two sentences, or have enough periods. And also check the lengths of sentences, maybe they are too long.
Sentence length: 24.0 23.0359550562 104% => OK
Sentence length SD: 64.5672311288 60.3974514979 107% => OK
Chars per sentence: 126.882352941 118.986275619 107% => OK
Words per sentence: 24.5882352941 23.4991977007 105% => OK
Discourse Markers: 5.64705882353 5.21951772744 108% => OK
Paragraphs: 4.0 4.97078651685 80% => OK
Language errors: 3.0 7.80617977528 38% => OK
Sentences with positive sentiment : 12.0 10.2758426966 117% => OK
Sentences with negative sentiment : 4.0 5.13820224719 78% => OK
Sentences with neutral sentiment: 1.0 4.83258426966 21% => More facts, knowledge or examples wanted.
What are sentences with positive/Negative/neutral sentiment?
Coherence and Cohesion:
Essay topic to essay body coherence: 0.21234832753 0.243740707755 87% => OK
Sentence topic coherence: 0.0709836855481 0.0831039109588 85% => OK
Sentence topic coherence SD: 0.0892273218028 0.0758088955206 118% => OK
Paragraph topic coherence: 0.143408676621 0.150359130593 95% => OK
Paragraph topic coherence SD: 0.0826717499622 0.0667264976115 124% => OK
Essay readability:
automated_readability_index: 15.2 14.1392134831 108% => OK
flesch_reading_ease: 47.12 48.8420337079 96% => OK
smog_index: 8.8 7.92365168539 111% => OK
flesch_kincaid_grade: 12.7 12.1743820225 104% => OK
coleman_liau_index: 12.94 12.1639044944 106% => OK
dale_chall_readability_score: 8.98 8.38706741573 107% => OK
difficult_words: 110.0 100.480337079 109% => OK
linsear_write_formula: 14.0 11.8971910112 118% => OK
gunning_fog: 11.6 11.2143820225 103% => OK
text_standard: 13.0 11.7820224719 110% => OK
What are above readability scores?
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Better to have 5/6 paragraphs with 3/4 arguments. And try always support/against one side but compare two sides, like this:
para 1: introduction
para 2: reason 1. address both of the views presented for reason 1
para 3: reason 2. address both of the views presented for reason 2
para 4: reason 3. address both of the views presented for reason 3
para 5: reason 4. address both of the views presented for reason 4 (optional)
para 6: conclusion.
Rates: 66.67 out of 100
Scores by essay e-grader: 4.0 Out of 6
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Note: the e-grader does NOT examine the meaning of words and ideas. VIP users will receive further evaluations by advanced module of e-grader and human graders.