Irrefutably in last few decades, with the advancement of science and techonolgy, technology developments have made drastic changes in the education system. On that ground, with the constant immersion of technology in everyones’ lives, there are very serious concerns have arised about how this technology will impact on childhood development. In this regard, some people contend that children should not restricted in utilizing techonogical benefits. On the other side, there is a group of people who think that .. Certainly, from my vantage point, the former view contains more weight. For the following paragraphs, I will delve into the most conspicuous reasons and examples justifying my stance.
The first exquisite point to be mentioned is that the technology might hamper learning abilities of children which mitigate their academic performance level. To be more specific, children at young age are not matured enough, and thereby, easily get addicted to the use of techonolgy. In fact, children might get distracted while studying for academic subjects, and they eaither start using social media such as facebook and instagram or playing video games for constant long hours. To shed more light on this, my brothers’ life is a compelling example of what has been elaborated above. When he was in elementary school, my parents allowed him to use laptop for his study purpose. Initially, he was well focused on his studies, however, gradually, he became addicted to play videos games on laptop for many hours and not focusing on his academic course which reduced his final grade in the exam. Forntunately, my parents made him understood his mistake and restricted his daily hours of using laptop. Ultimately, it is judicious to say that children should not be permitted to use techonolgy for longer hours.
Another noteworthy reason is that admittedly, techonolgy contributes some benefits to development of childrens’ career, while the negative consequences are overwighed the positive ones. Actually, too much dependecy on techonogy might affect mental as well as physical growth of young pupils and it might get intense over the period of time. Chiefly, when children spend long hours on computers and mobile phones, their eyesight get affected, and they get eye glasses at early age of their lives. Not only this but also childrens’ thinking power and ability to generate new ideas might get hampered over the time since they can find everything over the internet by just one click. To exemplify, based on a statistical data collected from a research at the University of California shows that 75% of school going students who used to spend more than two hours everyday on computers suffered from mental depression last year. On top of that, most of them had started eyesight issues with growing age in last many years. Therefore, it is reasonable to make a point that stricting usage of techology is beneficial for children.
To recapitulate, from contemplating all remarks. in spite of the fact that some may not agree with my viewpoint, I strongly believe that it a wise idea to restrict the usage of techonolgy for young generation. This is because it can haphazardly affect their academic performance, and it can damage their overall health.
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Grammar and spelling errors:
Line 1, column 235, Rule ID: WHITESPACE_RULE
Message: Possible typo: you repeated a whitespace
Suggestion:
...rsion of technology in everyones’ lives, there are very serious concerns have ari...
^^
Line 1, column 406, Rule ID: DID_BASEFORM[1]
Message: The verb 'should' requires the base form of the verb: 'restrict'
Suggestion: restrict
...people contend that children should not restricted in utilizing techonogical benefits. On ...
^^^^^^^^^^
Line 1, column 514, Rule ID: DOUBLE_PUNCTUATION
Message: Two consecutive dots
Suggestion: .
...ere is a group of people who think that .. Certainly, from my vantage point, the f...
^^
Line 5, column 326, Rule ID: PERIOD_OF_TIME[1]
Message: Use simply 'period'.
Suggestion: period
...upils and it might get intense over the period of time. Chiefly, when children spend long hour...
^^^^^^^^^^^^^^
Line 5, column 738, Rule ID: A_UNCOUNTABLE[1]
Message: Uncountable nouns are usually not used with an indefinite article. Use simply 'research'.
Suggestion: research
...ed on a statistical data collected from a research at the University of California shows t...
^^^^^^^^^^
Line 7, column 50, Rule ID: UPPERCASE_SENTENCE_START
Message: This sentence does not start with an uppercase letter
Suggestion: In
...tulate, from contemplating all remarks. in spite of the fact that some may not agr...
^^
Transition Words or Phrases used:
actually, also, but, first, however, if, may, so, therefore, well, while, in fact, such as, as well as, in spite of, on top of that
Attributes: Values AverageValues Percentages(Values/AverageValues)% => Comments
Performance on Part of Speech:
To be verbs : 17.0 15.1003584229 113% => OK
Auxiliary verbs: 13.0 9.8082437276 133% => OK
Conjunction : 14.0 13.8261648746 101% => OK
Relative clauses : 17.0 11.0286738351 154% => OK
Pronoun: 50.0 43.0788530466 116% => OK
Preposition: 72.0 52.1666666667 138% => OK
Nominalization: 8.0 8.0752688172 99% => OK
Performance on vocabulary words:
No of characters: 2749.0 1977.66487455 139% => OK
No of words: 526.0 407.700716846 129% => OK
Chars per words: 5.22623574144 4.8611393121 108% => OK
Fourth root words length: 4.78901763229 4.48103885553 107% => OK
Word Length SD: 2.81624997647 2.67179642975 105% => OK
Unique words: 299.0 212.727598566 141% => OK
Unique words percentage: 0.568441064639 0.524837075471 108% => OK
syllable_count: 861.3 618.680645161 139% => OK
avg_syllables_per_word: 1.6 1.51630824373 106% => OK
A sentence (or a clause, phrase) starts by:
Pronoun: 11.0 9.59856630824 115% => OK
Article: 2.0 3.08781362007 65% => OK
Subordination: 3.0 3.51792114695 85% => OK
Conjunction: 4.0 1.86738351254 214% => Less conjunction wanted as sentence beginning.
Preposition: 14.0 4.94265232975 283% => Less preposition wanted as sentence beginnings.
Performance on sentences:
How many sentences: 24.0 20.6003584229 117% => OK
Sentence length: 21.0 20.1344086022 104% => OK
Sentence length SD: 49.0869233266 48.9658058833 100% => OK
Chars per sentence: 114.541666667 100.406767564 114% => OK
Words per sentence: 21.9166666667 20.6045352989 106% => OK
Discourse Markers: 5.45833333333 5.45110844103 100% => OK
Paragraphs: 4.0 4.53405017921 88% => OK
Language errors: 6.0 5.5376344086 108% => OK
Sentences with positive sentiment : 11.0 11.8709677419 93% => OK
Sentences with negative sentiment : 7.0 3.85842293907 181% => OK
Sentences with neutral sentiment: 6.0 4.88709677419 123% => OK
What are sentences with positive/Negative/neutral sentiment?
Coherence and Cohesion:
Essay topic to essay body coherence: 0.223417476902 0.236089414692 95% => OK
Sentence topic coherence: 0.0543158150032 0.076458572812 71% => OK
Sentence topic coherence SD: 0.0420680164185 0.0737576698707 57% => OK
Paragraph topic coherence: 0.118350695695 0.150856017488 78% => OK
Paragraph topic coherence SD: 0.0343016457301 0.0645574589148 53% => OK
Essay readability:
automated_readability_index: 14.2 11.7677419355 121% => OK
flesch_reading_ease: 50.16 58.1214874552 86% => OK
smog_index: 11.2 6.10430107527 183% => OK
flesch_kincaid_grade: 11.5 10.1575268817 113% => OK
coleman_liau_index: 13.05 10.9000537634 120% => OK
dale_chall_readability_score: 9.33 8.01818996416 116% => OK
difficult_words: 155.0 86.8835125448 178% => OK
linsear_write_formula: 10.5 10.002688172 105% => OK
gunning_fog: 10.4 10.0537634409 103% => OK
text_standard: 11.0 10.247311828 107% => OK
What are above readability scores?
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Better to have 5 paragraphs with 3 arguments. And try always support/against one side but compare two sides, like this:
para 1: introduction
para 2: reason 1. address both of the views presented for reason 1
para 3: reason 2. address both of the views presented for reason 2
para 4: reason 3. address both of the views presented for reason 3
para 5: conclusion.
So how to find out those reasons. There is a formula:
reasons == advantages or
reasons == disadvantages
for example, we can always apply 'save time', 'save/make money', 'find a job', 'make friends', 'get more information' as reasons to all essay/speaking topics.
or we can apply 'waste time', 'waste money', 'no job', 'make bad friends', 'get bad information' as reasons to all essay/speaking topics.
Rates: 90.0 out of 100
Scores by essay e-grader: 27.0 Out of 30
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Note: the e-grader does NOT examine the meaning of words and ideas. VIP users will receive further evaluations by advanced module of e-grader and human graders.