The following appeared in a magazine focusing on health and fitness.
"A recent study of several nutritional supplements showed that subjects who took a daily pill containing luceen had significantly better vision of distant objects than subjects in the study who took other nutritional supplements. Luceen appears naturally in a tasty fruit that grows on the island of Bonopia, and very few inhabitants of that island wear eyeglasses or other corrective lenses. Such evidence suggests that people who develop vision problems should take regular luceen supplements."
The author of this argument recommends that people wanting to correct their visionary problems should take luceen supplement moderately. However, this recommendation is not acceptable since it is based on some premises which do not have enough evidences to support it.
The first study which portrays the positive effects of luceen supplement on visionary problems is questionable itself because it is not pellucid that how many people are participated in the test. So, the validity and reliability of the taken sample is dubious. Besides, the dosage of the prescribed pills is insipid either, maybe the participant use these supplements on a whim and there is no monitor on the amount of the supplements. So, there is not enough evidences to delineate the amount of taken pills which is crucial in determining of an supplement effect on a normal body. Furthermore, the time period when the study participants have taken the luceen supplement is lackluster. Maybe the pills have a temporary effect on vision and in a long period usage it the sight the sight deteriorates.
The second problem is that the irrational comparing of the first study consequences with the scarce people of the island where the fruit of luceen supplement is growing. The author mentions them who do not have to wear optical glasses or use corrective lenses. In fact, he opines that they uses the fruit everyday then it affect their vision, but there is no evidence to prove this premise. Actually, maybe they use this special fruit moderately or in special ritual ceremony merely. Maybe they only export it and never even taste it. So, this is not rational to suppose that they use it more and often.
Supposing that people of the island eat the luceen fruit every day, again the author fails to provide enough evidence about the number of the island residents who enforce the reliability of the conclusion. Maybe there are only 90 or 100 inhabitant in the island, So it is not justifiable to conclude that all of them use the luceen fruit every day. Also he never mentions other critical factors influence on island people vision. Maybe they have a proper gene which plays crucial role in sight. So they never require glasses or corrective lenses.
In the final analysis, the author recommendation is not acceptable since as it is depicted in the body paragraph above, it is based on the number of premises not buttressed by enough rational evidences. In order to accept his, the required evidences should be presented.
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there is not enough evidences to delineate
there are no enough evidences to delineate
it affect their vision
it affects their visions
Sentence: Maybe the pills have a temporary effect on vision and in a long period usage it the sight the sight deteriorates.
Description: The tag a pronoun, personal, nominative, 3rd person singular is not usually followed by the
Suggestion: Refer to it and the
Sentence: Also he never mentions other critical factors influence on island people vision.
Description: A noun, plural, common is not usually followed by a noun, singular, common
Suggestion: Refer to people and vision
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argument 1 -- Better to accept those data or evidence are true, and then try to find out loopholes.
Only need this: Furthermore, the time period when the study participants have taken the luceen supplement is lackluster. Maybe the pills have a temporary effect on vision and in a long period usage it the sight the sight deteriorates.
argument 2 -- simply argue: 'very few inhabitants of that island wear eyeglasses or other corrective lenses' doesn't mean they take luceen.
argument 3 -- need to argue against the conclusion: 'people who develop vision problems should take regular luceen supplements'. Maybe it works for some vision problems like better vision of distant objects, but for not all vision problems.
flaws:
Don't cast doubt on the survey, need to accept the survey is true, then find flaws from other perspectives.
Attribute Value Ideal
Score: 2.5 out of 6
Category: Satisfactory Excellent
No. of Grammatical Errors: 4 2
No. of Spelling Errors: 0 2
No. of Sentences: 21 15
No. of Words: 420 350
No. of Characters: 2037 1500
No. of Different Words: 185 200
Fourth Root of Number of Words: 4.527 4.7
Average Word Length: 4.85 4.6
Word Length SD: 2.65 2.4
No. of Words greater than 5 chars: 148 100
No. of Words greater than 6 chars: 95 80
No. of Words greater than 7 chars: 70 40
No. of Words greater than 8 chars: 47 20
Use of Passive Voice (%): 0 0
Avg. Sentence Length: 20 21.0
Sentence Length SD: 8.298 7.5
Use of Discourse Markers (%): 0.619 0.12
Sentence-Text Coherence: 0.296 0.35
Sentence-Para Coherence: 0.5 0.50
Sentence-Sentence Coherence: 0.088 0.07
Number of Paragraphs: 5 5