Do you agree or disagree with the following statement If you do not make sure other people especially influential people or your employers know about your strengths and accomplishments you will never get successful in life

It is of great importance for people to achieve success. People try various ways to gain a successful life. For this purpose, some people aruge that individuals should make sure other people, including influential people and potential employers, know about their strengths and accomplishments; if they do not do it, they will never get successful in life. Although it is a strong opinion, I totally agree with this statement. There are two reasons why I think this way.
First and foremost, people who have strong power and potential employers can help people to get success by giving opportunities. For instance, when I was a undergraduate student, I didn't participate classess and rarely show my abilities to professors. I wanted to go to graduate school, but there is no professor who accept me as a student. After that time, I realized my mistakes that I didn't try present my abilities such as writing skills and discussion ability. I contacted with a professor, and showed my thesis paper. He knew my ability, and finally I accepted as a grad student. I could get opportunities to do research.
In addition, making sure other people know about my abilities increase self-confidence. If I show my strengthens and achievement, they will give some feedbacks. These feedbacks make higher self-confidence. For example, my cousin did poorly in her school. I hided her self in her class. One day, my mother told that "if you don't present your self, people don't know your good charateristics even you try hard.". She acknowlege her fault, and she told her teacher that she studied hard until late night. The teacher encouraged her, and she felt high confidence.
For these reasons, I think that people have to make sure that others know their strengths to achieve success life.

Votes
Average: 6 (1 vote)
Essay Categories

Grammar and spelling errors:
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Suggestion:
It is of great importance for people to ...
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... are two reasons why I think this way. First and foremost, people who have stro...
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Message: Use 'an' instead of 'a' if the following word starts with a vowel sound, e.g. 'an article', 'an hour'
Suggestion: an
...opportunities. For instance, when I was a undergraduate student, I didnt particip...
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Line 2, column 183, Rule ID: EN_CONTRACTION_SPELLING
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Suggestion: didn't
..., when I was a undergraduate student, I didnt participate classess and rarely show my...
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Line 2, column 390, Rule ID: EN_CONTRACTION_SPELLING
Message: Possible spelling mistake found
Suggestion: didn't
...hat time, I realized my mistakes that I didnt try present my abilities such as writin...
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Line 3, column 1, Rule ID: WHITESPACE_RULE
Message: Possible typo: you repeated a whitespace
Suggestion:
...uld get opportunities to do research. In addition, making sure other people kn...
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Line 3, column 331, Rule ID: EN_CONTRACTION_SPELLING
Message: Possible spelling mistake found
Suggestion: don't
...e day, my mother told that 'if you dont present your self, people dont know you...
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Suggestion: don't
...s;if you dont present your self, people dont know your good charateristics even you ...
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Message: Possible typo: you repeated a whitespace
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...ged her, and she felt high confidence. For these reasons, I think that people h...
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Transition Words or Phrases used:
but, finally, first, if, so, then, for example, for instance, i think, in addition, such as

Attributes: Values AverageValues Percentages(Values/AverageValues)% => Comments

Performance on Part of Speech:
To be verbs : 5.0 15.1003584229 33% => More to be verbs wanted.
Auxiliary verbs: 5.0 9.8082437276 51% => OK
Conjunction : 12.0 13.8261648746 87% => OK
Relative clauses : 10.0 11.0286738351 91% => OK
Pronoun: 58.0 43.0788530466 135% => Less pronouns wanted
Preposition: 21.0 52.1666666667 40% => More preposition wanted.
Nominalization: 8.0 8.0752688172 99% => OK

Performance on vocabulary words:
No of characters: 1491.0 1977.66487455 75% => OK
No of words: 297.0 407.700716846 73% => More content wanted.
Chars per words: 5.0202020202 4.8611393121 103% => OK
Fourth root words length: 4.15134772569 4.48103885553 93% => OK
Word Length SD: 2.98481002898 2.67179642975 112% => OK
Unique words: 172.0 212.727598566 81% => More unique words wanted.
Unique words percentage: 0.579124579125 0.524837075471 110% => OK
syllable_count: 450.9 618.680645161 73% => OK
avg_syllables_per_word: 1.5 1.51630824373 99% => OK

A sentence (or a clause, phrase) starts by:
Pronoun: 16.0 9.59856630824 167% => OK
Article: 1.0 3.08781362007 32% => OK
Subordination: 6.0 3.51792114695 171% => OK
Conjunction: 5.0 1.86738351254 268% => Less conjunction wanted as sentence beginning.
Preposition: 2.0 4.94265232975 40% => More preposition wanted as sentence beginning.

Performance on sentences:
How many sentences: 21.0 20.6003584229 102% => OK
Sentence length: 14.0 20.1344086022 70% => The Avg. Sentence Length is relatively short.
Sentence length SD: 48.0815633553 48.9658058833 98% => OK
Chars per sentence: 71.0 100.406767564 71% => OK
Words per sentence: 14.1428571429 20.6045352989 69% => OK
Discourse Markers: 4.33333333333 5.45110844103 79% => OK
Paragraphs: 4.0 4.53405017921 88% => OK
Language errors: 9.0 5.5376344086 163% => OK
Sentences with positive sentiment : 13.0 11.8709677419 110% => OK
Sentences with negative sentiment : 3.0 3.85842293907 78% => OK
Sentences with neutral sentiment: 5.0 4.88709677419 102% => OK
What are sentences with positive/Negative/neutral sentiment?

Coherence and Cohesion:
Essay topic to essay body coherence: 0.335801235151 0.236089414692 142% => OK
Sentence topic coherence: 0.0811571724922 0.076458572812 106% => OK
Sentence topic coherence SD: 0.0982180537374 0.0737576698707 133% => OK
Paragraph topic coherence: 0.202655866393 0.150856017488 134% => OK
Paragraph topic coherence SD: 0.0902105616202 0.0645574589148 140% => OK

Essay readability:
automated_readability_index: 9.3 11.7677419355 79% => Automated_readability_index is low.
flesch_reading_ease: 65.73 58.1214874552 113% => OK
smog_index: 3.1 6.10430107527 51% => Smog_index is low.
flesch_kincaid_grade: 7.6 10.1575268817 75% => OK
coleman_liau_index: 11.24 10.9000537634 103% => OK
dale_chall_readability_score: 8.05 8.01818996416 100% => OK
difficult_words: 70.0 86.8835125448 81% => More difficult words wanted.
linsear_write_formula: 8.0 10.002688172 80% => OK
gunning_fog: 7.6 10.0537634409 76% => OK
text_standard: 8.0 10.247311828 78% => OK
What are above readability scores?

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We are expecting: No. of Words: 350 while No. of Different Words: 200
Better to have 5 paragraphs with 3 arguments. And try always support/against one side but compare two sides, like this:

para 1: introduction
para 2: reason 1. address both of the views presented for reason 1
para 3: reason 2. address both of the views presented for reason 2
para 4: reason 3. address both of the views presented for reason 3
para 5: conclusion.

So how to find out those reasons. There is a formula:

reasons == advantages or

reasons == disadvantages

for example, we can always apply 'save time', 'save/make money', 'find a job', 'make friends', 'get more information' as reasons to all essay/speaking topics.

or we can apply 'waste time', 'waste money', 'no job', 'make bad friends', 'get bad information' as reasons to all essay/speaking topics.


Rates: 60.0 out of 100
Scores by essay e-grader: 18.0 Out of 30
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Note: the e-grader does NOT examine the meaning of words and ideas. VIP users will receive further evaluations by advanced module of e-grader and human graders.