some people think certain prisoners should be made to unpaid community work instead of being put behind bars. to what extent do you agree?

Essay topics:

some people think certain prisoners should be made to unpaid community work instead of being put behind bars. to what extent do you agree?

Crimes in many countries have gone beyond the

alarming rate and it is a common practice to put

convicted people behind bars. A segment of society

opines that not all crimes are equal and repercussion

of harsh sentence for all offences is uncivilised. They

outline the need for unpaid community service as

punishments for mild-offenders and youngsters. I

believe that certain offenders should be given non-

custodial sentences.

The predominant reason for me to believe that unpaid

community services like cleaning streets, planting

trees, and working for charity instead of prison is that

many offenders are not born-criminals and the

circumstance often incite them to commit a felony

Besides, when such unpremeditated convicts are

expelled from the society. they incline to re-offend in

isolation as there is none to accept them. Apart from

this, juvenile delinquents should be rehabilitated by

indulging them in community services.

On the contrary, brutal offenders who commit heinous

crimes like premeditated murder, vandalism.

abduction. hijacking. rapes and so on should be

punished to set examples in the society. Thus, the

background of a criminal and the motif of a crime

should be considered. For instance, if a teenager

steals food from a store as his mother is starving is a

completely different scenario than someone robbing

an old lady. The former deserves a second chance

while the latter should be imprisoned.

To recapitulate, someone with no previous record of

crime and a sensible reason for a slight misconduct

should be treated differently than a serial killer. The

objective of the law is to maintain peace in the society.

not to punish people. Thus unpaid community services

is a great option to let some convicted lament for their crime.

Votes
Average: 6.7 (1 vote)
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2019-09-04 Narendrasinh Dabhi 67 view
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IELTS Writing Task II - IELTS Academic

Comments

Grammar and spelling errors:
Line 5, column 1, Rule ID: UPPERCASE_SENTENCE_START
Message: This sentence does not start with an uppercase letter
Suggestion: Convicted
...te and it is a common practice to put convicted people behind bars. A segment of societ...
^^^^^^^^^
Line 9, column 1, Rule ID: UPPERCASE_SENTENCE_START
Message: This sentence does not start with an uppercase letter
Suggestion: Of
...all crimes are equal and repercussion of harsh sentence for all offences is unci...
^^
Line 13, column 1, Rule ID: UPPERCASE_SENTENCE_START
Message: This sentence does not start with an uppercase letter
Suggestion: Punishments
... need for unpaid community service as punishments for mild-offenders and youngsters. I ...
^^^^^^^^^^^
Line 17, column 1, Rule ID: UPPERCASE_SENTENCE_START
Message: This sentence does not start with an uppercase letter
Suggestion: Custodial
...ertain offenders should be given non- custodial sentences. The predominant reason ...
^^^^^^^^^
Line 33, column 1, Rule ID: UPPERCASE_SENTENCE_START
Message: This sentence does not start with an uppercase letter
Suggestion: Expelled
...when such unpremeditated convicts are expelled from the society. they incline to re-of...
^^^^^^^^
Line 33, column 28, Rule ID: UPPERCASE_SENTENCE_START
Message: This sentence does not start with an uppercase letter
Suggestion: They
...nvicts are expelled from the society. they incline to re-offend in isolation as ...
^^^^
Line 35, column 1, Rule ID: UPPERCASE_SENTENCE_START
Message: This sentence does not start with an uppercase letter
Suggestion: Isolation
...society. they incline to re-offend in isolation as there is none to accept them. Apart ...
^^^^^^^^^
Line 39, column 1, Rule ID: UPPERCASE_SENTENCE_START
Message: This sentence does not start with an uppercase letter
Suggestion: Indulging
...elinquents should be rehabilitated by indulging them in community services. On the...
^^^^^^^^^
Line 45, column 1, Rule ID: UPPERCASE_SENTENCE_START
Message: This sentence does not start with an uppercase letter
Suggestion: Crimes
..., brutal offenders who commit heinous crimes like premeditated murder, vandalism. ...
^^^^^^
Line 47, column 1, Rule ID: UPPERCASE_SENTENCE_START
Message: This sentence does not start with an uppercase letter
Suggestion: Abduction
... like premeditated murder, vandalism. abduction. hijacking. rapes and so on should be ...
^^^^^^^^^
Line 47, column 12, Rule ID: UPPERCASE_SENTENCE_START
Message: This sentence does not start with an uppercase letter
Suggestion: Hijacking
...ditated murder, vandalism. abduction. hijacking. rapes and so on should be punished t...
^^^^^^^^^
Line 47, column 23, Rule ID: UPPERCASE_SENTENCE_START
Message: This sentence does not start with an uppercase letter
Suggestion: Rapes
...der, vandalism. abduction. hijacking. rapes and so on should be punished to set e...
^^^^^
Line 49, column 1, Rule ID: UPPERCASE_SENTENCE_START
Message: This sentence does not start with an uppercase letter
Suggestion: Punished
... hijacking. rapes and so on should be punished to set examples in the society. Thus, t...
^^^^^^^^
Line 53, column 1, Rule ID: UPPERCASE_SENTENCE_START
Message: This sentence does not start with an uppercase letter
Suggestion: Should
...f a criminal and the motif of a crime should be considered. For instance, if a teena...
^^^^^^
Line 59, column 1, Rule ID: UPPERCASE_SENTENCE_START
Message: This sentence does not start with an uppercase letter
Suggestion: An
...fferent scenario than someone robbing an old lady. The former deserves a second ...
^^
Line 61, column 1, Rule ID: UPPERCASE_SENTENCE_START
Message: This sentence does not start with an uppercase letter
Suggestion: While
.... The former deserves a second chance while the latter should be imprisoned. T...
^^^^^
Line 61, column 1, Rule ID: SENTENCE_FRAGMENT[1]
Message: “while” at the beginning of a sentence requires a 2nd clause. Maybe a comma, question or exclamation mark is missing, or the sentence is incomplete and should be joined with the following sentence.
.... The former deserves a second chance while the latter should be imprisoned. T...
^^^^^
Line 69, column 1, Rule ID: UPPERCASE_SENTENCE_START
Message: This sentence does not start with an uppercase letter
Suggestion: Should
...nsible reason for a slight misconduct should be treated differently than a serial ki...
^^^^^^
Line 71, column 1, Rule ID: UPPERCASE_SENTENCE_START
Message: This sentence does not start with an uppercase letter
Suggestion: Objective
...differently than a serial killer. The objective of the law is to maintain peace in the ...
^^^^^^^^^
Line 73, column 1, Rule ID: UPPERCASE_SENTENCE_START
Message: This sentence does not start with an uppercase letter
Suggestion: Not
... is to maintain peace in the society. not to punish people. Thus unpaid community...
^^^
Line 73, column 23, Rule ID: SENT_START_CONJUNCTIVE_LINKING_ADVERB_COMMA[1]
Message: Did you forget a comma after a conjunctive/linking adverb?
Suggestion: Thus,
...in the society. not to punish people. Thus unpaid community services is a great ...
^^^^
Line 75, column 1, Rule ID: UPPERCASE_SENTENCE_START
Message: This sentence does not start with an uppercase letter
Suggestion: Is
...eople. Thus unpaid community services is a great option to let some convicted la...
^^

Transition Words or Phrases used:
besides, if, second, so, thus, while, apart from, for instance, on the contrary

Attributes: Values AverageValues Percentages(Values/AverageValues)% => Comments

Performance on Part of Speech:
To be verbs : 17.0 13.1623246493 129% => OK
Auxiliary verbs: 7.0 7.85571142285 89% => OK
Conjunction : 8.0 10.4138276553 77% => OK
Relative clauses : 6.0 7.30460921844 82% => OK
Pronoun: 15.0 24.0651302605 62% => OK
Preposition: 34.0 41.998997996 81% => OK
Nominalization: 5.0 8.3376753507 60% => More nominalizations (nouns with a suffix like: tion ment ence ance) wanted.

Performance on vocabulary words:
No of characters: 1587.0 1615.20841683 98% => OK
No of words: 283.0 315.596192385 90% => More content wanted.
Chars per words: 5.60777385159 5.12529762239 109% => OK
Fourth root words length: 4.10153676581 4.20363070211 98% => OK
Word Length SD: 2.97210326955 2.80592935109 106% => OK
Unique words: 172.0 176.041082164 98% => OK
Unique words percentage: 0.60777385159 0.561755894193 108% => OK
syllable_count: 468.9 506.74238477 93% => OK
avg_syllables_per_word: 1.7 1.60771543086 106% => OK

A sentence (or a clause, phrase) starts by:
Pronoun: 4.0 5.43587174349 74% => OK
Article: 6.0 2.52805611222 237% => Less articles wanted as sentence beginning.
Subordination: 3.0 2.10420841683 143% => OK
Conjunction: 1.0 0.809619238477 124% => OK
Preposition: 5.0 4.76152304609 105% => OK

Performance on sentences:
How many sentences: 16.0 16.0721442886 100% => OK
Sentence length: 17.0 20.2975951904 84% => The Avg. Sentence Length is relatively short.
Sentence length SD: 68.5549220972 49.4020404114 139% => OK
Chars per sentence: 99.1875 106.682146367 93% => OK
Words per sentence: 17.6875 20.7667163134 85% => OK
Discourse Markers: 4.9375 7.06120827912 70% => OK
Paragraphs: 35.0 4.38176352705 799% => Less paragraphs wanted.
Language errors: 22.0 5.01903807615 438% => Less language errors wanted.
Sentences with positive sentiment : 2.0 8.67935871743 23% => More positive sentences wanted.
Sentences with negative sentiment : 13.0 3.9879759519 326% => Less negative sentences wanted.
Sentences with neutral sentiment: 1.0 3.4128256513 29% => More facts, knowledge or examples wanted.
What are sentences with positive/Negative/neutral sentiment?

Coherence and Cohesion:
Essay topic to essay body coherence: 0.223533353708 0.244688304435 91% => OK
Sentence topic coherence: 0.0704600811533 0.084324248473 84% => OK
Sentence topic coherence SD: 0.0592551445629 0.0667982634062 89% => OK
Paragraph topic coherence: 0.0480376885251 0.151304729494 32% => Maybe some paragraphs are off the topic.
Paragraph topic coherence SD: 0.0649195507468 0.056905535591 114% => OK

Essay readability:
automated_readability_index: 13.8 13.0946893788 105% => OK
flesch_reading_ease: 45.76 50.2224549098 91% => OK
smog_index: 8.8 7.44779559118 118% => OK
flesch_kincaid_grade: 11.1 11.3001002004 98% => OK
coleman_liau_index: 14.96 12.4159519038 120% => OK
dale_chall_readability_score: 9.17 8.58950901804 107% => OK
difficult_words: 84.0 78.4519038076 107% => OK
linsear_write_formula: 11.5 9.78957915832 117% => OK
gunning_fog: 8.8 10.1190380762 87% => OK
text_standard: 9.0 10.7795591182 83% => OK
What are above readability scores?

---------------------
Maximum five paragraphs wanted.

Rates: 67.4157303371 out of 100
Scores by essay e-grader: 6.0 Out of 9
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Note: the e-grader does NOT examine the meaning of words and ideas. VIP users will receive further evaluations by advanced module of e-grader and human graders.