More children are becoming obese, compared with 50 years ago. Fast food outlets are responsible for their expanding waistlines.
To what extent do you agree with this statement?
One of the most controversial issues today is related to the increasing rate of obesity. It is clear that a plethora of overweight children are accounted by fast food consumption. Whilst it is possible to claim that this phenomenon is due to fast food outlets, I personally believe that there are other factors that contribute to this matter. Therefore, in this essay, I shall further elaborate my point of view by analysing this issue.
Perhaps, the greatest reasons for juvenile to consume fast food are its convenience as well as tastefulness. However, these meals contain high calories, including fats, cholesterol and carbohydrates. If one consumes it on a daily basis, it might be deleterious to one’s health as well as expanding their waistlines. Despite its advertisement regarding fast food being nutritious, these meals possess limited nutrients, vegetables or fibres which are considered as the essential part in the food pyramid. In short, consuming convenient food has negative impact on juvenile weight.
Not everything, however, about obesity among juvenile are related to fast food. It is clear that youngsters nowadays are physically less active than half a century ago. Whilst many of them are living a luxurious life, walking or cycling to school is uncommon. Moreover, children prefer indoor activities such as playing computer games or watching television rather than outdoor games. This suggests that the young participate less in physical activities which are beneficial to their health as well as maintaining one’s ideal weight.
In a nutshell, it is evident that obesity among children is devoted to fast food, not least because its low nutritious value and high fat content. This is however also caused by physical inactivity among children. I personally believe that fast food is not the major cause of obesity among children as it is a multi-factorial problem.
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2013-11-25 | Zhingyilow | 75 | view |
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Sentence: Therefore, in this essay, I shall further elaborate my point of view by analysing this issue.
Error: analysing Suggestion: analyzing
Attribute Value Ideal
Score: 7.0 out of 9
Category: Good Excellent
No. of Grammatical Errors: 0 2
No. of Spelling Errors: 1 2
No. of Sentences: 17 15
No. of Words: 301 350
No. of Characters: 1551 1500
No. of Different Words: 173 200
Fourth Root of Number of Words: 4.165 4.7
Average Word Length: 5.153 4.6
Word Length SD: 2.84 2.4
No. of Words greater than 5 chars: 114 100
No. of Words greater than 6 chars: 97 80
No. of Words greater than 7 chars: 65 40
No. of Words greater than 8 chars: 42 20
Use of Passive Voice (%): 0 0
Avg. Sentence Length: 17.706 21.0
Sentence Length SD: 5.539 7.5
Use of Discourse Markers (%): 0.588 0.12
Sentence-Text Coherence: 0.314 0.35
Sentence-Para Coherence: 0.509 0.50
Sentence-Sentence Coherence: 0.054 0.07
Number of Paragraphs: 4 5