Parents and teachers make many rules for children to encourage good behavior and to protect them from danger. However, children would benefit from fewer rules and greater freedom. To what extent do you agree or disagree?
Some people argue that it is better give children more freedom and lest rules than control them with many regulations. I agree with this argument, too much controls children with rules will give them unpleasant habit, such as difficult to make a decision and become strongly dependent on others. Friend of mine, who has over protective parents, usually asks many questions while someone gives her instruction to doing something. She always worry if she probably doing wrong.
According to this experience, I think it is better to let the children doing wrong at the beginning then let them realize and learn from that. When they know their mistake, they will remember and might be not practice the same mistake anymore. This is more effective for either parents or children. Another problem from drive children with many rules is makes them difficult to stand on their own. They will more and more depend on parents, family, teachers, or friends. For example, my nephew, until her six years old, cannot wear clothes with her own. From the earliest, her mom never let her to get dressed by her own. Her mom said that she was worry if her daughter would pick the wrong one. Experts argue that the best way to give children a lesson is by let them explore it in their own.
However, for some reasons, give children advice is necessary. When they watch television over or when they consume junk food a lot, they have to be warned. I believe, beside let them learn from their mistake, several advice is better given than control them with too many rules.
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2013-03-05 | ryanrayhana | 86 | view |
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Sentence: Some people argue that it is better give children more freedom and lest rules than control them with many regulations.
Description: The fragment better give children is rare
Suggestion: Possible agreement error: Replace give with verb, past tense
Sentence: Another problem from drive children with many rules is makes them difficult to stand on their own.
Description: The token is is not usually followed by a verb, present tense, 3rd person singular
Suggestion: Refer to is and makes
Sentence: Experts argue that the best way to give children a lesson is by let them explore it in their own.
Description: The word by is not usually used as an adverb
Suggestion: Refer to by , did you mean buy
flaws:
No. of Words: 270 350
No. of Different Words: 155 200
Number of Paragraphs: 3 5
better to have 4-5 paragraphs, like this:
para 1: introduction. my opinion. agree or disagree
para 2: reason 1
para 3: reason 2
para 4: reason 3 (optional)
para 5: conclusion: because of reasons 1,2,3, so i agree/disagree.
Attribute Value Ideal
Score: 5.0 out of 9
Category: Satisfactory Excellent
No. of Grammatical Errors: 3 2
No. of Spelling Errors: 0 2
No. of Sentences: 16 15
No. of Words: 270 350
No. of Characters: 1244 1500
No. of Different Words: 155 200
Fourth Root of Number of Words: 4.054 4.7
Average Word Length: 4.607 4.6
Word Length SD: 2.128 2.4
No. of Words greater than 5 chars: 76 100
No. of Words greater than 6 chars: 58 80
No. of Words greater than 7 chars: 32 40
No. of Words greater than 8 chars: 15 20
Use of Passive Voice (%): 0 0
Avg. Sentence Length: 16.875 21.0
Sentence Length SD: 5.7 7.5
Use of Discourse Markers (%): 0.438 0.12
Sentence-Text Coherence: 0.338 0.35
Sentence-Para Coherence: 0.465 0.50
Sentence-Sentence Coherence: 0.21 0.07
Number of Paragraphs: 3 5