A person’s worth nowadays seems to be judged according to social status and material possessions. Old fashioned values, such as honour, kindness, and trust no longer seem important.To what extent do you agree or disagree with this opinion
Today, in modern age wherein flashy things can caught our attention easily with the use of moving advertisements and hard to believe product transformations from luxury cars, clothes and shoes that are expensive to name a few. Sad to say that these material things can judge a person on what society they belong. Having judged by man made products can put the social status way up and most people set rules to be idolized.
In my personal point of view, I disagree to let the social class divides people that can afford to the people who cannot. Unfortunately, even the ones who does not have mean were trying to fit in materialistic world. Some people drowned in debts just to get the label "socialite" Things that are more meaningful to them are by getting a big house, nice cars, update gadgets, work designation and government officials.
In my case, the most important are the traits that no one can buy. Being kind-hearted towards others will effect the person on how they wanted to be treated. There is a saying "Golden Rule" it means: Do not do unto others what you would not want the others do unto you. Another trait is to keep your integrity intact. Alongside is being trustworthy, and these characters will live by your name with honour and proud.
Furthermore, people should be more aware of how they treat others than paying attention on material things. Parent should remind their children that these material possessions are what you wanted in life but unnecessary. What matters most are the basic needs in this life. Even to those who can afford such expensive products, make sure to find peace and humility in their hearts.
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2015-04-21 | boxu.zhang | 70 | view |
2015-04-14 | jules.inocencio | 60 | view |
2014-11-25 | hasan90issam | 98 | view |
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Sentence: Today, in modern age wherein flashy things can caught our attention easily with the use of moving advertisements
Description: A modal auxillary is not usually followed by a verb, past participle
Suggestion: Refer to can and caught
can judge a person on what society they belong.
Description: 'they' refers to what? Be sensitive to use pronoun.
let the social class divides people
let the social class divide people
even the ones who does not have
even the ones who do not have
the most important are the traits
the most important things are the traits
will effect the person
will affect the person
flaws:
No. of Grammatical Errors: 6 2
Attribute Value Ideal
Score: 5.0 out of 9
Category: Satisfactory Excellent
No. of Grammatical Errors: 6 2
No. of Spelling Errors: 0 2
No. of Sentences: 16 15
No. of Words: 285 350
No. of Characters: 1323 1500
No. of Different Words: 178 200
Fourth Root of Number of Words: 4.109 4.7
Average Word Length: 4.642 4.6
Word Length SD: 2.425 2.4
No. of Words greater than 5 chars: 91 100
No. of Words greater than 6 chars: 45 80
No. of Words greater than 7 chars: 32 40
No. of Words greater than 8 chars: 22 20
Use of Passive Voice (%): 0 0
Avg. Sentence Length: 17.812 21.0
Sentence Length SD: 6.56 7.5
Use of Discourse Markers (%): 0.125 0.12
Sentence-Text Coherence: 0.293 0.35
Sentence-Para Coherence: 0.511 0.50
Sentence-Sentence Coherence: 0.086 0.07
Number of Paragraphs: 4 5