TPO 5 - Integrated
In the lecture, the professor makes several points as to why online encyclopedias have more advantages than traditional encyclopedias. Also online encyclopedias are more authentic than traditional encyclopedias. In fact, the professor casts doubt on the reading through a number of points elaborated as follows.
The first point that the professor mentions to refute the reading is that, online encyclopedias lack academic credentials which making inaccurate contributions in many cases that is not true. According to the professor, traditional encyclopedias are not be accurate and comprehensive source like online encyclopedias. In addition, it is easy to correct any ommision in online encylopedias but traditional encyclopedias will remain for decades with many mistakes involved it. Therefore, this point proves the main idea of the reading wrong.
Another important point that professor points out to undermine the validity of the reading is that, hackers and vandals can access to online encyclopedias which allows them to fabricate or delete data that is not true. As is pointed out by the professor, there are two strategies which can protect online encyclopedias from hackers. The first strategy is that we can access only read version of online encyclopedias to readers. It is more reliable than editable version. The second strategy is that we can prepare jobs for some specific editors to edit the data and eliminate flaws. Thus, this point made in the lecture also renderes the main idea of the reading invalid.
The last point that the professor brought up, which runs counter to the reading is that, online encyclopedias concentrate on negligible and popular topics which create false impression on people that is not true. As a matter of fact, the professor asserts that it is the one of the strong advantages that reflects the diverse interests of the public. Hence, this point is in contrast to the main idea of the reading.
In summary, the points made by the professor in the lecture casts doubt on the reading and provide sufficient grounds as to why online encyclopedias have several advantages than traditional versions.
Comments
omission = mistake, error
omission = mistake, error
Commission??
It should be 'omission', not
It should be 'omission', not 'commission' or ' ommision'. The e-rate chooses a word which is most similar to the error word in spelling, but it is not always the correct word in meaning.
credentials which making inaccurate contributions in many cases
credentials which make inaccurate contributions in many cases
Sentence: In addition, it is easy to correct any ommision in online encylopedias but traditional encyclopedias will remain for decades with many mistakes involved it.
Error: ommision Suggestion: commission
Error: encylopedias Suggestion: encyclopedias
Sentence: Thus, this point made in the lecture also renderes the main idea of the reading invalid.
Error: renderes Suggestion: renders
flaws:
No. of Words: 341 while No. of Different Words: 152 //it means it is wordy
Write the essay in 20 minutes.
better to have 4 paragraphs:
para 1: introduction
para 2: doubt 1
para 3: doubt 2
para 4: doubt 3
Don't need a conclusion paragraph.
Read sample essays from ETS:
http://www.testbig.com/users/toeflwritingmaster
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Attribute Value Ideal
Final score: 22 in 30
Category: Good Excellent
No. of Grammatical Errors: 1 2
No. of Spelling Errors: 3 2
No. of Sentences: 17 12
No. of Words: 341 250
No. of Characters: 1769 1200
No. of Different Words: 152 150
Fourth Root of Number of Words: 4.297 4.2
Average Word Length: 5.188 4.6
Word Length SD: 2.952 2.4
No. of Words greater than 5 chars: 134 80
No. of Words greater than 6 chars: 103 60
No. of Words greater than 7 chars: 66 40
No. of Words greater than 8 chars: 49 20
Use of Passive Voice (%): 0 0
Avg. Sentence Length: 20.059 21.0
Sentence Length SD: 8.321 7.5
Use of Discourse Markers (%): 0.647 0.12
Sentence-Text Coherence: 0.404 0.35
Sentence-Para Coherence: 0.584 0.50
Sentence-Sentence Coherence: 0.157 0.07
Number of Paragraphs: 5 4