Some young people have free time in the evenings after school or on days off from school.
Which of the following activities would be most beneficial for young people (ages 14-18) to do in their spare time? Why?
- Gaining practical work experience either at a part-time job or by volunteering in the community
- Learning to play a sport
- Learning to play a musical instrument.
Without a shadow of a doubt, The activities associated with childrens' spare time play a pivotal role in the formation of their future, not to mention their tremendous implications on childrens' characteristics. An unanswered question in this area is what sort of activities is the best approach for adolescents to devote their time. Despite all the arguments asserting that experiencing work environment can whereby part-time jobs can be beneficial in their future job opportunities or playing an instrument can fourish their talents in other ways than studying, I believe otherwise, maintaining that learning to play a sport can enhance childrens' both physical situation and mental health. In the subsequent paragraphs, I will elaborate on my viewpoint through two compelling reasons.
First and foremost, devoting time to physical activities and sports increases the level of energy and vigor in the body and changes the predominant dormant position in children. To put it more simply, young people usually spend their time sitting behind a desk and doing their assignments in specific positions, which can adversely affect their anatomy in the long run. Therefore, doing workouts and sports can alter this position in the middle of their occupations and preclude a myriad of diseases prevalent to the endurable sitting and studying. In addition, changing the mood from a slightly boring condition of studying to an enthusiastic circumstance such as playing basketball can charge the juveniles and help them continue their tasks more energetically. My personal experience is a compelling example of this. When I was at last year of high school preparing for the great exam ahead of me, I started playing volleyball as I took a rest. Surprisingly, after I returned back to my lessons, I felt much more vigorous, and that had a positive impact on the rest of my day.
Another reason to be mentioned is that having sport in the dominant lifestyle helps organize thoughts and make better decisions. In other words, having a routine of workouts can schedule one's mindset in meticulous detail, and this is because of the spontaneous effect of allocating time to physical activity. As a result, a person can do their task chronologically and be sure that no single occupation would be left, nor does anything's due date pass. For instance, consider an athlete's daily plans, they not only do administer the exact time of their workouts but also manage other tasks such as their school assignments or their party with family. As it is evident, devoting time to sports in spare time can be beneficial in various aspects.
Reflecting all motives mentioned above, one soon realizes that allocating time for learning sports is the most effective way for children to pass their leisure time on two grounds that first, it intensifies the body's energy and prevents possible diseases related to long sitting, and second, can organize the mindset and can be a decisive factor of being punctual and on-time.
Grammar and spelling errors:
Line 3, column 971, Rule ID: RETURN_BACK[1]
Message: Use simply 'returned'.
Suggestion: returned
...as I took a rest. Surprisingly, after I returned back to my lessons, I felt much more vigorou...
^^^^^^^^^^^^^
Line 5, column 188, Rule ID: ONES[1]
Message: Did you mean 'one's'?
Suggestion: one's
...ving a routine of workouts can schedule ones mindset in meticulous detail, and this ...
^^^^
Line 5, column 476, Rule ID: A_PLURAL[1]
Message: Don't use indefinite articles with plural words. Did you mean 'an athlete' or simply 'athletes'?
Suggestion: an athlete; athletes
...s due date pass. For instance, consider an athletes daily plans, they not only do administe...
^^^^^^^^^^^
Transition Words or Phrases used:
also, but, first, if, second, so, therefore, thus, for instance, in addition, sort of, such as, as a result, in other words
Attributes: Values AverageValues Percentages(Values/AverageValues)% => Comments
Performance on Part of Speech:
To be verbs : 15.0 15.1003584229 99% => OK
Auxiliary verbs: 14.0 9.8082437276 143% => OK
Conjunction : 22.0 13.8261648746 159% => OK
Relative clauses : 9.0 11.0286738351 82% => OK
Pronoun: 43.0 43.0788530466 100% => OK
Preposition: 60.0 52.1666666667 115% => OK
Nominalization: 15.0 8.0752688172 186% => OK
Performance on vocabulary words:
No of characters: 2514.0 1977.66487455 127% => OK
No of words: 486.0 407.700716846 119% => OK
Chars per words: 5.17283950617 4.8611393121 106% => OK
Fourth root words length: 4.69525374022 4.48103885553 105% => OK
Word Length SD: 2.90944173773 2.67179642975 109% => OK
Unique words: 272.0 212.727598566 128% => OK
Unique words percentage: 0.559670781893 0.524837075471 107% => OK
syllable_count: 773.1 618.680645161 125% => OK
avg_syllables_per_word: 1.6 1.51630824373 106% => OK
A sentence (or a clause, phrase) starts by:
Pronoun: 7.0 9.59856630824 73% => OK
Article: 3.0 3.08781362007 97% => OK
Subordination: 4.0 3.51792114695 114% => OK
Conjunction: 4.0 1.86738351254 214% => Less conjunction wanted as sentence beginning.
Preposition: 7.0 4.94265232975 142% => OK
Performance on sentences:
How many sentences: 17.0 20.6003584229 83% => Need more sentences. Double check the format of sentences, make sure there is a space between two sentences, or have enough periods. And also check the lengths of sentences, maybe they are too long.
Sentence length: 28.0 20.1344086022 139% => The Avg. Sentence Length is relatively long.
Sentence length SD: 82.2864016902 48.9658058833 168% => OK
Chars per sentence: 147.882352941 100.406767564 147% => OK
Words per sentence: 28.5882352941 20.6045352989 139% => OK
Discourse Markers: 7.23529411765 5.45110844103 133% => OK
Paragraphs: 4.0 4.53405017921 88% => OK
Language errors: 3.0 5.5376344086 54% => OK
Sentences with positive sentiment : 13.0 11.8709677419 110% => OK
Sentences with negative sentiment : 2.0 3.85842293907 52% => More negative sentences wanted.
Sentences with neutral sentiment: 2.0 4.88709677419 41% => OK
What are sentences with positive/Negative/neutral sentiment?
Coherence and Cohesion:
Essay topic to essay body coherence: 0.254111298487 0.236089414692 108% => OK
Sentence topic coherence: 0.0802970438419 0.076458572812 105% => OK
Sentence topic coherence SD: 0.0514704725385 0.0737576698707 70% => OK
Paragraph topic coherence: 0.158614128892 0.150856017488 105% => OK
Paragraph topic coherence SD: 0.0283132991501 0.0645574589148 44% => Paragraphs are similar to each other. Some content may get duplicated or it is not exactly right on the topic.
Essay readability:
automated_readability_index: 17.2 11.7677419355 146% => OK
flesch_reading_ease: 43.06 58.1214874552 74% => OK
smog_index: 8.8 6.10430107527 144% => OK
flesch_kincaid_grade: 14.2 10.1575268817 140% => OK
coleman_liau_index: 13.3 10.9000537634 122% => OK
dale_chall_readability_score: 9.64 8.01818996416 120% => OK
difficult_words: 142.0 86.8835125448 163% => OK
linsear_write_formula: 20.5 10.002688172 205% => Linsear_write_formula is high.
gunning_fog: 13.2 10.0537634409 131% => OK
text_standard: 14.0 10.247311828 137% => OK
What are above readability scores?
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Better to have 5 paragraphs with 3 arguments. And try always support/against one side but compare two sides, like this:
para 1: introduction
para 2: reason 1. address both of the views presented for reason 1
para 3: reason 2. address both of the views presented for reason 2
para 4: reason 3. address both of the views presented for reason 3
para 5: conclusion.
So how to find out those reasons. There is a formula:
reasons == advantages or
reasons == disadvantages
for example, we can always apply 'save time', 'save/make money', 'find a job', 'make friends', 'get more information' as reasons to all essay/speaking topics.
or we can apply 'waste time', 'waste money', 'no job', 'make bad friends', 'get bad information' as reasons to all essay/speaking topics.
Rates: 90.0 out of 100
Scores by essay e-grader: 27.0 Out of 30
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Note: the e-grader does NOT examine the meaning of words and ideas. VIP users will receive further evaluations by advanced module of e-grader and human graders.