TPO-10 - Independent Writing Task
Do you agree or disagree with the following statement?
Playing computer games is a waste of time. Children should not be allowed to play them.
Use specific reasons and examples to support your answer.
Nowadays, computer games are part of everyday routine of children, thus, these games can mold their personality, mood and how they deal with individuals. Some believe that children spending their whole time in playing video games are totally waste of time, but, others have different perspective. In my opinion, computer games has negative effects on the child's well being. I feel this way for two main reasons, which I will explore in the following essay.
First of all, Teenagers are becoming addicted to computer games, hence, they neglect their overall health. Also, instead of studying and researching for assignments their time is solely being devoted in playing games, therefore, school performance may also suffer, which results in poor grades and dropping in class. My own experience is a compelling example of this. My nephew is addicted to ragnarok game, he just stared at the computer and played for long hours, without anything to eat or drink. His health decline because of this routine, he now suffers from poor eye sight due to excessive exposure to radiation of the computer screen, so, his doctor advised him to wear prescription glasses to correct his eyesight. For this reason, I believe their parents should not let their children to play excessive computer games, due to the negative effects on their overall health will decline.
Secondly, computer games will cause bridge in gap in communication with regards to family and friends. Most young adults are faced with this dilemma, communication became sparsely thin and social skills rapidly declined. Researchers studied this pattern of behavior between age 6- 15 years old, and the results were shocked the world, the findings were children who spends 10 hours a day in computer consoles deprived their selves with emotional support and companion with people around them. In addition, computer gamer's time are wasted, because they allocate their time in non productive activities, activities that are productive are neglected such as good health, communication and social skills. Moreover, developmental delays are predominant in children who are among 3-8 years old, like speech delays occur, typically a 3 year old can talk few words, but, researchers found out that they speech stunted in development because of early exposure to computer games. Accordingly, I think that it is best to not let young children to be allowed computer games because it non productive and can cause developmental delays in children.
In conclusion, I believe that playing computer games is unproductive for children and has negative effects on their health. This is because developmental delay can happened and their health will decline.
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Grammar and spelling errors:
Line 3, column 570, Rule ID: EYE_BROW[1]
Message: This word is usually spelt together: 'eyesight'.
Suggestion: eyesight
... this routine, he now suffers from poor eye sight due to excessive exposure to radiation ...
^^^^^^^^^
Line 5, column 185, Rule ID: WHITESPACE_RULE
Message: Possible typo: you repeated a whitespace
Suggestion:
...emma, communication became sparsely thin and social skills rapidly declined. Rese...
^^
Transition Words or Phrases used:
accordingly, also, but, first, hence, if, may, moreover, second, secondly, so, therefore, thus, well, i feel, i think, in addition, in conclusion, such as, first of all, in my opinion
Attributes: Values AverageValues Percentages(Values/AverageValues)% => Comments
Performance on Part of Speech:
To be verbs : 20.0 15.1003584229 132% => OK
Auxiliary verbs: 10.0 9.8082437276 102% => OK
Conjunction : 13.0 13.8261648746 94% => OK
Relative clauses : 9.0 11.0286738351 82% => OK
Pronoun: 45.0 43.0788530466 104% => OK
Preposition: 54.0 52.1666666667 104% => OK
Nominalization: 9.0 8.0752688172 111% => OK
Performance on vocabulary words:
No of characters: 2273.0 1977.66487455 115% => OK
No of words: 430.0 407.700716846 105% => OK
Chars per words: 5.28604651163 4.8611393121 109% => OK
Fourth root words length: 4.55372829156 4.48103885553 102% => OK
Word Length SD: 2.69467455498 2.67179642975 101% => OK
Unique words: 241.0 212.727598566 113% => OK
Unique words percentage: 0.560465116279 0.524837075471 107% => OK
syllable_count: 684.9 618.680645161 111% => OK
avg_syllables_per_word: 1.6 1.51630824373 106% => OK
A sentence (or a clause, phrase) starts by:
Pronoun: 13.0 9.59856630824 135% => OK
Article: 1.0 3.08781362007 32% => OK
Subordination: 1.0 3.51792114695 28% => OK
Conjunction: 1.0 1.86738351254 54% => OK
Preposition: 6.0 4.94265232975 121% => OK
Performance on sentences:
How many sentences: 18.0 20.6003584229 87% => OK
Sentence length: 23.0 20.1344086022 114% => OK
Sentence length SD: 63.5235933617 48.9658058833 130% => OK
Chars per sentence: 126.277777778 100.406767564 126% => OK
Words per sentence: 23.8888888889 20.6045352989 116% => OK
Discourse Markers: 10.1666666667 5.45110844103 187% => OK
Paragraphs: 4.0 4.53405017921 88% => OK
Language errors: 2.0 5.5376344086 36% => OK
Sentences with positive sentiment : 5.0 11.8709677419 42% => More positive sentences wanted.
Sentences with negative sentiment : 11.0 3.85842293907 285% => Less negative sentences wanted.
Sentences with neutral sentiment: 2.0 4.88709677419 41% => OK
What are sentences with positive/Negative/neutral sentiment?
Coherence and Cohesion:
Essay topic to essay body coherence: 0.219788919567 0.236089414692 93% => OK
Sentence topic coherence: 0.074553945252 0.076458572812 98% => OK
Sentence topic coherence SD: 0.0497723619104 0.0737576698707 67% => OK
Paragraph topic coherence: 0.141080449234 0.150856017488 94% => OK
Paragraph topic coherence SD: 0.0331819374259 0.0645574589148 51% => OK
Essay readability:
automated_readability_index: 15.4 11.7677419355 131% => OK
flesch_reading_ease: 48.13 58.1214874552 83% => OK
smog_index: 3.1 6.10430107527 51% => Smog_index is low.
flesch_kincaid_grade: 12.3 10.1575268817 121% => OK
coleman_liau_index: 13.7 10.9000537634 126% => OK
dale_chall_readability_score: 8.41 8.01818996416 105% => OK
difficult_words: 99.0 86.8835125448 114% => OK
linsear_write_formula: 8.0 10.002688172 80% => OK
gunning_fog: 11.2 10.0537634409 111% => OK
text_standard: 8.0 10.247311828 78% => OK
What are above readability scores?
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Better to have 5 paragraphs with 3 arguments. And try always support/against one side but compare two sides, like this:
para 1: introduction
para 2: reason 1. address both of the views presented for reason 1
para 3: reason 2. address both of the views presented for reason 2
para 4: reason 3. address both of the views presented for reason 3
para 5: conclusion.
So how to find out those reasons. There is a formula:
reasons == advantages or
reasons == disadvantages
for example, we can always apply 'save time', 'save/make money', 'find a job', 'make friends', 'get more information' as reasons to all essay/speaking topics.
or we can apply 'waste time', 'waste money', 'no job', 'make bad friends', 'get bad information' as reasons to all essay/speaking topics.
Rates: 76.6666666667 out of 100
Scores by essay e-grader: 23.0 Out of 30
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Note: the e-grader does NOT examine the meaning of words and ideas. VIP users will receive further evaluations by advanced module of e-grader and human graders.