Rewarding has been the ultimate way to show the right from the wrong. For smiling and clapping hands for a baby when he makes his first steps to giving primes to the best employees. In the world of children’s education, some people think that rewarding kids with money each time they score good grades is the best reward while others disagree. I strongly believe that kids should be rewarded with other things rather than money.
Firstly, children will consider money as their soul motivation to score high grades at school. Some parents, while trying to motivate their kids to get good grades at school, they would make promises to award their kids with money. The problem begins when the kids get used to it and would work hard only to earn the money. Some kids would ask for a bigger amount of money every time they score better than the last time. And some other would get depressed when they don’t receive the money because of their bad grades .As a consequence they will grow up greedy and needy.
Secondly, kids at young ages do not normally know how to spend money, or what to spend money on. So instantly, they think about snakes, candies and other sweets that are bad for their health. Other kids would spend the money on video games or things that normally their parents forbid them to have. However since it’s their money, they can buy whatever they like with it.
Lastly, children would consider the money they get as awards as their right or an obligation for their parents. So when the parents decide to treat them other ways such as with books, board games or sometime family trips, they feel betrayed as if their right was taking away from them. Some researchers has done a lot of field experiences in this matter, and their results were similar in general. The experiences were based on recording kids reaction after receiving money every time they win in a simple games. After several times they stopped giving them money even if they won and replace it with a simple phrase of encouragement and gratitude. What scientists have discovered was impressing. The kids behavior has changed drastically and they became angry and more aggressive.
To conclude, I firmly believe that kids at young age should not be awarded with money every time they score high grades. Instead we can change the award and treat them with brain games or adventurous trips with the family or sometimes with just words of encouragement.
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Grammar and spelling errors:
Line 3, column 524, Rule ID: COMMA_PARENTHESIS_WHITESPACE
Message: Don't put a space before the full stop
Suggestion: .
...ve the money because of their bad grades .As a consequence they will grow up greed...
^^
Line 3, column 526, Rule ID: SENTENCE_WHITESPACE
Message: Add a space between sentences
Suggestion: As
... the money because of their bad grades .As a consequence they will grow up greedy ...
^^
Line 5, column 300, Rule ID: SENT_START_CONJUNCTIVE_LINKING_ADVERB_COMMA[1]
Message: Did you forget a comma after a conjunctive/linking adverb?
Suggestion: However,
...ally their parents forbid them to have. However since it's their money, they can b...
^^^^^^^
Line 7, column 304, Rule ID: AGREEMENT_SENT_START[1]
Message: You should probably use 'have', 'haven'.
Suggestion: have; haven
...taking away from them. Some researchers has done a lot of field experiences in this...
^^^
Line 7, column 682, Rule ID: PROGRESSIVE_VERBS[1]
Message: This verb is normally not used in the progressive form. Try a simple form instead.
...titude. What scientists have discovered was impressing. The kids behavior has changed drastica...
^^^^^^^^^^^^^^
Line 7, column 702, Rule ID: POSSESIVE_APOSTROPHE[1]
Message: Possible typo: apostrophe is missing. Did you mean 'kids'' or 'kid's'?
Suggestion: kids'; kid's
...sts have discovered was impressing. The kids behavior has changed drastically and th...
^^^^
Line 9, column 122, Rule ID: SENT_START_CONJUNCTIVE_LINKING_ADVERB_COMMA[1]
Message: Did you forget a comma after a conjunctive/linking adverb?
Suggestion: Instead,
...oney every time they score high grades. Instead we can change the award and treat them ...
^^^^^^^
Transition Words or Phrases used:
first, firstly, however, if, lastly, second, secondly, so, while, in general, such as
Attributes: Values AverageValues Percentages(Values/AverageValues)% => Comments
Performance on Part of Speech:
To be verbs : 9.0 10.4613686534 86% => OK
Auxiliary verbs: 12.0 5.04856512141 238% => Less auxiliary verb wanted.
Conjunction : 17.0 7.30242825607 233% => Less conjunction wanted
Relative clauses : 9.0 12.0772626932 75% => More relative clauses wanted.
Pronoun: 46.0 22.412803532 205% => Less pronouns wanted
Preposition: 50.0 30.3222958057 165% => OK
Nominalization: 7.0 5.01324503311 140% => OK
Performance on vocabulary words:
No of characters: 2032.0 1373.03311258 148% => OK
No of words: 424.0 270.72406181 157% => Less content wanted.
Chars per words: 4.79245283019 5.08290768461 94% => OK
Fourth root words length: 4.53775939005 4.04702891845 112% => OK
Word Length SD: 2.27604970912 2.5805825403 88% => OK
Unique words: 219.0 145.348785872 151% => OK
Unique words percentage: 0.516509433962 0.540411800872 96% => OK
syllable_count: 604.8 419.366225166 144% => OK
avg_syllables_per_word: 1.4 1.55342163355 90% => OK
A sentence (or a clause, phrase) starts by:
Pronoun: 6.0 3.25607064018 184% => OK
Article: 3.0 8.23620309051 36% => OK
Subordination: 3.0 1.25165562914 240% => Less adverbial clause wanted.
Conjunction: 3.0 1.51434878587 198% => OK
Preposition: 4.0 2.5761589404 155% => OK
Performance on sentences:
How many sentences: 22.0 13.0662251656 168% => OK
Sentence length: 19.0 21.2450331126 89% => OK
Sentence length SD: 31.0891812385 49.2860985944 63% => OK
Chars per sentence: 92.3636363636 110.228320801 84% => OK
Words per sentence: 19.2727272727 21.698381199 89% => OK
Discourse Markers: 3.86363636364 7.06452816374 55% => More transition words/phrases wanted.
Paragraphs: 5.0 4.09492273731 122% => OK
Language errors: 7.0 4.19205298013 167% => OK
Sentences with positive sentiment : 14.0 4.33554083885 323% => Less positive sentences wanted.
Sentences with negative sentiment : 7.0 4.45695364238 157% => OK
Sentences with neutral sentiment: 1.0 4.27373068433 23% => More facts, knowledge or examples wanted.
What are sentences with positive/Negative/neutral sentiment?
Coherence and Cohesion:
Essay topic to essay body coherence: 0.27241509534 0.272083759551 100% => OK
Sentence topic coherence: 0.0899485765722 0.0996497079465 90% => OK
Sentence topic coherence SD: 0.0650134694119 0.0662205650399 98% => OK
Paragraph topic coherence: 0.156586446796 0.162205337803 97% => OK
Paragraph topic coherence SD: 0.071564667555 0.0443174109184 161% => OK
Essay readability:
automated_readability_index: 10.8 13.3589403974 81% => Automated_readability_index is low.
flesch_reading_ease: 69.11 53.8541721854 128% => OK
smog_index: 3.1 5.55761589404 56% => Smog_index is low.
flesch_kincaid_grade: 8.3 11.0289183223 75% => OK
coleman_liau_index: 10.5 12.2367328918 86% => OK
dale_chall_readability_score: 7.6 8.42419426049 90% => OK
difficult_words: 81.0 63.6247240618 127% => OK
linsear_write_formula: 8.0 10.7273730684 75% => OK
gunning_fog: 9.6 10.498013245 91% => OK
text_standard: 8.0 11.2008830022 71% => OK
What are above readability scores?
---------------------
Write the essay in 20 minutes.
Rates: 65.0 out of 100
Scores by essay e-grader: 19.5 Out of 30
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Note: the e-grader does NOT examine the meaning of words and ideas. VIP users will receive further evaluations by advanced module of e-grader and human graders.