in many parts of the world, children's lives were very different from today.
what do you think were the advantages and disadvantages of life for children in the past?
Life is changed day by day especially for children’s lives in the past are not same than nowadays. There were advantages and disadvantages of children life in the past.
I believe there were three main benefits. Firstly, they usually spent free time playing outside with other children who lived nearby, so they could learn social skill. They also enjoyed dangerous activities like climbing trees or swimming in rivers. Secondly, children preferred walking home from school rather than being taken in their parent’s car. Because of that, they could become independent person and more responsibility. What is more, children became friendly because they spent more time with family member, such as: dinner together, hanging out, and playing games. Whilst children shared their time with their family, they can learn about good behavior, attitudes, and good manner rather than children who spent time with babysitters, for example. Family is the most influences to build children characteristic.
However, there were also several disadvantages. Firstly, in the past there were no TVs and computers or mobile phone. This made them less insight and sophisticated technology. It makes they did not completely improve their skill. Secondly, they were not being under pressure to be successful at school because they had relaxed way of life. So, because of that they have not great ability to get great future.
In conclusion, there were clear advantages and disadvantages to children’s lives in the past. In my view, children who lives in old time still can improved their ability if they lots of effort such as: study hard, and have willingness to get excellent future.
| Post date | Users | Rates | Link to Content |
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| 2013-10-17 | fikri | 70 | view |
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Life is changed day by day especially for children’s lives in the past are not same than nowadays.
Description: two verbs in one sentence.
Sentence: There were advantages and disadvantages of children life in the past.
Description: A noun, plural, common is not usually followed by a noun, singular, common
Suggestion: Refer to children and life
Sentence: In my view, children who lives in old time still can improved their ability if they lots of effort such as: study hard, and have willingness to get excellent future.
Description: A modal auxillary is not usually followed by a verb, past participle
Suggestion: Refer to can and improved
Description: A pronoun, personal, nominative, not 3rd person singular is not usually followed by a noun, plural, common
Suggestion: Refer to they and lots
It makes they did not completely improve their skill.
Suggestion: Can you re-write this sentence?
still can improved their ability if they lots of effort such as...
Description: where is the verb for this sentence?
flaws:
Avg. Sentence Length: 14.778 21.0
No. of Grammatical Errors: 6 2
Read a good grammar book.
Attribute Value Ideal
Score: 5.0 out of 9
Category: Satisfactory Excellent
No. of Grammatical Errors: 6 2
No. of Spelling Errors: 0 2
No. of Sentences: 18 15
No. of Words: 266 350
No. of Characters: 1356 1500
No. of Different Words: 156 200
Fourth Root of Number of Words: 4.039 4.7
Average Word Length: 5.098 4.6
Word Length SD: 2.537 2.4
No. of Words greater than 5 chars: 90 100
No. of Words greater than 6 chars: 68 80
No. of Words greater than 7 chars: 45 40
No. of Words greater than 8 chars: 25 20
Use of Passive Voice (%): 0 0
Avg. Sentence Length: 14.778 21.0
Sentence Length SD: 6.762 7.5
Use of Discourse Markers (%): 0.611 0.12
Sentence-Text Coherence: 0.317 0.35
Sentence-Para Coherence: 0.488 0.50
Sentence-Sentence Coherence: 0.089 0.07
Number of Paragraphs: 4 5