Hello! I'm preparing for my IELTS exam. I chosed this question from Cambridge IELTS 7 (test 2). I'm hoping for some comments. Thank you very much!The graph below shows the consumption of fish and some different kinds of meat in a European country between

Essay topics:

Hello! I'm preparing for my IELTS exam. I chosed this question from Cambridge IELTS 7 (test 2). I'm hoping for some comments. Thank you very much!
The graph below shows the consumption of fish and some different kinds of meat in a European country between 1979 and 2004.
Summarise the information by selecting and reporting the main features, and make comparisons where relevant.

The line graph gives the information about the use of four type of meat in the European country from 1979 to 2004.
Overall, there was more fluctuation in chicken, beef and lamp in 25 years. On the beside that, although the consumption of fish decreased slightly, there wasn’t any large change in the period of time.
It can be seen from the graph before 1989, the consumption of beef was the highest, and reached a pick of about 250 grams in 1983. The figures for chicken and lamp were lower, but they have a different trend, the increase for chicken and the decrease for lamb. However, fish had the lowest number with about 50 grams.
In the period between 1989 and 2004, the European country witnessed a significant growth in the consumption of chicken, about 250 grams in 2004. On beside that, there was a powerful decrease in beef and lamp, 100 grams of beef compared to about 60 grams of lamp in 2004. The consumption of fish was the lowest and remain above 50 grams per person per week.

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Average: 6.7 (1 vote)
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2018-08-02 romeotranlk94 67 view

Comments

Grammar and spelling errors:
Line 2, column 190, Rule ID: PERIOD_OF_TIME[1]
Message: Use simply 'period'.
Suggestion: period
...ere wasn't any large change in the period of time. It can be seen from the graph before ...
^^^^^^^^^^^^^^

Transition Words or Phrases used:
but, however, if, so

Attributes: Values AverageValues Percentages(Values/AverageValues)% => Comments

Performance on Part of Speech:
To be verbs : 6.0 7.0 86% => OK
Auxiliary verbs: 1.0 1.00243902439 100% => OK
Conjunction : 8.0 6.8 118% => OK
Relative clauses : 2.0 3.15609756098 63% => OK
Pronoun: 4.0 5.60731707317 71% => OK
Preposition: 37.0 33.7804878049 110% => OK
Nominalization: 6.0 3.97073170732 151% => OK

Performance on vocabulary words:
No of characters: 824.0 965.302439024 85% => OK
No of words: 180.0 196.424390244 92% => More content wanted.
Chars per words: 4.57777777778 4.92477711251 93% => OK
Fourth root words length: 3.66284150148 3.73543355544 98% => OK
Word Length SD: 2.36267268622 2.65546596893 89% => OK
Unique words: 92.0 106.607317073 86% => More unique words wanted.
Unique words percentage: 0.511111111111 0.547539520022 93% => More unique words wanted or less content wanted.
syllable_count: 229.5 283.868780488 81% => OK
avg_syllables_per_word: 1.3 1.45097560976 90% => OK

A sentence (or a clause, phrase) starts by:
Pronoun: 1.0 1.53170731707 65% => OK
Article: 6.0 4.33902439024 138% => OK
Subordination: 1.0 1.07073170732 93% => OK
Conjunction: 2.0 0.482926829268 414% => Less conjunction wanted as sentence beginning.
Preposition: 4.0 3.36585365854 119% => OK

Performance on sentences:
How many sentences: 9.0 8.94146341463 101% => OK
Sentence length: 20.0 22.4926829268 89% => OK
Sentence length SD: 28.6627904356 43.030603864 67% => OK
Chars per sentence: 91.5555555556 112.824112599 81% => OK
Words per sentence: 20.0 22.9334400587 87% => OK
Discourse Markers: 2.22222222222 5.23603664747 42% => More transition words/phrases wanted.
Paragraphs: 4.0 3.83414634146 104% => OK
Language errors: 1.0 1.69756097561 59% => OK
Sentences with positive sentiment : 4.0 3.70975609756 108% => OK
Sentences with negative sentiment : 2.0 1.13902439024 176% => OK
Sentences with neutral sentiment: 3.0 4.09268292683 73% => OK
What are sentences with positive/Negative/neutral sentiment?

Coherence and Cohesion:
Essay topic to essay body coherence: 0.141697786911 0.215688989381 66% => OK
Sentence topic coherence: 0.0607048191211 0.103423049105 59% => OK
Sentence topic coherence SD: 0.0444644951933 0.0843802449381 53% => OK
Paragraph topic coherence: 0.0942623367266 0.15604864568 60% => OK
Paragraph topic coherence SD: 0.031865173353 0.0819641961636 39% => Paragraphs are similar to each other. Some content may get duplicated or it is not exactly right on the topic.

Essay readability:
automated_readability_index: 10.1 13.2329268293 76% => Automated_readability_index is low.
flesch_reading_ease: 76.56 61.2550243902 125% => OK
smog_index: 3.1 6.51609756098 48% => Smog_index is low.
flesch_kincaid_grade: 7.6 10.3012195122 74% => OK
coleman_liau_index: 9.28 11.4140731707 81% => OK
dale_chall_readability_score: 6.65 8.06136585366 82% => OK
difficult_words: 23.0 40.7170731707 56% => More difficult words wanted.
linsear_write_formula: 9.0 11.4329268293 79% => OK
gunning_fog: 10.0 10.9970731707 91% => OK
text_standard: 10.0 11.0658536585 90% => OK
What are above readability scores?

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Rates: 67.4157303371 out of 100
Scores by essay e-grader: 6.0 Out of 9
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Note: the e-grader does NOT examine the meaning of words and ideas. VIP users will receive further evaluations by advanced module of e-grader and human graders.