Essay topic:
You are a student at an English language school in Brighton and are living in private accommodation with other flat mates. You have not had hot water or heating for some time. The landlord’s workmen have tried to fix the problem but without success.
Dear Mr.David,
We are your tenants for the last 2 months, in your apartment number 253 building 2. The prospect of writing this letter is to make your attention towards the issue, that we are facing since last night.
Me and my flat mates faced this issue, first time, when we came from our language school. We are unable to have hot water in your apartment. Your workmen did visit the apartment but he could not have made it proper.
His findings are, either to have a new boiler or replace the thermostat of the boiler, if someone can get it from the market. Fortunately I went to the market and found the same thermostat from their and it is very cheap.
As per our suggestion, it is feasible to replace the thermostat of the boiler rather then to buy a new boiler which is expensive. Kindly grant some money as soon as possible to your workmen so that he can buy and replace the thermostat, as you are aware of the fact that its winter season and its really hard to live without hot water.
Thanks
Yours Sincerely,
Umairnom
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Sentence: Your workmen did visit the apartment but he could not have made it proper.
Description: The fragment it proper . is rare
Suggestion: Possible agreement error: Replace proper with adverb
Sentence: Fortunately I went to the market and found the same thermostat from their and it is very cheap.
Description: The tag a determiner, possessive is not usually followed by and
Suggestion: Refer to their and and
Sentence: As per our suggestion, it is feasible to replace the thermostat of the boiler rather then to buy a new boiler which is expensive.
Description: The fragment rather then to is rare
Suggestion: Possible agreement error: Replace then with than
Attribute Value Ideal
Score: 7.0 out of 9
Category: Good Excellent
No. of Grammatical Errors: 3 2
No. of Spelling Errors: 0 2
No. of Sentences: 9 10
No. of Words: 184 200
No. of Characters: 775 1000
No. of Different Words: 109 100
Fourth Root of Number of Words: 3.683 4.7
Average Word Length: 4.212 4.6
Word Length SD: 2.165 2.4
No. of Words greater than 5 chars: 46 60
No. of Words greater than 6 chars: 27 50
No. of Words greater than 7 chars: 17 40
No. of Words greater than 8 chars: 11 20
Use of Passive Voice (%): 0 0
Avg. Sentence Length: 20.444 21.0
Sentence Length SD: 8.139 7.5
Use of Discourse Markers (%): 0.556 0.12
Sentence-Text Coherence: 0.417 0.35
Sentence-Para Coherence: 0.713 0.50
Sentence-Sentence Coherence: 0.244 0.07
Number of Paragraphs: 4 4