Relationships are very important and affect every part of our lives. Man is a sociable animal. Throught their whole lives, human beings establish many relationships: with the members of their family, at school, in social clubs, at work. In every situation, humans have to relate to "the others". But, who are the others? They might be peers, collegues, friends, relatives. We always have to behave in a good manner in order to make great relationships with the persons with whom we instaure a bond. Truth is a the basis of any relationship between people. Let me tell you why.
To begin with, truth is simple. If we say the truth, we do not have to create any lie, things or facts that we then have to remember and demostrate. Being a liar, implies that you always keep in mind your stories and repeat them whenever it is necessary to defend yourself or your thesis. Although, may can say that make up stories is easy, I do not share the same opinion. Instead, it is hard to wear a mask on your face, being able to lie everytime, hiding the truth. Have you ever considered that we might not being able to go over it? I would clear up that lying is a time-consuming hobby and in addition it never worthy the effort we put in it. Even if it takes time, the truth will come up at the end. Therefore, saying the truth can be considered always the best choice.
Besides, another reason to say the truth is that you will be appreciated for who you really are and not for someone else. Being natural and spontaneous it is one of the most confortable thing in the world. It is the real way to instaure long-lasting relationships, if people know who you are and they will trust you and a fantastic bond will be put in place. This is the essence of true and solid relationships. For example, when I was at the high school I have always said what I thought to my friends. For a certain period, some friends stopped hanging out with me as I did not share their extreme behaviours, making them aware of that. Then, they realized they were wrong and they came back to me atoning. Even if it was not easy staying without them, now I know that I took the right decision. I said the truth and they took back on their steps, I did not lie to myself nor to them.
Last but not least, truth is powerful. It has the power to make us feel better, because we are ourselves only when we say the truth. Quoting Keats, "truth is beauty and beauty is truth". Another reason for saying the truth is that clearly this attitude allows us to be free, without any restraint. Being honest always pays off, even though, sometimes it is diffucult to realize how much we can benefit from it.
I did many typing errors... I
I did many typing errors... I still have to keep exercise a lot in order to get 24! I would like to have an higher average on my essays as I need to increase my chances to take that score! My question now is: how does an higher number of words affect my score (given that the recommended length is 350 words for the independent essay)?
Don't need a lot of content.
Don't need a lot of content. 350 words are enough. The problem of your essays is that: it is coming up a lot of ideas in one paragraph. Well, we only need one idea in one paragraph to give the essay more coherence. like this:
Para 1: introduction. my choice: A or B. agree or disagree.
Para 2: First,reason 1 (1 sentence) + why reason 1(some arguments. 2-3 sentences) + examples for reason 1 (around 1 sentences) + small conclusions (like advantages of reason 1 or comparisons if not reason 1, 1-2 sentences).
Para 3: Second,reason 2 ,blabla... do the same thing as First
Para 4: Third, a survey, conducted in UN ( or in a country, a school, a community), shows that A is better than B.... (here you can make a story)
Para 5: Conclusion.
An simple example (Eating at home or restaurant) for paragraph 2:
Para 2: First,reason 1 (1 sentence: Eating at home can save money) + why reason 1(some arguments. 2-3 sentences: I can prepare cheaper food from food market; I don't need to drive or take a bus to reach the restaurant; I don't need to pay tips...) + examples for reason 1 (around 1 sentence: for example, a sandwich can cost me $10 at restaurant, but it only cost me $5 at home.) + small conclusions (like advantages of reason 1 or comparisons if not reason 1, 1-2 sentences: with the money I saved, I can buy a good book to read; I can use the money for a trip...).
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will be appreciated for who you really are
will be appreciated for whom you really are
Sentence: Truth is a the basis of any relationship between people.
Description: The token a is not usually followed by an article
Suggestion: Refer to a and the
one of the most confortable thing
one of the most comfortable things
Sentence: I would clear up that lying is a time-consuming hobby and in addition it never worthy the effort we put in it.
Description: The tag an adjective is not usually followed by the
Suggestion: Refer to worthy and the
Sentence: They might be peers, collegues, friends, relatives.
Error: collegues Suggestion: colleagues
Sentence: We always have to behave in a good manner in order to make great relationships with the persons with whom we instaure a bond.
Error: instaure Suggestion: insure
Sentence: If we say the truth, we do not have to create any lie, things or facts that we then have to remember and demostrate.
Error: demostrate Suggestion: demonstrate
Sentence: Instead, it is hard to wear a mask on your face, being able to lie everytime, hiding the truth.
Error: everytime Suggestion: No alternate word
Sentence: Being natural and spontaneous it is one of the most confortable thing in the world.
Error: confortable Suggestion: comfortable
Sentence: It is the real way to instaure long-lasting relationships, if people know who you are and they will trust you and a fantastic bond will be put in place.
Error: instaure Suggestion: insure
Sentence: Being honest always pays off, even though, sometimes it is diffucult to realize how much we can benefit from it.
Error: diffucult Suggestion: difficult
flaws:
No. of Grammatical Errors: 4 2
No. of Spelling Errors: 7 2
Better not to say: 'Let me tell you why' in essays.
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Attribute Value Ideal
Score: 22 in 30
Category: Good Excellent
No. of Grammatical Errors: 4 2
No. of Spelling Errors: 7 2
No. of Sentences: 32 15
No. of Words: 494 350
No. of Characters: 2088 1500
No. of Different Words: 250 200
Fourth Root of Number of Words: 4.714 4.7
Average Word Length: 4.227 4.6
Word Length SD: 2.309 2.4
No. of Words greater than 5 chars: 117 100
No. of Words greater than 6 chars: 73 80
No. of Words greater than 7 chars: 41 40
No. of Words greater than 8 chars: 28 20
Use of Passive Voice (%): 0 0
Avg. Sentence Length: 15.438 21.0
Sentence Length SD: 6.833 7.5
Use of Discourse Markers (%): 0.406 0.12
Sentence-Text Coherence: 0.25 0.35
Sentence-Para Coherence: 0.397 0.50
Sentence-Sentence Coherence: 0.148 0.07
Number of Paragraphs: 4 5