TPO 19 integrated essayMany consumers ignore commercial advertisements. In response, advertising companies have started using a new tactic, called “buzzing." The advertisers hire people,buzzers,who personally promote (buzz) products to people they know

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TPO 19 integrated essay
Many consumers ignore commercial advertisements. In response, advertising companies have started using a new tactic, called “buzzing." The advertisers hire people,buzzers,who personally promote (buzz) products to people they know or meet. The key part is that the buzzers do not reveal that they are being paid to promote anything. They behave as though they were just spontaneously praising a product during normal conversation. Buzzing has generated a lot of controversy, and many critics would like to see it banned.
First, the critics complain that consumers should know whether a person praising a product is being paid to praise the product. Knowing this makes a big difference: we expect the truth from people who we believe do not have any motive for misleading us. But with buzzing what you hear is just paid advertising, which may well give a person incorrect information about the buzzed product.
Second, since buzzers pretend they are just private individuals, consumers listen to their endorsements less critically than they should. With advertisements in print or on TV, the consumer is on guard for questionable claims or empty descriptions such as "new and improved." But when consumers do not know they are being lobbied, they may accept claims they would otherwise be suspicious of. This may suit the manufacturers, but it could really harm consumers.
And worst of all is the harmful effect that buzzing is likely to have on social relationships. Once we become aware that people we meet socially may be buzzers with a hidden agenda, we will become less trustful of people in general. So buzzing will result in the spread of mistrust and the expectation of dishonesty.

Both the reading and the conversation discuss about buzzing, a new advertising tactic. However, the student who took a marketing class and also a buzzer as a part-time job disagrees with the reading stated by his marketing professor.

First of all, the article indicated that a person may get incorrect information because these information is given by a paid buzzer. Yet, the student argued that a company gives buzzers products and asks them real feedback instead of just reading the lines. To be more specific, the student stated that customers can get true information about products rather than being deceived.

Second, the passage suggested that people usually do not call into questions about claims provided by buzzers because people do not know buzzers are being paid. However, the student opposes the fact by arguing that people who received the information given by him asked a lot of questions. For example, people question about the prices or services of the cell phones. Therefore, it is not convincing that people believe whatever buzzers say.

Last, the student thinks it is ridiculous that buzzing would hurt the relationship of society. He stated that a company uses buzzing advertisement generally provides good products. Otherwise, they can not gain profits and hire buzzers.

To conclude, the student strongly argue that the article is misleading and give wrong impression about buzzing.

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Average: 8.5 (1 vote)
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Comments

Grammar and spelling errors:
Line 1, column 88, Rule ID: UPPERCASE_SENTENCE_START
Message: This sentence does not start with an uppercase letter
Suggestion: However
...bout buzzing, a new advertising tactic. however, the student who took a marketing class...
^^^^^^^
Line 3, column 89, Rule ID: THIS_NNS[2]
Message: Did you mean 'this information' or 'these informations'?
Suggestion: this information; these informations
...n may get incorrect information because these information is given by a paid buzzer. Yet, the stu...
^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^
Line 5, column 162, Rule ID: UPPERCASE_SENTENCE_START
Message: This sentence does not start with an uppercase letter
Suggestion: However
...ple do not know buzzers are being paid. however, the student opposes the fact by arguin...
^^^^^^^

Transition Words or Phrases used:
also, first, however, if, may, second, so, therefore, for example, first of all

Attributes: Values AverageValues Percentages(Values/AverageValues)% => Comments

Performance on Part of Speech:
To be verbs : 8.0 10.4613686534 76% => OK
Auxiliary verbs: 4.0 5.04856512141 79% => OK
Conjunction : 6.0 7.30242825607 82% => OK
Relative clauses : 11.0 12.0772626932 91% => OK
Pronoun: 17.0 22.412803532 76% => OK
Preposition: 19.0 30.3222958057 63% => OK
Nominalization: 7.0 5.01324503311 140% => OK

Performance on vocabulary words:
No of characters: 1200.0 1373.03311258 87% => OK
No of words: 225.0 270.72406181 83% => More content wanted.
Chars per words: 5.33333333333 5.08290768461 105% => OK
Fourth root words length: 3.87298334621 4.04702891845 96% => OK
Word Length SD: 2.6779391376 2.5805825403 104% => OK
Unique words: 136.0 145.348785872 94% => More unique words wanted.
Unique words percentage: 0.604444444444 0.540411800872 112% => OK
syllable_count: 357.3 419.366225166 85% => OK
avg_syllables_per_word: 1.6 1.55342163355 103% => OK

A sentence (or a clause, phrase) starts by:
Pronoun: 3.0 3.25607064018 92% => OK
Article: 9.0 8.23620309051 109% => OK
Subordination: 0.0 1.25165562914 0% => More adverbial clause wanted.
Conjunction: 0.0 1.51434878587 0% => OK
Preposition: 2.0 2.5761589404 78% => OK

Performance on sentences:
How many sentences: 13.0 13.0662251656 99% => OK
Sentence length: 17.0 21.2450331126 80% => The Avg. Sentence Length is relatively short.
Sentence length SD: 30.2361514097 49.2860985944 61% => OK
Chars per sentence: 92.3076923077 110.228320801 84% => OK
Words per sentence: 17.3076923077 21.698381199 80% => OK
Discourse Markers: 6.07692307692 7.06452816374 86% => OK
Paragraphs: 5.0 4.09492273731 122% => OK
Language errors: 3.0 4.19205298013 72% => OK
Sentences with positive sentiment : 1.0 4.33554083885 23% => More positive sentences wanted.
Sentences with negative sentiment : 8.0 4.45695364238 179% => OK
Sentences with neutral sentiment: 4.0 4.27373068433 94% => OK
What are sentences with positive/Negative/neutral sentiment?

Coherence and Cohesion:
Essay topic to essay body coherence: 0.276480379245 0.272083759551 102% => OK
Sentence topic coherence: 0.0884663173787 0.0996497079465 89% => OK
Sentence topic coherence SD: 0.0458865443867 0.0662205650399 69% => OK
Paragraph topic coherence: 0.125808563567 0.162205337803 78% => OK
Paragraph topic coherence SD: 0.0631427534336 0.0443174109184 142% => OK

Essay readability:
automated_readability_index: 12.3 13.3589403974 92% => Automated_readability_index is low.
flesch_reading_ease: 54.22 53.8541721854 101% => OK
smog_index: 3.1 5.55761589404 56% => Smog_index is low.
flesch_kincaid_grade: 9.9 11.0289183223 90% => OK
coleman_liau_index: 13.34 12.2367328918 109% => OK
dale_chall_readability_score: 8.83 8.42419426049 105% => OK
difficult_words: 62.0 63.6247240618 97% => OK
linsear_write_formula: 11.0 10.7273730684 103% => OK
gunning_fog: 8.8 10.498013245 84% => OK
text_standard: 9.0 11.2008830022 80% => OK
What are above readability scores?

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Rates: 85.0 out of 100
Scores by essay e-grader: 25.5 Out of 30
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Note: the e-grader does NOT examine the meaning of words and ideas. VIP users will receive further evaluations by advanced module of e-grader and human graders.