TPO 45- Do you agree or disagree with the following statement?In the past, young people depended too much on their parents to make decisions for them; today young people are better able to make decisions about their own lives.Use s
Throughout history, we have confronted tremendous changes in every aspect of life, and some of them have a great influence on other parts of life. Children's relationship with their parents can be considered as one of the bold changes, for instance, their dependency on parents for deciding for kids' personal life which was severe in the past especially for choosing future wife and job. while some people accept these changes, others hold an opposite opinion and do not think so. Personally, I strongly concur with this phenomenon, also, believe the fact that not only did they have an influence on their children's choice, but also I think they completely opted for them. I will mention two facts from my point of view, both of which will be mentioned in the following paragraphs.
The first thing that juts out of my mind immediately pondering this issue is the fact that one of our important decisions in life is nothing but choosing wife, to spend our whole life with. As you may already know, in the past, parents had key roles in this matter and even they said with whom their son had to be married. However at the present time, it is only the boy who makes this important decision, the parents see the girl even after they got married. There is an interesting example in my family to compare these two situations. My father and mother married in a traditional style and they met each other only few minutes before the marriage ceremony, while my brother, who lives in Canada, one day brought a girl to our home and told my parents this is Sara we got married last week, and we accepted her to our family passionately. To sum up, youths in the current era opt their own options without intervening parents.
Secondly, after marriage which has an influence on all parts of a person's life, there is another issue which is not less important than marriage and that is choosing a good occupation. In the past, most of the individuals keep on their father's job for example, if somebody's father was ironsmith, he began his career in his father's shop since childhood to learn the concept of that job from the master. It is not true any more we see many young people start their jobs without any connection to their parents' job. There was a survey in my country, publishing in Times magazine. Scholars studied 1000 young folks about their future job choices, they asked from people what they want to do for their whole life as a job, the result showed only %5 of them was eager to continue their father's career.
To make the long story short, according to the aforementioned arguments, it is crystal clear that nowadays, young people tend to be independent in many aspects of their lives such as deciding for marriage and job. It is good in my opinion since they do not feel they depend on their family to be a successful person in their life which helps them to improve their self-confidence.
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| 2023-05-10 | hesami | 73 | view |
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Grammar and spelling errors:
Line 1, column 388, Rule ID: UPPERCASE_SENTENCE_START
Message: This sentence does not start with an uppercase letter
Suggestion: While
...ially for choosing future wife and job. while some people accept these changes, other...
^^^^^
Line 2, column 323, Rule ID: SENT_START_CONJUNCTIVE_LINKING_ADVERB_COMMA[1]
Message: Did you forget a comma after a conjunctive/linking adverb?
Suggestion: However,
... with whom their son had to be married. However at the present time, it is only the boy...
^^^^^^^
Line 2, column 567, Rule ID: IN_A_X_MANNER[1]
Message: Consider replacing "in a traditional style" with adverb for "traditional"; eg, "in a hasty manner" with "hastily".
...ituations. My father and mother married in a traditional style and they met each other only few minute...
^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^
Line 3, column 67, Rule ID: POSSESIVE_APOSTROPHE[2]
Message: Possible typo: apostrophe is missing. Did you mean 'persons'' or 'person's'?
Suggestion: persons'; person's
...hich has an influence on all parts of a persons life, there is another issue which is n...
^^^^^^^
Transition Words or Phrases used:
also, but, first, however, if, may, second, secondly, so, while, for example, for instance, i think, such as, in my opinion, to sum up
Attributes: Values AverageValues Percentages(Values/AverageValues)% => Comments
Performance on Part of Speech:
To be verbs : 20.0 15.1003584229 132% => OK
Auxiliary verbs: 4.0 9.8082437276 41% => OK
Conjunction : 12.0 13.8261648746 87% => OK
Relative clauses : 14.0 11.0286738351 127% => OK
Pronoun: 69.0 43.0788530466 160% => Less pronouns wanted
Preposition: 73.0 52.1666666667 140% => OK
Nominalization: 8.0 8.0752688172 99% => OK
Performance on vocabulary words:
No of characters: 2383.0 1977.66487455 120% => OK
No of words: 513.0 407.700716846 126% => OK
Chars per words: 4.64522417154 4.8611393121 96% => OK
Fourth root words length: 4.75914943092 4.48103885553 106% => OK
Word Length SD: 2.49975812851 2.67179642975 94% => OK
Unique words: 260.0 212.727598566 122% => OK
Unique words percentage: 0.506822612086 0.524837075471 97% => OK
syllable_count: 732.6 618.680645161 118% => OK
avg_syllables_per_word: 1.4 1.51630824373 92% => OK
A sentence (or a clause, phrase) starts by:
Pronoun: 11.0 9.59856630824 115% => OK
Article: 3.0 3.08781362007 97% => OK
Subordination: 5.0 3.51792114695 142% => OK
Conjunction: 3.0 1.86738351254 161% => OK
Preposition: 8.0 4.94265232975 162% => OK
Performance on sentences:
How many sentences: 18.0 20.6003584229 87% => OK
Sentence length: 28.0 20.1344086022 139% => The Avg. Sentence Length is relatively long.
Sentence length SD: 62.9896130963 48.9658058833 129% => OK
Chars per sentence: 132.388888889 100.406767564 132% => OK
Words per sentence: 28.5 20.6045352989 138% => OK
Discourse Markers: 7.44444444444 5.45110844103 137% => OK
Paragraphs: 4.0 4.53405017921 88% => OK
Language errors: 4.0 5.5376344086 72% => OK
Sentences with positive sentiment : 11.0 11.8709677419 93% => OK
Sentences with negative sentiment : 2.0 3.85842293907 52% => More negative sentences wanted.
Sentences with neutral sentiment: 5.0 4.88709677419 102% => OK
What are sentences with positive/Negative/neutral sentiment?
Coherence and Cohesion:
Essay topic to essay body coherence: 0.256390081602 0.236089414692 109% => OK
Sentence topic coherence: 0.0788316898186 0.076458572812 103% => OK
Sentence topic coherence SD: 0.0677725827002 0.0737576698707 92% => OK
Paragraph topic coherence: 0.168555167824 0.150856017488 112% => OK
Paragraph topic coherence SD: 0.0470582978121 0.0645574589148 73% => OK
Essay readability:
automated_readability_index: 14.7 11.7677419355 125% => OK
flesch_reading_ease: 59.98 58.1214874552 103% => OK
smog_index: 8.8 6.10430107527 144% => OK
flesch_kincaid_grade: 11.8 10.1575268817 116% => OK
coleman_liau_index: 9.99 10.9000537634 92% => OK
dale_chall_readability_score: 7.86 8.01818996416 98% => OK
difficult_words: 92.0 86.8835125448 106% => OK
linsear_write_formula: 14.0 10.002688172 140% => OK
gunning_fog: 13.2 10.0537634409 131% => OK
text_standard: 14.0 10.247311828 137% => OK
What are above readability scores?
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Better to have 5 paragraphs with 3 arguments. And try always support/against one side but compare two sides, like this:
para 1: introduction
para 2: reason 1. address both of the views presented for reason 1
para 3: reason 2. address both of the views presented for reason 2
para 4: reason 3. address both of the views presented for reason 3
para 5: conclusion.
So how to find out those reasons. There is a formula:
reasons == advantages or
reasons == disadvantages
for example, we can always apply 'save time', 'save/make money', 'find a job', 'make friends', 'get more information' as reasons to all essay/speaking topics.
or we can apply 'waste time', 'waste money', 'no job', 'make bad friends', 'get bad information' as reasons to all essay/speaking topics.
Rates: 70.0 out of 100
Scores by essay e-grader: 21.0 Out of 30
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Note: the e-grader does NOT examine the meaning of words and ideas. VIP users will receive further evaluations by advanced module of e-grader and human graders.