A/D: children should play sports only for fun, so they should not attend competitions.
That, as all the time, there are some proponents and opponents of considering competition as a main factor in the playing sports is undisputable. As far as I am concerned, it would be better for children to play sports, considering competition as a major factor, than they do just for fun in that not only are they encouraged to play much more which has some good physical effects, but also they would be thinking more, having better influences mentally on them.
The first point which should be mentioned here is that playing sports, considering competition as one of its goals, could cause children to be more active physically. To illustrate, imagine children who know that if they are winner of a playing, they will be rewarded. As it is simply guessed, in this case, children would be doing more activities, during playing, in order to be the winner of the game, so it can be said that competition can make children motivated to try much more, leading children, in turn, to take advantages of doing more activities, burn more calories, and consequently, be healthier.
The other aspect which deserves some words here is that competition could get children to think more and more. As children would like to win the game, they try to do their best during playing sports, so they might think of things such as how they could play their roles well in the game or how they can plan to overcome others, and so forth. While thinking of such issues, they are making their mind a lot more strong which could help them being more successful in doing their other activities, such as studying. Thus, it can be derived that competition could be a factor in order to improve children’s abilities of thinking.
In a word, by taking all the reasons mentioned above including having physical advantages and a strong mind, as the results of regarding competition in playing sports, it is high time that scientists considered competition as a good factor in children’s growth.
The other aspect which deserves some words here
Another aspect which deserves some words here
flaws:
1. No. of Different Words: 154 200
2. Don't use this style for introduction. look:
in that not only are they encouraged to play much more which has some good physical effects, but also they would be thinking more, having better influences mentally on them.
3. More sentences varieties wanted. Try to use less pronouns or not to use pronouns (like 'It, I, They, We, You...') as the subject of a sentence. look:
they try to do their best during playing sports, so
they might think of things such as how
they could play their roles well in the game or how
they can plan to overcome others, and so forth. While thinking of such issues,
they are making their mind a lot more strong which could help
them being more successful in doing their other activities
Attribute Value Ideal
Score: 18 in 30
Category: Satisfactory Excellent
No. of Grammatical Errors: 1 2
No. of Spelling Errors: 0 2
No. of Sentences: 10 15
No. of Words: 339 350
No. of Characters: 1580 1500
No. of Different Words: 154 200
Fourth Root of Number of Words: 4.291 4.7
Average Word Length: 4.661 4.6
Word Length SD: 2.6 2.4
No. of Words greater than 5 chars: 99 100
No. of Words greater than 6 chars: 70 80
No. of Words greater than 7 chars: 56 40
No. of Words greater than 8 chars: 37 20
Use of Passive Voice (%): 0 0
Avg. Sentence Length: 33.9 21.0
Sentence Length SD: 14.808 7.5
Use of Discourse Markers (%): 0.8 0.12
Sentence-Text Coherence: 0.446 0.35
Sentence-Para Coherence: 0.658 0.50
Sentence-Sentence Coherence: 0.167 0.07
Number of Paragraphs: 4 5