TPO-20 - Independent Writing Task Do you agree or disagree with the following statement? Successful people try new things and take risks rather than only doing what they know how to do well. Use specific reasons and examples to support your answer.

Submitted by Sar on Sun, 01/15/2017 - 19:30

Having success required a hardwork and learning new things each day. Some people take risks rather than only doing the same things. I believe that one the best way to try new things is taking the risks because it helps us to get the new idea and widen our knowledge.

First, success comes from accepting the new challenge and put ourself in the risk. It might turn to the wrong way and we become a failer. But, we will learn from the experiance that gives varieties of idea. Scientist always research the new material and collect the databases from other scientist. Then, design a new way and do a lot of experiance to pursue their goal to make an innovative method. Therefore, researchers take some risk and sometimes, it requires a year to get the require results.

Second, new idea encourages people to study more books and collect other opinion about subject. So, it helps them to become close to their target. To give an example, when the university`s math professor asks their students about solving the mathemtical question. Some of the intelligent student try to read more books and Finds a new formula to solve it quicker. During the risky process, They learn new materials and formula which can help them during their exam.

In conclusion, successful society always take risks and I agree with the statement.

Votes
Average: 7.3 (3 votes)
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Grammar and spelling errors:
Line 3, column 479, Rule ID: A_INFINITVE[1]
Message: Probably a wrong construction: a/the + infinitive
...nd sometimes, it requires a year to get the require results. Second, new idea encourage...
^^^^^^^^^^^
Line 5, column 270, Rule ID: SOME_OF_THE[1]
Message: Simply use 'some'.
Suggestion: Some
...about solving the mathemtical question. Some of the intelligent student try to read more bo...
^^^^^^^^^^^
Line 5, column 472, Rule ID: WHITESPACE_RULE
Message: Possible typo: you repeated a whitespace
Suggestion:
... which can help them during their exam. In conclusion, successful society always...
^^^^^^

Transition Words or Phrases used:
but, first, second, so, then, therefore, in conclusion

Attributes: Values AverageValues Percentages(Values/AverageValues)% => Comments

Performance on Part of Speech:
To be verbs : 1.0 15.1003584229 7% => More to be verbs wanted.
Auxiliary verbs: 3.0 9.8082437276 31% => OK
Conjunction : 11.0 13.8261648746 80% => OK
Relative clauses : 4.0 11.0286738351 36% => More relative clauses wanted.
Pronoun: 20.0 43.0788530466 46% => OK
Preposition: 25.0 52.1666666667 48% => More preposition wanted.
Nominalization: 4.0 8.0752688172 50% => More nominalization wanted.

Performance on vocabulary words:
No of characters: 1105.0 1977.66487455 56% => More number of characters wanted.
No of words: 228.0 407.700716846 56% => More content wanted.
Chars per words: 4.84649122807 4.8611393121 100% => OK
Fourth root words length: 3.88582923847 4.48103885553 87% => OK
Word Length SD: 2.54719608788 2.67179642975 95% => OK
Unique words: 136.0 212.727598566 64% => More unique words wanted.
Unique words percentage: 0.59649122807 0.524837075471 114% => OK
syllable_count: 332.1 618.680645161 54% => syllable counts are too short.
avg_syllables_per_word: 1.5 1.51630824373 99% => OK

A sentence (or a clause, phrase) starts by:
Pronoun: 6.0 9.59856630824 63% => OK
Interrogative: 1.0 0.994623655914 101% => OK
Article: 0.0 3.08781362007 0% => OK
Subordination: 1.0 3.51792114695 28% => OK
Conjunction: 0.0 1.86738351254 0% => OK
Preposition: 3.0 4.94265232975 61% => OK

Performance on sentences:
How many sentences: 15.0 20.6003584229 73% => OK
Sentence length: 15.0 20.1344086022 74% => OK
Sentence length SD: 23.0028017617 48.9658058833 47% => The essay contains lots of sentences with the similar length. More sentence varieties wanted.
Chars per sentence: 73.6666666667 100.406767564 73% => OK
Words per sentence: 15.2 20.6045352989 74% => OK
Discourse Markers: 3.6 5.45110844103 66% => OK
Paragraphs: 4.0 4.53405017921 88% => OK
Language errors: 3.0 5.5376344086 54% => OK
Sentences with positive sentiment : 10.0 11.8709677419 84% => OK
Sentences with negative sentiment : 3.0 3.85842293907 78% => OK
Sentences with neutral sentiment: 2.0 4.88709677419 41% => OK
What are sentences with positive/Negative/neutral sentiment?

Coherence and Cohesion:
Essay topic to essay body coherence: 0.209472648465 0.236089414692 89% => OK
Sentence topic coherence: 0.07225212499 0.076458572812 94% => OK
Sentence topic coherence SD: 0.0809814679725 0.0737576698707 110% => OK
Paragraph topic coherence: 0.153511760153 0.150856017488 102% => OK
Paragraph topic coherence SD: 0.0852023629926 0.0645574589148 132% => OK

Essay readability:
automated_readability_index: 9.0 11.7677419355 76% => Automated_readability_index is low.
flesch_reading_ease: 64.71 58.1214874552 111% => OK
smog_index: 3.1 6.10430107527 51% => Smog_index is low.
flesch_kincaid_grade: 8.0 10.1575268817 79% => OK
coleman_liau_index: 10.26 10.9000537634 94% => OK
dale_chall_readability_score: 8.26 8.01818996416 103% => OK
difficult_words: 56.0 86.8835125448 64% => More difficult words wanted.
linsear_write_formula: 6.0 10.002688172 60% => Linsear_write_formula is low.
gunning_fog: 8.0 10.0537634409 80% => OK
text_standard: 8.0 10.247311828 78% => OK
What are above readability scores?

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We are expecting: No. of Words: 350 while No. of Different Words: 200
Better to have 5 paragraphs with 3 arguments. And try always support/against one side but compare two sides, like this:

para 1: introduction
para 2: reason 1. address both of the views presented for reason 1
para 3: reason 2. address both of the views presented for reason 2
para 4: reason 3. address both of the views presented for reason 3
para 5: conclusion.

So how to find out those reasons. There is a formula:

reasons == advantages or

reasons == disadvantages

for example, we can always apply 'save time', 'save/make money', 'find a job', 'make friends', 'get more information' as reasons to all essay/speaking topics.

or we can apply 'waste time', 'waste money', 'no job', 'make bad friends', 'get bad information' as reasons to all essay/speaking topics.

Minimum 250 words wanted.

Rates: 60.0 out of 100
Scores by essay e-grader: 18.0 Out of 30
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Note: the e-grader does NOT examine the meaning of words and ideas. VIP users will receive further evaluations by advanced module of e-grader and human graders.