Television is dangerous because it destroys family life and any sense of community; instead of visiting people or talking with our family we just watch television.
To what extent do you agree or disagree with this opinion?
In today's world, people are more expose to technology compare to life back then. With technology such as television, it has given people an easy access into information. But however, spending too much time watching tv could bring impact to family relationship as well as to the community.
Generally, I do agree that television could jeopardise the bonding between family as well as the environment. In addition, television could also influence how people act and behave towards other. For example, if a program that shows less education such as criminal, gossip could cause the watcher to act upon it. More over, nowadays there are more children doing criminal which might have been caused from the exposure of criminal news in showing how thief commit their crime. Aside, children especially are more attractive to television program such as live music, gossip, fashion etc which eventually prefered them to spend time waiting for their favourite program rather than spending quality time with family and friends.
On the other hand, I disagree that television could bring bad effect to family or community. In other way, television allowed the watcher to know a lot of information such as from news. It enable us to be aware of the things happening around the world. In this way, we can discuss and share with the family as well as community on the event that is happening around us and perhaps by discussing, this could make the relationship between family and peers better.
In conclusion, people should understand the amount of time that they should spend in watching tv. Aside, people should also choose tv program wisely in which it can educate them rather than giving bad influence. Lastly, people should include their family, peers and relative to watch tv together as this could strengthen their relationship rather than watching tv alone.
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Sentence: In today's world, people are more expose to technology compare to life back then.
Description: The fragment technology compare to is rare
Suggestion: Possible agreement error: Replace compare with compared
Sentence: It enable us to be aware of the things happening around the world.
Description: The fragment It enable us is rare
Suggestion: Possible agreement error: Replace enable with verb, past tense
But however
But or however
Sentence: Generally, I do agree that television could jeopardise the bonding between family as well as the environment.
Error: jeopardise Suggestion: jeopardize
Attribute Value Ideal
Score: 6.5 out of 9
Category: Good Excellent
No. of Grammatical Errors: 3 2
No. of Spelling Errors: 0 2
No. of Sentences: 15 15
No. of Words: 305 350
No. of Characters: 1510 1500
No. of Different Words: 160 200
Fourth Root of Number of Words: 4.179 4.7
Average Word Length: 4.951 4.6
Word Length SD: 2.476 2.4
No. of Words greater than 5 chars: 112 100
No. of Words greater than 6 chars: 73 80
No. of Words greater than 7 chars: 49 40
No. of Words greater than 8 chars: 32 20
Use of Passive Voice (%): 0 0
Avg. Sentence Length: 20.333 21.0
Sentence Length SD: 7.587 7.5
Use of Discourse Markers (%): 0.867 0.12
Sentence-Text Coherence: 0.352 0.35
Sentence-Para Coherence: 0.562 0.50
Sentence-Sentence Coherence: 0.16 0.07
Number of Paragraphs: 4 5