Some people claim that television has negative effects on the behaviors of young people and other people put forward that it has positive effects. Which one do you agree with?
Young people are one of the most important parts of society and they should be trained properly. Their neighborhood is full of things which may have either positive or negative effects. One of the most important of them is TV which is available for all people. While some people claim that television has negative effects on the behaviors of young people, other people put forward that it has positive effects. From my point of view, it has negative effects on their behaviors for two main reasons. In the following paragraphs, I am going to explore them.
First of all, while television is a wealth of information, many of them should not be shown. It shows bad behaviors in movies showed all the time. They show disloyalty, rush, dishonesty and so on that may arise them in people even young people who are at the age of both growing and learning. They may also advertise some bad products which are not healthy for people. All these adverse effects may result in people who are rush, unhealthy, dishonest and so on. These people would have deteriorating effects on many parts of society. Crime may increase and the government has to spend a lot of money on their imprison, their educations etcetera. Due to a high rate of crime, there may be more thief, murder, a scandal that affects the economy of a country. So, by preventing the TV from showing some inappropriate movies and advertisements, there may not be any mentioned problems.
Secondly, TV makes people lazy, they just sit around and watching TV. We live in an era in which there is a lot of fast food. So, Besides, watching TV, people consume fast foods which have a high level of energy. In other words, they have a sedentary lifestyle and eat unhealthy food. By doing so, they may suffer from many diseases like stroke, cardiovascular diseases, hypertension and so on. A sedentary lifestyle which is caused by some behaviors like sitting around and watching TV may also have some other effect like overweight. It is widely proven that overweight is the root of all diseases. People should avoid having a sedentary lifestyle. They should exercise, go swimming, go hiking and do their physical activities. By doing so, many diseases would be averted. So, if people watch TV, they may gain weight and in the long run, they may have some diseases.
In conclusion, young people should be taught the best behaviors to help reduces problems. One of the worst behaviors which should be prevented is watching TV because not only bad behaviors it arises but also a sedentary lifestyle people have. So, deprive them from watching TV and trigger some proper behaviors.
| Post date | Users | Rates | Link to Content |
|---|---|---|---|
| 2019-12-04 | Hreza1992@yahoo.com | 70 | view |
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Grammar and spelling errors:
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Young people are one of the most importa...
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Suggestion:
...ragraphs, I am going to explore them. First of all, while television is a weal...
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Message: Possible typo: you repeated a whitespace
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...re may not be any mentioned problems. Secondly, TV makes people lazy, they jus...
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Message: Possible typo: you repeated a whitespace
Suggestion:
...ng run, they may have some diseases. In conclusion, young people should be ta...
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Transition Words or Phrases used:
also, besides, but, first, if, may, second, secondly, so, while, as to, in conclusion, first of all, in other words
Attributes: Values AverageValues Percentages(Values/AverageValues)% => Comments
Performance on Part of Speech:
To be verbs : 20.0 15.1003584229 132% => OK
Auxiliary verbs: 19.0 9.8082437276 194% => OK
Conjunction : 15.0 13.8261648746 108% => OK
Relative clauses : 14.0 11.0286738351 127% => OK
Pronoun: 34.0 43.0788530466 79% => OK
Preposition: 53.0 52.1666666667 102% => OK
Nominalization: 2.0 8.0752688172 25% => More nominalizations (nouns with a suffix like: tion ment ence ance) wanted.
Performance on vocabulary words:
No of characters: 2177.0 1977.66487455 110% => OK
No of words: 452.0 407.700716846 111% => OK
Chars per words: 4.81637168142 4.8611393121 99% => OK
Fourth root words length: 4.61088837703 4.48103885553 103% => OK
Word Length SD: 2.62277058142 2.67179642975 98% => OK
Unique words: 209.0 212.727598566 98% => OK
Unique words percentage: 0.462389380531 0.524837075471 88% => More unique words wanted or less content wanted.
syllable_count: 671.4 618.680645161 109% => OK
avg_syllables_per_word: 1.5 1.51630824373 99% => OK
A sentence (or a clause, phrase) starts by:
Pronoun: 16.0 9.59856630824 167% => OK
Article: 2.0 3.08781362007 65% => OK
Subordination: 3.0 3.51792114695 85% => OK
Conjunction: 0.0 1.86738351254 0% => OK
Preposition: 7.0 4.94265232975 142% => OK
Performance on sentences:
How many sentences: 29.0 20.6003584229 141% => OK
Sentence length: 15.0 20.1344086022 74% => The Avg. Sentence Length is relatively short.
Sentence length SD: 29.8158438118 48.9658058833 61% => OK
Chars per sentence: 75.0689655172 100.406767564 75% => OK
Words per sentence: 15.5862068966 20.6045352989 76% => OK
Discourse Markers: 3.96551724138 5.45110844103 73% => OK
Paragraphs: 4.0 4.53405017921 88% => OK
Language errors: 4.0 5.5376344086 72% => OK
Sentences with positive sentiment : 8.0 11.8709677419 67% => OK
Sentences with negative sentiment : 17.0 3.85842293907 441% => Less negative sentences wanted.
Sentences with neutral sentiment: 4.0 4.88709677419 82% => OK
What are sentences with positive/Negative/neutral sentiment?
Coherence and Cohesion:
Essay topic to essay body coherence: 0.342725887381 0.236089414692 145% => OK
Sentence topic coherence: 0.100565050794 0.076458572812 132% => OK
Sentence topic coherence SD: 0.128686854139 0.0737576698707 174% => OK
Paragraph topic coherence: 0.251960277981 0.150856017488 167% => OK
Paragraph topic coherence SD: 0.121460211057 0.0645574589148 188% => OK
Essay readability:
automated_readability_index: 9.1 11.7677419355 77% => Automated_readability_index is low.
flesch_reading_ease: 64.71 58.1214874552 111% => OK
smog_index: 3.1 6.10430107527 51% => Smog_index is low.
flesch_kincaid_grade: 8.0 10.1575268817 79% => OK
coleman_liau_index: 10.38 10.9000537634 95% => OK
dale_chall_readability_score: 7.28 8.01818996416 91% => OK
difficult_words: 83.0 86.8835125448 96% => OK
linsear_write_formula: 6.5 10.002688172 65% => OK
gunning_fog: 8.0 10.0537634409 80% => OK
text_standard: 8.0 10.247311828 78% => OK
What are above readability scores?
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Better to have 5 paragraphs with 3 arguments. And try always support/against one side but compare two sides, like this:
para 1: introduction
para 2: reason 1. address both of the views presented for reason 1
para 3: reason 2. address both of the views presented for reason 2
para 4: reason 3. address both of the views presented for reason 3
para 5: conclusion.
So how to find out those reasons. There is a formula:
reasons == advantages or
reasons == disadvantages
for example, we can always apply 'save time', 'save/make money', 'find a job', 'make friends', 'get more information' as reasons to all essay/speaking topics.
or we can apply 'waste time', 'waste money', 'no job', 'make bad friends', 'get bad information' as reasons to all essay/speaking topics.
Rates: 70.0 out of 100
Scores by essay e-grader: 21.0 Out of 30
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Note: the e-grader does NOT examine the meaning of words and ideas. VIP users will receive further evaluations by advanced module of e-grader and human graders.