There are periods of time in any person's life that can be considered as a mile stone and the college years have such meaning to me and was my best years. It was one of the most prolific period of my life as I made a dozens of sincere friends, I learned a lot about diverse subjects other than academic subjects, and I practiced teamwork, which is a part of my current career as a researcher.
When I entered the college I was astonished by the ambiance of the people. I met students who had come from different parts of the country. In fact, I gained the chance of knowing my country better than I used to, by making friends with them. Fortunately, I met some rare-found persons among them who are still my close friends.
Having good friends in college, my friends and I started to join some students' organizations such as Green Lovers, the organization with the purpose of enhancing the students knowledge about environment conservation. We also joined some sports clubs as well as some cultural causes. Those experiences thought me a lot about the society I live in.
Moreover, college students have young and fresh minds. They are usually creative, ready to take risks, and they have tendency to be influential. These are the characteristics which help people to make teams and cooperate in order to make a difference. In my years of college attendance, my friend and I participated in a General Health Education . Our supervisor helped us to organize a team, defined the goal of the project for us, and gave valuable pieces of advice whenever we needed. Through the collaborative work, brainstorming sessions, and regular evaluations, I learned good lessons of how to work as a team member.
To make a conclusion, I would like to indicate that the college period is a unique opportunity. Young students can make long-lasting and deep friendships. They can learn a lot not only about academic subjects but also about the real live and society. Moreover, they can learn how to work together, which is essential for being successful in their future jobs. Therefore, I believe that the college year is the best time of a person's life.
- Integrated essay 97
- Self awareness in animals 80
- Integrated writing. 85
- Leaders like John Kennedy and Martin Luther king have made important contributions to the people of the united states. Name another leader you think is important. Give specific reasons for your choice. 80
- Integrated essay- self awareness among animals 90
Hi Thanks for the comment. By
Hi
Thanks for the comment.
By the way, as everythings looks good with this essay except for some minor flaws, shouldn't it receive a higher score?
Look at this
Look at this paragraph:
When
I entered the college
I was astonished by the ambiance of the people.
I met students who had come from different parts of the country. In fact,
I gained the chance of knowing my country better than
I used to, by making friends with them. Fortunately,
I met some rare-found persons among them who are still my close friends.
A lot of 'I' as subject in this paragraph and other paragraphs too.
flaws:
More sentences varieties wanted. Try to use less pronouns or not to use pronouns (like 'It, I, They, We, You...') as the subject of a sentence.
Attribute Value Ideal
Score: 24 in 30
Category: Good Excellent
No. of Grammatical Errors: 0 2
No. of Spelling Errors: 0 2
No. of Sentences: 20 15
No. of Words: 371 350
No. of Characters: 1721 1500
No. of Different Words: 193 200
Fourth Root of Number of Words: 4.389 4.7
Average Word Length: 4.639 4.6
Word Length SD: 2.743 2.4
No. of Words greater than 5 chars: 119 100
No. of Words greater than 6 chars: 95 80
No. of Words greater than 7 chars: 58 40
No. of Words greater than 8 chars: 32 20
Use of Passive Voice (%): 0 0
Avg. Sentence Length: 18.55 21.0
Sentence Length SD: 8.698 7.5
Use of Discourse Markers (%): 0.4 0.12
Sentence-Text Coherence: 0.316 0.35
Sentence-Para Coherence: 0.53 0.50
Sentence-Sentence Coherence: 0.125 0.07
Number of Paragraphs: 5 5