Which of these actions do you think needs to be addressed most urgently Stopping looting and arson in city centres Improving health care education and pensions Electing a constitutional assembly

Essay topics:

Which of these actions do you think needs to be addressed most urgently:
Stopping looting and arson in city centres
Improving health care, education and pensions
Electing a constitutional assembly

After the Chilean “Social outburst,” that started at October 2019, many elements of the politic-economic Chilean system have been put on discussion to be changed. However, which action needs to be addressed more urgently: Stopping looting and arson in city centres; improving health care, education and pensions or electing a constitutional assembly?
In my opinion, Education is the most urgent elements of our system, which need to be changed.

It is clear that health care and pensions are elements that need be urgently addressed, but if we do not synchronize their improvements with a profound change in our educational system, we will never obtain a fair society. Our educational system has been used by the powerful to keep people in ignorance, making them believe in a false concept of success, based on the superficial, materialistic and (at the end) empty model of civilization that was forcibly imposed on our country through the Pinochet's dictatorship. As an example of this, we can find in the latest indebtedness report, issued by the commission for the Chilean financial market, a worrying number of vulnerable debtors, that is, people whose financial burden exceeds 50% of their monthly income. They have made themselves slaves of financial institutions, following those aspirational dreams that have been embedded in their brains. For years illiterate workers had been abused by their bosses throughout unfair working conditions. Today this abuse continues, even when statistics says that the absolute illiteracy is marginal, there exist a worrying number of functional illiterates in Chile. But even ‘well educated’ people have difficulties to understand technical details on working contracts, economical information, etc.

On the other hand, the Chilean Educational system is used as a tool of crowd control, producing a social segregation where the quality of education is directly associated with socioeconomic level of each student. Depending on how much a student can spend on education is how high he/she can aspire to be in a step of our society. Instead of being educating, our students coming from the lowest social level, are being training to answer tests like SIMCE, PSU, etc. repeating and memorizing certain information, with the goal of make them to become a ‘successful’, obedient, submissive (but absolutely disposable) piece of this machine of productivity. They are not being formed as autonomous thinkers. In my opinion this is the most serious thing of all, our educational system secretly denies the human right of education since it does not respect the most important objective of education: The integral development of the person.

In my opinion, if we do not put attention on recovering the deepest aspects of education, we will never obtain a fair society, where human being were the center instead of money, as it is now. If we start now writing a new constitution for Chile, without focus in the development of deep thought, we just will get another empty book as the one written by the dictatorship of Pinoshit. ?

Votes
Average: 9 (1 vote)
Essay Categories

Comments

Grammar and spelling errors:
Line 6, column 429, Rule ID: ALLOW_TO[1]
Message: Did you mean 'answering'? Or maybe you should add a pronoun? In active voice, 'train' + 'to' takes an object, usually a pronoun.
Suggestion: answering
...lowest social level, are being training to answer tests like SIMCE, PSU, etc. repeating a...
^^^^^^^^^

Transition Words or Phrases used:
but, however, if, so, well, as for, in my opinion, on the other hand

Attributes: Values AverageValues Percentages(Values/AverageValues)% => Comments

Performance on Part of Speech:
To be verbs : 27.0 15.1003584229 179% => OK
Auxiliary verbs: 8.0 9.8082437276 82% => OK
Conjunction : 9.0 13.8261648746 65% => OK
Relative clauses : 13.0 11.0286738351 118% => OK
Pronoun: 43.0 43.0788530466 100% => OK
Preposition: 69.0 52.1666666667 132% => OK
Nominalization: 16.0 8.0752688172 198% => OK

Performance on vocabulary words:
No of characters: 2595.0 1977.66487455 131% => OK
No of words: 491.0 407.700716846 120% => OK
Chars per words: 5.28513238289 4.8611393121 109% => OK
Fourth root words length: 4.70728369723 4.48103885553 105% => OK
Word Length SD: 3.04303294871 2.67179642975 114% => OK
Unique words: 279.0 212.727598566 131% => OK
Unique words percentage: 0.568228105906 0.524837075471 108% => OK
syllable_count: 808.2 618.680645161 131% => OK
avg_syllables_per_word: 1.6 1.51630824373 106% => OK

A sentence (or a clause, phrase) starts by:
Pronoun: 11.0 9.59856630824 115% => OK
Article: 2.0 3.08781362007 65% => OK
Subordination: 5.0 3.51792114695 142% => OK
Conjunction: 2.0 1.86738351254 107% => OK
Preposition: 8.0 4.94265232975 162% => OK

Performance on sentences:
How many sentences: 18.0 20.6003584229 87% => OK
Sentence length: 27.0 20.1344086022 134% => The Avg. Sentence Length is relatively long.
Sentence length SD: 58.8602917986 48.9658058833 120% => OK
Chars per sentence: 144.166666667 100.406767564 144% => OK
Words per sentence: 27.2777777778 20.6045352989 132% => OK
Discourse Markers: 3.77777777778 5.45110844103 69% => OK
Paragraphs: 5.0 4.53405017921 110% => OK
Language errors: 1.0 5.5376344086 18% => OK
Sentences with positive sentiment : 5.0 11.8709677419 42% => More positive sentences wanted.
Sentences with negative sentiment : 10.0 3.85842293907 259% => Less negative sentences wanted.
Sentences with neutral sentiment: 3.0 4.88709677419 61% => OK
What are sentences with positive/Negative/neutral sentiment?

Coherence and Cohesion:
Essay topic to essay body coherence: 0.242961606885 0.236089414692 103% => OK
Sentence topic coherence: 0.0807032392586 0.076458572812 106% => OK
Sentence topic coherence SD: 0.143923071198 0.0737576698707 195% => OK
Paragraph topic coherence: 0.167030806274 0.150856017488 111% => OK
Paragraph topic coherence SD: 0.125982751781 0.0645574589148 195% => OK

Essay readability:
automated_readability_index: 17.1 11.7677419355 145% => OK
flesch_reading_ease: 44.07 58.1214874552 76% => OK
smog_index: 11.2 6.10430107527 183% => OK
flesch_kincaid_grade: 13.8 10.1575268817 136% => OK
coleman_liau_index: 13.7 10.9000537634 126% => OK
dale_chall_readability_score: 9.64 8.01818996416 120% => OK
difficult_words: 145.0 86.8835125448 167% => OK
linsear_write_formula: 14.0 10.002688172 140% => OK
gunning_fog: 12.8 10.0537634409 127% => OK
text_standard: 14.0 10.247311828 137% => OK
What are above readability scores?

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Rates: 90.0 out of 100
Scores by essay e-grader: 27.0 Out of 30
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Note: the e-grader does NOT examine the meaning of words and ideas. VIP users will receive further evaluations by advanced module of e-grader and human graders.