Do you agree or disagree with the following statement, the quickest the technological development in our generation? We are now live unhappy and unsatisfied than our parents.
The life is a short journey. And, the happiness is the goal of our lives. Some people believe that the quickly the world changes, more depressed population in the world become. In contrary, others disagree, they think the improvement of the technology shortages the distance between the people, and makes their lives easier than their grandparents; therefore, we must be thankful, happier and more satisfied than before. As far as I am concerned, since our generation now works longer hours among the very expensive products, also they do not appreciate personal socialization, and their academic knowledge is very hard and complicated. I strongly agree on that now we are unhappy and unsatisfied. Following is a brief explanation of my perspective.
First of all, people in the past had time to enjoy their lives. They were working less than six hours daily. Therefore, they have time to enjoy their hobbies such as cycling, hiking, running, sailing or diving among the states. However, the technological development creates a global change in the world. Nowadays, we live in a highly competitive world, very fast change. As a result, we are work very long hours daily, from the sunrise to the sunset. Furthermore, the continuous technological improvement raises the market's prices. Our salary is the minimum, and everything is expensive. For example, I work as a pharmacy technician; earned 9$ per hour, this wage is very low unhelpful for paying my bills. Therefore, I work more that twelve hours daily. I can not enjoy my life anymore. In fact, there is no time for any hobbies.
Second, the technology makes our lives easier. We can travel faster via the highly advanced cars and airplanes. But, are we still connected to our relatives. Even though, the invitation of the internet and the easiest way of the video call communication. Unfortunately, our generation forgets the social living, and the sense of community. For instance, we prefer to use our cell phones to keep in touch with friends and parents. We lack the face to face interaction. These days, our emotions are printed than said.
Least but not the last, the study is very hard and more painful than before. Studying is more competitive, and the qualification is unfair in many ways. Take an example, those foreigner students who want to continue their education abroad. They all struggle to advanced academic English exams such as the Toefl and ILETS. Each university asks for a high level of scores. While, in the past our parents did not struggle with such a kind of problems. My mother went to London at 1976, the University educated her the language and helped her to finish her Ph.D. degree. On the hand, I am stuck with Toefl for three years to have the required scores for my licensure. I do not think that the improvement of technology makes the education easier.
Based on the reasons above, my conclusion is that our generation is unhappy and unsatisfied with the improvement of technology.
- TPO 40 77
- Tpo 40 90
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Comments
Essay evaluation report
flaws:
Some subClauses wanted.
Attribute Value Ideal
Final score: 25 in 30
Category: Very Good Excellent
No. of Grammatical Errors: 0 2
No. of Spelling Errors: 0 2
No. of Sentences: 37 15
No. of Words: 499 350
No. of Characters: 2390 1500
No. of Different Words: 264 200
Fourth Root of Number of Words: 4.726 4.7
Average Word Length: 4.79 4.6
Word Length SD: 2.65 2.4
No. of Words greater than 5 chars: 158 100
No. of Words greater than 6 chars: 114 80
No. of Words greater than 7 chars: 84 40
No. of Words greater than 8 chars: 58 20
Use of Passive Voice (%): 0 0
Avg. Sentence Length: 13.486 21.0
Sentence Length SD: 6.697 7.5
Use of Discourse Markers (%): 0.432 0.12
Sentence-Text Coherence: 0.22 0.35
Sentence-Para Coherence: 0.376 0.50
Sentence-Sentence Coherence: 0.089 0.07
Number of Paragraphs: 5 5
Grammar and spelling errors:
Line 1, column 100, Rule ID: THE_EXACTLY_THE[1]
Message: Duplicated 'the' in the phrase: 'the quickly the'. Did you mean 'quickly the'?
Suggestion: quickly the
... of our lives. Some people believe that the quickly the world changes, more depressed populatio...
^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^
Line 1, column 447, Rule ID: WHITESPACE_RULE
Message: Possible typo: you repeated a whitespace
Suggestion:
...d than before. As far as I am concerned, since our generation now works longer ho...
^^
Line 2, column 634, Rule ID: WHITESPACE_RULE
Message: Possible typo: you repeated a whitespace
Suggestion:
...xample, I work as a pharmacy technician; earned 9$ per hour, this wage is very lo...
^^
Line 2, column 643, Rule ID: CURRENCY[1]
Message: The currency mark is usually put at the beginning of the number: '$9'.
Suggestion: $9
... work as a pharmacy technician; earned 9$ per hour, this wage is very low unhelpf...
^^
Line 4, column 371, Rule ID: SENTENCE_FRAGMENT[1]
Message: “While” at the beginning of a sentence requires a 2nd clause. Maybe a comma, question or exclamation mark is missing, or the sentence is incomplete and should be joined with the following sentence.
...ersity asks for a high level of scores. While, in the past our parents did not strugg...
^^^^^
Discourse Markers used:
['also', 'but', 'first', 'furthermore', 'however', 'if', 'second', 'so', 'still', 'therefore', 'while', 'for example', 'for instance', 'in fact', 'kind of', 'such as', 'as a result', 'first of all']
Attributes: Values AverageValues Percentages(Values/AverageValues)% => Comments
Performance in Part of Speech:
Nouns: 0.212435233161 0.229887763892 92% => OK
Verbs: 0.13816925734 0.158761421928 87% => OK
Adjectives: 0.0794473229706 0.0866891130778 92% => OK
Adverbs: 0.0759930915371 0.046263068375 164% => OK
Pronouns: 0.0777202072539 0.0685040099705 113% => OK
Prepositions: 0.101899827288 0.118717715034 86% => OK
Participles: 0.0189982728843 0.0351676179071 54% => OK
Conjunctions: 2.80017366001 2.67179642975 105% => OK
Infinitives: 0.020725388601 0.0309702414327 67% => OK
Particles: 0.0 0.00188951952338 0% => OK
Determiners: 0.103626943005 0.0887237588012 117% => OK
Modal_auxiliary: 0.00518134715026 0.0209618222197 25% => Some modal verbs wanted.
WH_determiners: 0.00172711571675 0.0139019557991 12% => Some subClauses wanted starting by 'Which, Who, What, Whom, Whose.....'
Vocabulary words and sentences:
No of characters: 2973.0 2387.08602151 125% => OK
No of words: 499.0 408.028673835 122% => OK
Chars per words: 5.95791583166 5.86048508987 102% => OK
Fourth root words length: 4.72634191566 4.48200974243 105% => OK
words length more than 5 chars: 0.338677354709 0.338922669872 100% => OK
words length more than 6 chars: 0.264529058116 0.251872472559 105% => OK
words length more than 7 chars: 0.188376753507 0.174417080927 108% => OK
words length more than 8 chars: 0.130260521042 0.112833075102 115% => OK
Word Length SD: 2.80017366001 2.67179642975 105% => OK
Unique words: 268.0 212.727598566 126% => OK
Unique words percentage: 0.537074148297 0.524397521467 102% => OK
Word variations: 65.1471707205 59.2087087015 110% => OK
How many sentences: 37.0 20.6684587814 179% => OK
Sentence length: 13.4864864865 20.5533526081 66% => OK
Sentence length SD: 44.0752726218 48.84282405 90% => OK
Chars per sentence: 80.3513513514 120.699889404 67% => OK
Words per sentence: 13.4864864865 20.5533526081 66% => OK
Discourse Markers: 0.486486486486 0.644075263715 76% => OK
Paragraphs: 5.0 4.5376344086 110% => OK
Language errors: 5.0 5.54480286738 90% => OK
Readability: 39.9393922981 45.7405998639 87% => OK
Elegance: 1.14201183432 1.45489161554 78% => OK
Coherence and Cohesion:
Essay topic to essay body coherence: 0.504936890784 0.300154397459 168% => OK
Sentence sentence coherence: 0.0715606925474 0.103427244359 69% => OK
Sentence sentence coherence SD: 0.0711449691609 0.0752933317313 94% => OK
Sentence paragraph coherence: 0.400102576211 0.497263757937 80% => OK
Sentence paragraph coherence SD: 0.162643388013 0.151897553556 107% => OK
Sentence topic coherence: 0.148640401665 0.114077575197 130% => OK
Sentence topic coherence SD: 0.0927105430248 0.0781384742642 119% => OK
Paragraph paragraph coherence: 0.41304453026 0.336927656856 123% => OK
Paragraph paragraph coherence SD: 0.0551886473337 0.067059652881 82% => OK
Paragraph topic coherence: 0.346971464063 0.210909579961 165% => OK
Paragraph topic coherence SD: 0.0696139266077 0.0618886996521 112% => OK
Task Achievement:
Sentences with positive sentiment : 14.0 11.8870967742 118% => OK
Sentences with negative sentiment : 13.0 3.86379928315 336% => OK
Sentences with neutral sentiment: 10.0 4.91756272401 203% => Less neutral sentences wanted.
Positive topic words: 10.0 8.42114695341 119% => OK
Negative topic words: 9.0 2.4623655914 366% => OK
Neutral topic words: 5.0 2.75985663082 181% => OK
Total topic words: 24.0 13.6433691756 176% => OK
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Rates: 85.0 out of 100
Scores by essay e-grader: 25.5 Out of 30
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Note: the e-grader does NOT examine the meaning of words and ideas. VIP users will receive further evaluations to cover all aspects.