Some parents offer their school age children money for each high grade mark they get in school Do you think this is a good idea Use specific reasons and examples to support your answer

Parents seem to be more solicitous about the grade of their school-age children than ever before. In an effort to improve their grades, parents have adopted nearly every conceivable approaches, including offering financial rewards for good grades. Efficacious as it might sound to some students, I am deeply skeptical about this idea in so far as it inadvertently inculcates the cult of gold worship that may prompt misconduct among school children, given their inability to distinguish between what's right and wrong. A more plausible idea, however, would be to reward high grades in a non-pecuniary way, like complimentary remarks, waiver of housework duties or else.
Granted, offering money for good grades can have its merits. Fantasizing about the tempting reward for good grade, children are very likely to be more motivated to strive for excellence in their school work. A handsome sum of money for each high grade can even turn the most mischievous children into swots cramming for exams. Yet potentially high mark children get in school is the only advantage this incentive can offer.
If children indeed achieve a good grade, consequent rewards seems delightful to both parents and children. But more often than not, the situation is less desirable. Children might not achieve a relatively good grade despite their continuous effort to study diligently. Therefore, such incentive is more likely to frustrate than to facilitate children in their learning, setting up an unattainable goal over which children will eventually despair.
Although grown-ups all understand that people study hard for the sake of their own future, children on the contrary cannot grasp such wisdom. Rewarding good grades with money mislead children into believing that the only purpose for their industrious schoolwork is the financial rewards from their parents. And when such reward is forfeited, as it eventually will, children accustomed to these rewards lose the incentive to study hard and their grade will suffer as a consequence. In this sense, pecuniary rewards fail to turn children into active learners concerned for their own future, but profit mongers who only study for rewards from their parents. Parents rewarding children with money might desire a development in their children's ability in the active pursuit of high grade, yet a counter-reaction is something none of them would have anticipated.
To make things worse, it is possible that children under the tempt of money cross the moral bound in order to achieve earn a good grade. He/she therefore might engage in plagiarism, cheating or note-passing in an exam. If such is the case, incentive measures will eventually foster bad behavior among children, something none of the parents would welcome.
In fact, financial reward for each high grade stimulates children's greed for money.
Since children are unable to discern the moral implication of certain events, they unconsciously take their parents as exemplary role models, justifying everything their parents do. Under such context, rewarding high grade with money is tantamount to admitting that money is the ultimate pursuit of life. It may well entrench a sense of money worship in children's mind, viewing everything in the equivalent of money rewards in an age when they are supposed to seek other high-minded purposes.

Votes
Average: 7.3 (1 vote)
Essay Categories

Grammar and spelling errors:
Line 1, column 496, Rule ID: EN_CONTRACTION_SPELLING
Message: Possible spelling mistake found
Suggestion: what's
... their inability to distinguish between whats right and wrong. A more plausible idea,...
^^^^^
Line 5, column 58, Rule ID: A_INFINITVE[1]
Message: Probably a wrong construction: a/the + infinitive
...rse, it is possible that children under the tempt of money cross the moral bound in order...
^^^^^^^^^

Transition Words or Phrases used:
but, however, if, may, so, therefore, well, in fact, on the contrary

Attributes: Values AverageValues Percentages(Values/AverageValues)% => Comments

Performance on Part of Speech:
To be verbs : 16.0 15.1003584229 106% => OK
Auxiliary verbs: 17.0 9.8082437276 173% => OK
Conjunction : 10.0 13.8261648746 72% => OK
Relative clauses : 9.0 11.0286738351 82% => OK
Pronoun: 36.0 43.0788530466 84% => OK
Preposition: 71.0 52.1666666667 136% => OK
Nominalization: 6.0 8.0752688172 74% => OK

Performance on vocabulary words:
No of characters: 2816.0 1977.66487455 142% => OK
No of words: 528.0 407.700716846 130% => OK
Chars per words: 5.33333333333 4.8611393121 110% => OK
Fourth root words length: 4.79356345386 4.48103885553 107% => OK
Word Length SD: 2.75594929973 2.67179642975 103% => OK
Unique words: 267.0 212.727598566 126% => OK
Unique words percentage: 0.505681818182 0.524837075471 96% => OK
syllable_count: 861.3 618.680645161 139% => OK
avg_syllables_per_word: 1.6 1.51630824373 106% => OK

A sentence (or a clause, phrase) starts by:
Pronoun: 5.0 9.59856630824 52% => OK
Article: 3.0 3.08781362007 97% => OK
Subordination: 5.0 3.51792114695 142% => OK
Conjunction: 5.0 1.86738351254 268% => Less conjunction wanted as sentence beginning.
Preposition: 7.0 4.94265232975 142% => OK

Performance on sentences:
How many sentences: 24.0 20.6003584229 117% => OK
Sentence length: 22.0 20.1344086022 109% => OK
Sentence length SD: 48.1492904067 48.9658058833 98% => OK
Chars per sentence: 117.333333333 100.406767564 117% => OK
Words per sentence: 22.0 20.6045352989 107% => OK
Discourse Markers: 2.83333333333 5.45110844103 52% => More transition words/phrases wanted.
Paragraphs: 7.0 4.53405017921 154% => Less paragraphs wanted.
Language errors: 2.0 5.5376344086 36% => OK
Sentences with positive sentiment : 17.0 11.8709677419 143% => OK
Sentences with negative sentiment : 6.0 3.85842293907 156% => OK
Sentences with neutral sentiment: 1.0 4.88709677419 20% => More facts, knowledge or examples wanted.
What are sentences with positive/Negative/neutral sentiment?

Coherence and Cohesion:
Essay topic to essay body coherence: 0.360838354155 0.236089414692 153% => OK
Sentence topic coherence: 0.120670048105 0.076458572812 158% => OK
Sentence topic coherence SD: 0.0635923825255 0.0737576698707 86% => OK
Paragraph topic coherence: 0.201217222863 0.150856017488 133% => OK
Paragraph topic coherence SD: 0.0743517386245 0.0645574589148 115% => OK

Essay readability:
automated_readability_index: 14.7 11.7677419355 125% => OK
flesch_reading_ease: 49.15 58.1214874552 85% => OK
smog_index: 8.8 6.10430107527 144% => OK
flesch_kincaid_grade: 11.9 10.1575268817 117% => OK
coleman_liau_index: 13.63 10.9000537634 125% => OK
dale_chall_readability_score: 8.56 8.01818996416 107% => OK
difficult_words: 128.0 86.8835125448 147% => OK
linsear_write_formula: 14.5 10.002688172 145% => OK
gunning_fog: 10.8 10.0537634409 107% => OK
text_standard: 15.0 10.247311828 146% => OK
What are above readability scores?

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Rates: 73.3333333333 out of 100
Scores by essay e-grader: 22.0 Out of 30
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Note: the e-grader does NOT examine the meaning of words and ideas. VIP users will receive further evaluations by advanced module of e-grader and human graders.