The percentage of overweight children in western society has increased by almost 20% in the last ten years. Discuss the causes and effects of this disturbing trend.
Present a written argument to an educated reader with no specialist knowledge of the following topic.
Give reasons for your answer and include any relevant examples from your own experience or knowledge.
Nowadays, there is concern about considerable increase in number of overweight children in American countries. what is the causes of this worrying increase?. what the effects will be?
First of all, poorness in energy balance is one of causes of obesity. when receiving energy is equal to used energy the energy balance is occurred. However, most children in western society are eating too much and they do not use the energy that they gain by feeding. As a result, the amount of energy in is more than the amount of energy out. So, this causes obesity in children. Moreover, the source of being overweight is fast food which is very popular in western countries.
Second reason for being overweight is advertisement especially in American countries. Children see a tons of nice-looking candies and food in TV and Journals. Hence, it is impossible to keep them away from this kind of foods. Parents should be careful and they should be aware of what reprehensible results can inappropriate adverts can cause. Furthermore, the content of food is also important. parents should not feed their children by foods which has high calorie levels.
Being overweight has catastrophic results especially for youth. If people are overweight in their childhood then health problems are inescapable in future. Furthermore, obesity has effect of inactive lifestyle. because of being overweight people are becoming less active. Moreover, breathing and moving is difficult for children who are fat because of more weight then needed.
To sum up, The reasons of being overweight for children is lack of energy balance and advertisements. The effects are unhealthy and inactive lifestyle. Moreover, breathing and moving problems are also effects of being overweight.
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there is concern about considerable increase in number of overweight children
there is a concern about the considerable increase in number of overweight children
by foods which has high calorie levels.
by foods which have high calorie levels.
Sentence: Parents should be careful and they should be aware of what reprehensible results can inappropriate adverts can cause.
Description: A modal auxillary is not usually followed by an adjective
Suggestion: Refer to can and inappropriate
more weight then needed.
more weight than needed.
flaws:
No. of Grammatical Errors: 4 2
No. of Different Words: 143 200
Attribute Value Ideal
Score: 6.5 out of 9
Category: Good Excellent
No. of Grammatical Errors: 4 2
No. of Spelling Errors: 0 2
No. of Sentences: 18 15
No. of Words: 280 350
No. of Characters: 1429 1500
No. of Different Words: 143 200
Fourth Root of Number of Words: 4.091 4.7
Average Word Length: 5.104 4.6
Word Length SD: 2.749 2.4
No. of Words greater than 5 chars: 118 100
No. of Words greater than 6 chars: 85 80
No. of Words greater than 7 chars: 57 40
No. of Words greater than 8 chars: 33 20
Use of Passive Voice (%): 0 0
Avg. Sentence Length: 15.556 21.0
Sentence Length SD: 5.89 7.5
Use of Discourse Markers (%): 0.722 0.12
Sentence-Text Coherence: 0.312 0.35
Sentence-Para Coherence: 0.545 0.50
Sentence-Sentence Coherence: 0.08 0.07
Number of Paragraphs: 5 5